Most superhero movies me have reviewed so far make monster so angry he want to go back to video store and punch and slap around employee, den kick him in the de grapes. But dis not de case wit Mighty Morphin Power Rangers movie. Instead, me just want to go back and punch and slap. Not as much grape kicking. When monster sit down to watch MMPR, me expect weak akting, stoopid plot, terruble dialogue, cheezy speshul effekts, silly costumes, and lame stunts, but me pleasantly surprized. Stunts pretty good. Dats about all MMPR have going for it, but it enuf to save Monty (aka video store guy) me working his grapes.
Anyway, after opening Star Wars scroll, movie start wit bunch of kids skydiving for charity (?), den rollerblading thru de city. Why? What dis have to do wit anyting? Not much.
Meanwhile, real story begin when construktion workers unearth giant purple egg. Wow! What a great arkeological diskovery! Soon, de site will be teeming wit scientists and government soldiers and police men! No? Okay den, scientists and police men! No? Some scientists? How about two security guards wit a lawn chair?
Egg crack and purple bad guy called Ivon Ooze eskape. For some reason, he speak perfekt colloquial English and just full of gags. Me tink he possessed by ghost of Jim Carey playing de Riddler. First ting Ivon do is go to Mighty Morphin sekret headquarters and trash de place.
Kids from beginning of movie (Mighty Morphin Power Rangers) go back to HQ and diskover deir boss, de big floating head, now just a pale guy in full body turtleneck lying in frog pond. Also dey lost deir powers. One of dem say: “We may not have our powers, but we’re still de Power Rangers!”. Mmmmm, no. No. Pretty sure dat you need “power” to be a “Power Ranger”. Rest of group realize dis and so decide dey have to travel to another planet to get new powers. How dat work? Beats monster. How dey get dere? Why, by riding a magik rainbow of course!
Soooo, dey ride de magik rainbow (no, really) to another planet where dey meet sexy girl in leather bikini. None of de boyz have hit puberty yet so not one seem all dat interested in her.
She send dem on qwest and before you can say “filler fight scene”, the Rangers have new speshul powers!
Except, for some reazon, dese powers not good enuf. So dey have to keep qwesting until dey get another bunch of superpowers – and dey’re able to morph again. [By de way, monster diskover dat “morphin” in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers is verb. All dis time, me using it as adjective – ie. “I want dese mother morphin snakes off dis mother morphin plane!”].
Back on Earth, Ivon Ooze enslave parents with purple ooze and force dem to create giant metal bugs. Power Rangers ride de magik rainbow back home in nick of time . Dey fight, each wit deir own crappy toy tie-in mecha-tingie. Dey save a bunch of irresponsible kids taking a joyride on a monorail. Finally, dey all join together (what took dem so long?) to create one giant mecha-tingie. Meanwhile, Ivon Ooze embody other mecha-tingie.
Space fight ensue! Mecha-Ivon kicked in de grapes and right into path of comet dat just happens to be flying by. Ah, coinsidents, de last refuge of writers who suck/too lazy to bother/have better tings to do den come up wit your clever ending so buy de damn toys and shut de F up.
Ivon get blown up. Huzzah!
Power Rangers return to HQ, but it too late for pale guy. Or is it?! Power Rangers join hands and use de power of friendship? Love? Deus ex machina? To restore him back to giant head status. Also, HQ magikally renovated! And boyz hit puberty.
Verdikt: Movie be faithfully crappy to crappy original t.v. series. If you go in wit absolutely no expektations, you only be slightly disappointed.
Rating: 1.5 out of 10 cholate chippee cookies. Movie chock full of cool kick moves monster plan to try out on Monty next time me go to video store. 🙂
Check out monster’s other movie reviews here: Film reviews by resident film criti…
Also, Joe ask me to remind everybuddy only two more days to vote for Greatest Stargate mid-season two-parter!
Cookie, you have this movie completely pegged. I still don’t know why I enjoyed watching that series back them. Maybe because I had a godson who enjoyed it?? Don’t know. Hopefully, you will get something decent to review at some point.
Have a great night everyone!!!!
Lisa R
Didn’t like Power Rangers I see? No worrys there, it’s only meant for kids in that regard so if you were someone who watched as a kid/teenager when it first came out it would of been pretty decent, now it’s more average. So in general I can’t fault you for hating it.
Anyway
Watched Prometheus recently and to be honest it wasn’t half bad like people were saying, and it certainly wasn’t an awful, disaster of a movie people are trying to make it out to be either.
Plotholes(And by god are there plotholes) and unexplained things aside, I liked the general tone and atmosphere on the planet they were on, more specifically inside the structure. I also liked the way they tried to go about explaining what happened to the aliens on the planet(Trying to be non spoilerific for those who haven’t seen).
I’m not a fan of Aliens, infact I don’t remember seeing any of them lol, I just really loved the eery creepy atmosphere in places. And of course the ending.
I don’t think Prometheus is a whole movie, my first reaction when the movie was over was mostly, wow this was good, but what gives? It feels like I’ve seen half a movie, read half a book, in general this movie was only half a story vibe I was getting.
Imagine reading a really good book, and when you think it’s half way through, there’s no more pages? I haven’t had that vibe from a movie or anything in ages, It’s a shame for such a long movie it didn’t feel complete.
*sings* GO, GO, POWER RAAANGEEEERSSS!!
Wait, what? Oh yeah, this movie…
I actually didn’t hate it, which I’m a bit surprised to say. Like you say, Cookie, the stunts were pretty good and there were a few bits of genuine humour in it. However, I assumed for a while that we were supposed to be rooting for the purple guy, what’s his name… Ivon Ooze? Because it would seem that the writers saw fit to only give him any of the remotely funny or cool lines. I did appreciate his ability to create larges swarms of flying guys in bird suits just by coughing up and spitting out a massive purple loogie. Sadly, by the end he just turned into an obnoxious jerk and deserved to get kicked in the mecha-nuts.
It looks like it was filmed in Sydney, AUS, which I thought was kind of cool since I had just been there in April and recognized some of the buildings, and of course the bridge.
I know what you mean Cookie, about the arrival of Dulcea (the leather bikini-ed gal). I was like, “Finally, NOW we’re talkin’!” She should have her own movie. Or something.
Of course, it wouldn’t be a crappy superhero movie if it wasn’t for the “what the…” moments. During the first fight, Ooze says something to the effect of “Welcome to my nightmare!”. Shouldn’t it be THEIR nightmare? Because if it was his own nightmare… Oh nevermind.
If the kids could START the monorail, why couldn’t they stop it? Or did it just happen to be going through the station? Anyway, dumb kids.
If the Power Rangers could fix Zordon (and his ZordCave), are they therefore actually MORE powerful than him? Then how can he be their master and the giver of their powers?
When the parents “woke up” and they end, they all seemed relieved like they were glad it’s over (weren’t we all?), but it was never a given that they actually knew what was going on while they were under Ooze’s control – they just seemed mindless zombies.
Anyway, I will say that the next time I use a flash light, I’m totally going to say, “Activing Power Beam!” Oh, and for some reason I want a MegaZord for Christmas. And a Dulcea action figure. *Ahem*
Sorry, I didn’t get the movie. [Note to self: make up not lame excuse for not watching the movie and replace this text before hitting “post comment”]
😆
Pretty sure there’s an app[aratus] for that. 😉
das
Looks like others, including Cookie Monster, hit most of the high/low points. A few added comments. One, I hated Twikki in Buck Rogers. I like him less in Power Rangers. With all the destruction to their HQ the villian couldn’t shut up the annoying vacuum cleaner?
For a villian who has been locked away since the time the Pyramids were beig designed, Oozie has a pretty sharp wit. (well, less dull than the combined IQs and acting talents of the Power Rangers). I was actually amused by some of the villians’ quips, though I noticed they tended to degrade in quality through the movie.
the Jackie chan wannabee fight scenes didn’t do much for me, though they were not absolutely terrible. But one thing did grate. For supposedly strong female role models, the girls in this movies scream and call for help way too much for my liking. Hard to believe their “spirit animals” are not chipmunk and squirrels.
The whole parents enslaved thing was way too rushed, and really did nothing for the movie from what I could see. I can only suppose they had to add that bit to make the minimum run time for the movie.
It’s with some relief I see that some better movies are coming up in the next month or so. Even better, I possess most of them already. Meantime, looking forward to the continuing discussions of Atlantis.(and was this an attempt to mimic the frustrations of the season finale? If so, it worked…
i thought the poll/contest thing for for atlantis 2-parters only. ah, well. i never win anything anyway.
I didn’t think my choice for the best midseason two-parter was going to come from Stargate Universe, but I gotta’ give props to Justice/Space. It was the full potential of the show delivered in the first season – impressive.
Justice was a showdown masterpiece, real souls laid bare in the course of conflict. I loved how the dialogue seemed very direct, characters looking each other in the eye and having it out, but it was later revealed to be anything but directness these characters were up to. Space was everything I love about science fiction television. And both milked the suspense and then delivered on some twists to boot. I love it when a plot reveals something that forces me to go back and re-evaluate the things I saw in a new light and I did that at the end of Justice, then again at the end of Space.
I also love the civilians doing what they gotta’ do. Volker: Yeah, they have the guns. ← Puts Rush’s fancy fragging in perspective.
And, of course, Volker: Yay <–Just because it's cool.
Hi Cookie! Sorry to say that I missed the MMPR Movie. I was too busy traveling…yeah, that’s it…I was traveling and couldn’t get back in time 😉
I managed to avoid this the first time around and may have dodged a bullet this time. 😀 I did have to put with the jingle when flipping channels in the early 90’s and didn’t want to replant that mind virus. I did remember thinking “isn’t this just a more colorful form of Ultraman?” Okay Ultraman was fighting monsters, and the MMPR team were fighting a…purple corporate take-over artist? I think I prefer the monsters.
I just looked at the movie for next week…Arnold Schwarzenegger as mister freeze? I had blotted that out of my memory. Well, maybe it’ll be good for a few laughs…
On other matters, I discovered tonight that my daughter’s blog (where I posted the Vancouver Foodie pictures) had been hacked. Uggh. So I spent an hour tonight cleaning up the blog and I now have it back in working condition. I’m hoping the new upgrade to WordPress 3.4 fixed the security hole for this; we’ll see.
For anyone who missed the pictures due to the hacking, here is the link again:
http://www.corasgarage.com/?p=87
I was absolutely in love with the Power Rangers when I was a kid. I remember being in second grade and watching the girls arguing over who got to be the pink ranger on the playground (I somehow was always the evil witch, which may give disturbing insights into my personality). I also remember this movie and it’s inherent lameness marking the end of my love affair with the show. It was like I was seeing it for its true awfulness for the first time and a little piece of my childhood died. Personally I would rate this as a negative cholate chippee cookies. Would that be gluten-free, vegan carob chip cookies or a dozen dry celery sticks with no peanut butter or salad dressing?
Sadly I was flipping through channels the other day and the poor, poor actor who played the white/green ranger is somehow still on the show eighteen years later. If I were him I probably would have found a new career by now.
This was bad. Not as bad as I was expecting but still pretty bad!
It was a nice surprise to see the Sydney skyline. This must have been filmed around the time that Australia was giving tax breaks to movie productions. Warner Brothers set up a studio on the Gold Coast in 1991 and culminated in Fox Studios opening in Sydney in 1998 where The Matrix and Mission Impossible were filmed.
I believe the sky diving wasn’t even for charity. It was to celebrate the arrival of the comet! So the writers managed to tie in the opening sequence of the movie with the climax so that makes it hardly lame at all! The writers were being clever!
Ivon Ooze, evil beyond imagination (actual quote!) . . . in the form of purple hi-viz vests and hard hats for his zombie minions. Gotta follow health and safety laws even if you’re an evil 6000 year old monster!
Ugh, it’s hard to decide which is worse, power rangers or those so-called ninja talking turtles. I’m soooooo glad our boys are out of the power ranger phase. Though I do have good memories of a dozen 6 year old boys at a birthday party doing their power moves in time to the “training” video.
Hmmm, giant purple egg… and Monty’s grapes? Cookie, would you like to recline on this comfy couch and have a chat?
Okay, I’m clearly in the minority here, but I kind of liked the Power Rangers when my kids were watching them and I still have a nostalgic fondness for them. Yeah, the movie wasn’t the best, but it had some amusing moments. The movie and TV show (like Ninja Turtles) were aimed at kids, not grown-ups. You might argue that kids deserve quality movies, just like adults. Well, sure… why not? But kids (and teenage boys and girls) are more forgiving of a little schlock (or a lot of schlock) and just watch these movies for a little fun.
Just a quick question for Cookie: so – do you own any Power Ranger toys? Yes? Okay, then you are entitled to rate them as crappy. If not, don’t slam something you haven’t tried. It’s true that there were toy tie-ins for both the Power Rangers and Ninja Turtles, but my kids had a blast playing with them and they really weren’t bad quality-wise as action figures go. In fact, they held up darn well and we still have some of those “collectibles” in boxes in the basement waiting to be played with should my kids ever have kids of their own.
And speaking of collectibles – doesn’t a certain comeone have a thing for supervillain action figuires? So how are those different from Power Ranger toys?
Okay, I’m going to go back to my corner now and hum the Power Ranger theme. Go, go Power Raaangers!
I’m learning that Cookie has a drinking problem AND has violent tendencies.
Did you see the specs for the new Microsoft tablet? It has USB ports! Sadly, it will be months before the release. 🙁
I enjoyed the movie when I was six, in fact I watched it so many times that I knew the likes off by heart. But I have not seen it for like 15 years, may be I will watch it again one day or may be not and let my child hood memory stay intact.
1.5!!!! THAT’S IT, WE ARE DONE HERE. NEVER AGAIN.
I know it’s a couple of days late, but the month says July, and not June. Just thought I’d point it out in case it messes up the archives.
I will never watch this movie. Love ya Cookie, but yeah, no.