Spiderman 2 be most disappointing sekwel since Grover's little brother, Mervin, born. Unlike first solid outing, dis foray into web-slinging adventure be peppered wit WTF (What de Fudgee-o) moments and cheesy dialogue. First movie skirted line between serious and fun, but dis movie veer into stupid-silly territory, at times reminding monster of Richard Lester Superman.…
September 12, 2012: Conversations with my Japanese Girlfriend – Podcast #1 (the story of Noah)! Days of Stargate Atlantis Past! Seer!
The cultural divide between Akemi and I has made for some very interesting conversations. More often than not, my attempts to explain certain facets of the Western world have only served to baffle her as she makes the all too innocent error of attempting to apply logic to such notions as tipping, fashion, and vegetarianism.…
September 10, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Hellboy!
Smart, stylish, funny and romantic. No, dis not Monster's horney.com profile. It be desktription of Hellboy, a movie me would call an anty-superhero movie. Why monster call it anty-superhero movie? Becuz monster's Anty Florence not big fan of superhero movies, but she really like superhero movies dat defy de genre by taking established cliches and…
The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Hulk (2003)!
At one point during movie, monster get so enraged he charge into food court and start smashing, stomping, screaming, and trowing Sbarro pizza toppings at frightened children when - Oh, sorry. Dis not scene from movie Hulk. Dis was Cookie Monster's REACTION to movie Hulk, one of de most tortuously long and plodding superhero movies…
August 27, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews X2: X-Men United!
Monster bummed after watching X2: X-Men United. Why? Becuz next to eat cookies, nothing me like better dan to complain. But X2: X-Men United not give monster much to complain about. It an even better movie dan original X-Men movie. For true! Movie kick off wit awesum aktion sekwence in which furry blue mutant (not…
August 20, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Daredevil!
What dat stink? Cheese? Crap? Oh, right. Me just watched Daredevil, so it be both.Movie begin wit young Matt Murdock whose father be a bum. We get cloying, painfully obvious shots of him cleaning up dad's beer bottles. When he visit dad at work at de dockyards, he told father doesn't work dere. He about…
August 13, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Spiderman!
What de Fudgee-o? Monster feel like he in Bizarro world where black be white, day be night, and superhero movies aktually be good! If X-Men was superhero movie made by people not embarrassed to be making a superhero movie, den Spiderman be superhero movie made by people who love superheroes - and comic books. It…
August 6, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews X-Men!
Wowee! Watching dis movie like eating an Oreo after a steady diet of Grover's moms "half de sugar" shortbread cookies (taste like dry sadness). Finally, a superhero film made by people not embarrassed to be making a superhero film. X-Men is true to de comic book, respektful of source material, and touch on adult themes…
July 30, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Mystery Men!
Awesome! Fantastic! Amazing! All words monster use to describe The Mystery Men. Soundtrack. Some terrific tunes in dis movie. Terrific! On de other hand, words monster use to describe de aktual movie = Meh. Okay. And Didn't-make-monster's-eyeballs-bleed-so-dere's-dat. Movie offer promising premise of second tier superheroes who always being upstaged by top-tier hero, Captain Amazing. But…
July 9, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Spawn!
Ever have it when you need to write skript for movie, but tings are going slow so you invite Count and Big Bird to your place for drinks but you do too many jagermeister shots and one of girlz Count bring wit him slip roofie into your beer chaser and you wake up next morning…
July 4, 2012: News of Note! Days of Stargate: Atlantis Past! Grace Under Pressure!
News of note: Save Lennox: Time Runs Out For 'Death Row' Dog In Belfast (PICTURES, VIDEO). From heartless to heartless AND spiteful. Belfast Council has even ignored offers to " to pay the expenses to relocate Lennox from Northern Ireland and bring him to the US to a sanctuary and freedom". Shame on Belfast City Council.…
July 2, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Batman and Robin!
Batmand and Robin be de filmic equivalent of explosive garden vegetable diarrhea. Exciting, sometime pretty to look at, but it still crap. Dis movie be Joel Schumacher's master piece (of shit). Terruble on almost every level. Movie begin wit Schumacher's patented codpiece and rubber ass shots. It den seque into one of de worst aktion…
June 25, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Phantom!
Or, like me prefer to call it: Purple Unitardo and de Temple of Doom! Stop Monster if you heard dis one before. A boy's parents are murdered. He train hard and become a superhero to fight evil. He very wealthy. Have trusty servant. He operate out of a cave. His superhero persona a mysterious figure,…
June 18, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie!
Most superhero movies me have reviewed so far make monster so angry he want to go back to video store and punch and slap around employee, den kick him in the de grapes. But dis not de case wit Mighty Morphin Power Rangers movie. Instead, me just want to go back and punch and slap.…
June 12, 2012: Pirates! Days of Stargate Past – Atlantis! Home and The Storm! Pick your favorite Stargate mid-season two-parter and WIN!
You know you're in a skeevy neighborhood when a grown man tries to sell you six of his hand-drawn pirate pictures for five dollars. I had parked the car around the corner from Akemi's language school and was hanging around out front, waiting for her class to finish, when I was approached by a fellow…