March 4, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Dark Knight!

Tree tings monster hate most in dis world: injustice, poverty, and movies dat run more den two hours.  Unless film be based on musty Russian novel, it have no business being so long.  Seriously!  Your movie be about a guy running around town in a cape punching people. It not exaktly Anna Carnita or Dr.…

February 25, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Hellboy II: The Golden Army!

Monster pleasantly surprised by first Hellboy so, of course, me expeckt less of de same from de sekwel becuz, after all, it be a sewkwel. Remember Hangover II?  Blues Brothers 2000?  Citizen Kane II: The Quickening?  But Hellboy II: The Golden Army out-surprise de first Hellboy.  It a movie wit even more heart, even more…

February 18, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Hancock!

Monster not professional writer so not in position to offer advice to whoever wrote dis movie, but me can't help but feel it obviously a bad idea to change direktion and tone of a skript one hour into its 90 minute running time.  Which be de case wit Hancock. We introduced to our anti-hero, Hancock.…

February 11, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Incredible Hulk (2008)!

This movie be improvement over first Hulk film de way a bad cold be improvement over Type A influenza.  In retrospekt, you not want to subject yourself to either but, hey, in dis case beggars Supermovie of de Week Club reviewers can't be choosers.  Still, whereas first movie be uniformly stoopid-ridikulous throughout, dis Hulk movie start…

February 4, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Iron Man!

Monster not want to sound sexist, but Iron Man be waaaaay more fun and exciting den sekwel Iron Lady. Movie open on rich industrialist playboy Tony Stark, a guy who be seeing more girly action den Kermit during his Muppet Show days! But during grand tour of Afghanistan, his military convoy attacked (see, dis why…

January 28, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Superhero Movie!

Imagine mash-up of first two Spiderman movies and original X-Men movie but MUCH less hilarious.  Dat pretty much sum up dis tired time-waster.On to monster's review...ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZOld lady fart.A lot!ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZDe End.Verdikt: On de one hand, movie in focus for much of its 82 minute running time; on de other hand...everyting else.Rating: 1 parody chocolate chippee…

January 21, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Underdog!

Bad!  Bad doggy movie.  It lie down and play dead for almost one hour and twenty two minutes!. Me know, me know.  "Come on, Monster.  It be a kidz movie!  Turn off your brain and just settle for dis crap entertainment.  Your expectashuns should be lower."  But monster ask "Why?".  Sky High be a kidz…

January 14, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer!

Benign and inoffensive.  Dat pretty much sum up dis movie.  On de one hand, it not sink to craptastic lows of first FF movie; on de other hand, it never quite reach de lofty heights of mediocrity either. Reed Richards and Sue Storm be in love and want to get married. Meanwhile, silver alien on…

January 7, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Spiderman 3!

As rule of thumb, you know you in for crappy viewing experience when SUPERHERO movie you watching kick off wit MUSIKAL NUMBER.  Let just say dat, after sitting thru rest of dis film, monster wasn't any Less Miserables.  Whew!  Dis movie be messier den Snuffalufagus eating Cantonese chow mein.  It meander and hopscotch from one…

December 24, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Zoom!

Dis be less a movie and more an interminable collektion of lame musical montage sekwences punctuated by occasional attempts at a plot, charakter development and, worst of all, humor. It say a lot about dis catastrophe dat de most interesting part of Zoom be opening five minute info-dump voice-over dat explain how two brothers, Zoom…

December 17, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Lightspeed!

Dis movie suck more den Grover's aunt Tildy at a Shriner's convention. Movie begin wit guy walking down a dark alley where he encounter shaky creep hiding under dirty blanket.  To most sane people, dis be invitation to skedaddle.  But not dis guy.  He stand and watch as - in movie's most horrifying sequence -…

December 10, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews My Super Ex-Girlfriend!

Dis movie reminiscent of monster's ex-girlfriend, Mona Hildeberger. One time, she get so mad after me use dishwasher to dry socks dat she spike monster's L'Oreal shampoo wit Nair hair remover.  For two months while wait for fur to grow back, me kept getting mistaken for member of Blue Man Group.  Very unpleasant memories. Fortunately,…

November 26, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews X-Men: The Last Stand!

On de one hand, dis movie not as good as de original or sekwel.  On de other hand, it not make monster want to vomit, kick in his t.v., or punch someone in de nards. Movie pick up where last one left off.  Jean Grey be dead and X-Men be in mourning.  Cue cornball cliche…

November 19, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Sky High!

Monster can't help but tink dat if Wonder Woman had been my high school principal, me could have accomplished so much more in life. Instead, here me is doing movie reviews to help support my cookie habit.  But me suppose it could be worse.  Monster could be reviewing Elektra again.  Instead, dis week, me watch…

November 12, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Fantastic Four (2205)!

Okay, yes, dis be garbage movie but viewer have to keep in mind dat it made in 1994 by schlock producer Roger Corman for miniscule budget and film never meant to be released...Wait.  What?  Dis NOT de Roger Corman crapfest but de 2005 $100 million budget version?  Are you sure? Hmmm.  Monster just checked and…