March 22, 2018: Is It Time For Cookie Monster To Come Out Of Retirement?

Welp (Honestly?  I just like saying “Welp!”), I think it’s high time I brought resident film critic Cookie Monster back from extended vacation so he can start catching up on his superhero movie reviews.  It’s been over three years since we last heard from our blue-furred Richard Roeper (not to be confused with the real blue-furred Richard Roeper).  At first blush, it would appear the last movie he reviewed, Kick-Ass 2, may have done him some lastingdamage [“VERDIKT: If you loved de first movie, you’ll hate dis one. But if you hated de first movie, you probably won’t hate dis one as much.”], but in truth, all the blame lies with Avengers: Age of Ultron. According to Cookie in his farewell letter dated October 29, 2014, sitting through Avengers: Age of Ultron “be like watching somebuddy else play video games for tree and half hours!”.  Which is pretty damning when you consider the movie’s runtime was just a shade over two.

Anyway, with Black Panther out and Deadpool 2 poised to hit theaters in a couple of months, I figured now is the time to cajole Monster into getting back in the critic’s seat.  And, of course, there’s Avengers: Infinity War that looks like the perfect movie for anyone with a PhD in Marvel Comics (Everyone else need not apply).  Of course, getting back in the saddle will mean writing up a review of Age of Ultron which, given the fact it’s been almost three years since he saw it, may require a repeat viewing – which would be akin to asking him to relive prom night with Grover’s cousin Shanice.  But, hey, let’s see.  Stranger things have happened.

Prom night with Grover’s cousin Shanice, for one.

Meanwhile, you can check out all of Cookie Monster’s past movie reviews here including his thoughts on…

Man of Steel:  …dis be filmic equivalent of having to attend an uncle’s funeral at Six Flags. Wit unbelievable romantic B story tacked on.

Superman Returns: …more boring den Fozzie Bear’s off-off-off Broadway production of “Old Coronation Street Episodes”.

CatwomanVerdikt: Dis movie a CATastrophe.  Get it it?  She a cat!

The Incredible Hulk: Verdikt: If dis movie was a frat house, it be Pi Krappa Gamma.

Meanwhile, it looks like them marbles (consult previous blog entry for reference) have rounded the bend and are headed towards the finish line.  Comet is still out in front but Reflektor is closing fast.  Looks like I may need to start binging horror movies.


13 thoughts on “March 22, 2018: Is it time for Cookie Monster to come out of retirement?

  1. Before Cookie starts reviewing, perhaps he could nail down his rating system. I would assume sugar free cookies are the lowest and chocolate chip cookies are the highest?

    Love his thoughts, btw.

  2. Black Panther is already out here in the US. Not in Canada?

    I can’t believe it’s been three years since we saw Cookie Monster! Boy that went fast.


    I loved reviewing those movies. Tell Cookie to make sure he gives us time to screen the movie too if we want to!

  4. Heroes with a special powers batlle against a Bad other heroes to save the world = All Marvell and DC films ….I’m Bored

    Bring Back Dark Matter
    Bring back Big Scale Monsters
    Bring Back Aliens invasions (The invaders 2018 edition)

  5. Hi Joe
    Has it been 3 years already. I used to love Cookie Monsters take on movies, Didn’t often agree with him, but loved them nonetheless. 🙂


  6. cookie? did somebody say COOOKIE!?? <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

    me wants cookie tooo!

    o' boy – o' boy – o' boy!

    Pace maker don't fail me now! 😀

    *dashes off to kitchen to bake several fresh batches of chocolate chip
    for Monster's grand homecoming party*

  7. Yeah, don’t let the Monster relax too much and lose his brain. Put the family size bag of cookies down and get back to work.

  8. Wow, has it REALLY been three years since CM paid a visit? It’s past due time.

    If you’d like any horror movie recommendations, say the word. I’ve seen all of them. Yes, really. I’ve seen all of the horror movies. =)

  9. Cookie also needs to review The Crown and everything else he’s been streaming from the comfort of his palazzo in Lake Cuomo. .

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