Akemi walked back into the apartment and announced: “I threw the garbage down the garbage shooter.”

“Garbage chute,”I corrected her.

“Garbage shooter,”she corrected herself.

“No,”I said. “Garbage shoot.  Not shooter.”

“Ah,”she said, realization dawning.  “Garbage shoot because it shoots the garbage downstairs.  I’M the garbage shooter.”

“No,”I said, my frustration mounting.  “It’s garbage chute.  C-H-U-T-E.  Not garbage shoot.  S-H-O-O-T.”

She paused to consider.  Then: “How do you say when a soccer player kicks the ball at the net?”

“He shoots – ”

“So like I shoot the garbage downstairs – ”

“No, but – ”

“Shoots.  Shoots.”

“C-H-U-T…” But she was no longer listening, focused as she was on miming the various shots she was taking on some imaginary net.

Anyways, Akemi wanted me to display for you this (presently) one-of-a-kind Suji t-shirt she had custom-made as a test sample.

If anyone would like this unisex medium black tee with a 17 inch width, 26.25 inch length, and 12 inch sleeve center back in 100% cotton, just leave a note in the comment section and I’ll have Suji randomly pick someone by tomorrow’s blog entry.

Bonne chance!

 

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Peter J
Peter J

Brilliant.Well she sounds pretty logical to me and logic always wins over linguistic common sense.

Linda Cadigan
Linda Cadigan

Lemme chute you a message 🤣

KathyC
KathyC

Awww I love Akemi-isms. The English language doesn’t always make sense to us native speakers either.

Margo-Lea
Margo-Lea

I feel a Suji Shirt tongue twister coming on, but I’ll try to control myself.

My 2 favorite lines from Division Street, a play I saw at the Mark Taper Forum:

That takes the cupcake! And… now you will feel the grapes of my wrath!

Please, God’s of random, let Suji choose me!

Danine Dolphin
Danine Dolphin

Random Suji shirt for Akemi to shoot to me through a mail chute? Yes please!

OgreMkV

I’m not sure which language is harder to learn. Japanese has a metric ton of cultural baggage. But then English has a metric ton of cultural baggage from a dozen different cultures.

aluncox

When, if ever, are you going to realise that womens logic is different ot mens. added to that there are cultrual differences that you have to get used to. Akemi rocks, get used to it and enjoy. Thats why you like her so much!

Colleen #TeamRaza #TeamPsych (@dr2red)

Chute or shoot it is damn cute. I would love the Suji shirt please.

Rebekah
Rebekah

Omg! I would looove to have that shirt! Technically akemi could still be the shooter of garbage down the chute :p so I guess I’m on her side, lol!

arcticgoddess

I’d give my son, David the T-shirt. He has Aspergers and is a T-shirt collector.

BoltBait

Joe, you need to incorporate all of these Akemi-isms into your next TV project. They are so honest and precious–comedy gold.

Duptiang
Duptiang

oh the fun with English; the homonym and homograph. I remember my time in Thailand when I was making a visit to Phuket, that’s poo not foo as Thai pronunciation and Anglicized spelling diverge, from my home village of Trang (that is pronounced D-r – ong like in song) was at a bar and talking to a fellow citizen when I was talking about Thai and the many accents may cause different meanings like cow… Cow!, cow?, cow. coww.. meaning they, rice, white, etc. It made her laugh and caused her drink to go up her nose.

Line Noise
Line Noise

Doesn’t Japanese have homonyms?

Line Noise
Line Noise
JeffW
JeffW

So I just wasted about twenty minutes looking up the derivations of ‘chute’ (vulgate latin and middle french if you’re interested) and ‘shoot’ (old english/germanic in origin)…I find Akemi’s english language travails to be educational in a number of different ways. smile

As for the Suji tee-shirt, I could see a number of situations where Suji sticking her tongue out at people would be an appropriate response. Especially for those people who never thank anyone for holding the door open for them… smile

dasndanger
dasndanger

When I was a kid the Vietnam War was going on and I would hear news of guerrillas coming out of the forest and attacking soldiers. Only, I thought they were talking about actual…ya know… gorillas. razz Now, I could be forgiven for such a mistake, seeing as how I was a kid and all. However…I didn’t realize that they were actually people until I saw the word ‘guerrilla’ written out many years later, when I was about 20 years old. Up to that time I thought war was fought with trained gorillas. razz razz

dasndanger
dasndanger

Akemi can probably relate to this fella…

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-yjx3AVS5OU

das (rhymes with ass…)

Shana
Shana

Ah, the joys of the English language. Also sign me up for the random drawing.

Elminster
Elminster

Hi Joe
Put me in for a shot at the T-Shirt.
And thank you and Prodigy Pictures for the wonderful sweater I got today.

comment image

Elminster

sylvia
sylvia

Sweet Dark Matter item there. And it would go well over a Suji T shirt!
Cool Dude!

Kathlene
Kathlene

Nice shirt, even nicer dog, but are those fine bottles of Suntory behind you?

sylvia
sylvia

Will Akemi consider other sizes?
cause….the picture has generated a big “want” in my head.
But alas…I ain’t a medium…sigh.
Just asking…just in case.

Paul Young
Paul Young

I’d wear that Suji shirt; you could definitely sell ’em smile

Ponytail
Ponytail

Akemi is right, English is dumb. That reminds me I’m suppose to be learning Spanish in my retirement.

ceresis64

Suji sticking her tongue out is the best response to the nuances of the English language! lol

pennlynn

Love you guys! That shirt is on fleek….too much?

gavia
gavia

Omg I ABSOLUTELY want that t-shirt! It would go SO WELL with my suji pin!