Boy oh boy, nothing keeps a television writer real and grounded like network notes two days AFTER a rewrite has been completed.  Just when they’re regaining that old self-confidence, growing presumptuously organized and focused on the next script, the email fairy appears bearing tidings of discomfort and requests for a serious rethinking of the script’s main villain.  And so, rather than moving on to my rewrite of episode #6, I’ll be rewriting my rewrite of episode #2 instead.  Of course, as my writing partner Paul pointed out, we only have ourselves to blame.  Unlike countless disorganized productions that barely have a script beyond the season opener by the time they go to camera, with a week to go before main unit starts shooting, we have eight scripts out there in various stages of development. We’re well ahead of the game which is great for the production as it gives us plenty of time to prep – and even greater for anyone inclined to give notes because there is PLENTY of time for that as well.

It’s crunch time, ladies and gentlemen.  Paul is up to his eyeballs in prep on episode #1 and I’ve got a plethora of rewrites on tap (#2, #3, #5, #6, and #7) – with prep looming for my first episode as well.  The challenge, as always, is to address the concerns of the various players (and in the case of this production, I count a little over a half dozen) in way that satisfies their requests yet keeps the scripts tight and, most importantly, produceable given the established budgetary parameters.  No mean feat.

Today, I took a break from all the Transporter script work and relaxed by working on the fourth and final script (of the opening four-issue arc) of my upcoming comic book series, Dark Matter, an SF space opera that, at its thematic core, is all about revelations, redemption, and revenge.  My editor at Dark Horse, Patrick Thorpe has been keeping me updated on the developing artwork, forwarding me everything from rough layouts to pencils (to a color version of the first issue’s awesome cover).  Artist Garry Brown continues to astound.  And no wonder. Just check out some of his past work…

Head on over and peruse the rest of Garry’s gallery here:

Dark Matter will be hitting the shelves January of 2012.

A little over 500 votes cast in the Name Trevor’s Baby Contest and, sadly, my favorite choice – Oprah – trails badly with a paltry 32 votes.  It’s neck and neck for the other four entries – Trouble, Spearmint, Eufemia, and Muff – as we head to the finish line.  Head on over to this entry (June 30, 2011: Vote for one of the finalists in our Name Trevor’s Baby Contest! And other stuff!) and cast your vote.  I’ll be announcing the winning name later this week.  What I initially took for excitement on the part of the soon-to-be-dad, Trevor, our Executive Producer’s Assistant, turned out to be apprehension and a smattering of fear at the prospect of how his wife will react.  Just in case he’s having second thoughts, I had our legal department actually make the acceptance of the baby-naming a part of his job requirement.

Another reminder: Read volume #1 of Sweet Tooth by Jeff Lemire!  Discussion on the trade paperback begins Monday!

Finally, I would appreciate it if everyone took a moment to post their porn star name after following this simple formula: Simply take the name of your first pet and follow it with the name of the street you grew up on.  Smokey Bordeaux, at your service.

And finally-finally – no matter how many times I play the following video, Akemi is reduced to a puddle of tears.  I feel bad for the kid too.  I think she was expecting a bicycle…

69 thoughts on “July 2, 2011: Crunch time and comics!

  1. That artwork is incredible. We’ll be sure to check it out when it comes out. My name is kind of boring–Puff Valmire. LOL I’ve seen that video with the kids. I agree with you. I think the kid was expecting something else.

    Have a good night!!!

  2. Hi Joe 🙂
    You did promise to tell us more about SGA Extinction …. what about it ?!?!?!


  3. Well I grew up on a farm … so it could be Rover Farm?? or when we finally moved into town Rover Cross.

    I’m with Akemi … puddle of tears.

  4. Po Po Pennsylvania Ave,,,,sorry thats as good as it gets, haha..

    —-Will the comic be available in book stores ,like bam or barnes or even amazon, do you know>>>??

  5. Well, the cat’s name was Commodore Remington, so I’m not sure how the rules apply there.

  6. Pinky West Jackson
    Icky Highway 62

    I was a youngest kid so what qualifies as “my” pet varies.

    I asked my kids what they thought of the unwrapping a military dad video. My daughter said, “I wish kids could be presents.” My son said, “did you know you can make a cheese sandwich in Minecraft?”

    I am familiar with the dilemma of how early to turn in your work. I’ve turned stuff in way early and just in the nick of time and, on average, the satisfaction with the final product is the same. The amount of rework requested, though, is directly proportional to how early it’s turned in. It’s quite tempting to be a nick of timer.

  7. Jake Holland.

    It would actually be a great stage name if I ever become famous, or maybe my “nom de plume” when I write my first screenplay.

    Weena Wanda is all kinds of win, though. I actually did laugh out loud on that one. Thank you.

  8. Wonderful video, so sweet. It is truly heartwarming that so many returning soldiers are greeted well and joyously and know they are appreciated. May God rest those who do not see their loved ones again.

    On another note, my elder cat is somehow in diabetes remission. No more insulin injections until he again tests high on blood glucose. My vet is amazed, since the cat has been a type 1 diabetic since 2005! I don’t understand, but I’m glad of it.


  9. Kitty Walnut. Well, I didn’t really ‘grow up’ on one street, as we tended to move ever four years or so, but that’s the only one that makes any sense for this. And I think my cat technically had a name at one point… I think it might have been Shee-ra or something ridiculous like that, but since it was a male cat, that never made much sense (hey, I was like four), and we always just called it Kitty (or Cat).

  10. going to need a new formula for those porn names. Napoleon Walker? that should 0 out video sales, even if the prospective buyers haven’t seen me yet. If they had…well, at least that would give the right wingers a promo for celebicy.
    Busy is good. Being ahead is good. Keep up the good work.

  11. 1. @ dioxholster – I sure wish that dummy could stand in my stead for the root canal I’m gonna need in the next few weeks. 😛

    2. @ Lewis – As I understand it, there is a market for those with your porn name… 😉

    3. @ Bryan M. White – I went with Trouble because I figured then the kid would be named after Joe. 🙂

    4. @ 2cats – I thought they were singing sperm at first… 😛

    5. @ Thornyrose – Wow – that’s pretty amazing. If you close your eyes you really think you’re hearing the instruments. 🙂

    6. @ Joey – Uh-oh. That vid is making Akemi cry? You know what that means! Mothering instinct is kicking in! 😉

    7. Porn name? Prissy Stevens for me, and Sooty Terrace for Mr. Das. 😀


  12. Tiffany Serpentine here – I guess that one would work, though it should really be Tiffy NW 60th if you count my first address!

    Hi Joe,

    I’m still high from the chocolate hit you gave us yesterday, mmmmmmmyummy. Then a tear-jerker vid today?! Trying to make me bi-polar? Sorry about the heavy lifting on the rewrites, but glad Dark Matter could steal you away for a bit – can hardly wait for its release! How is Jelly faring? Has she had another treatment lately? Poor sweetie, getting older sucks!

    Smiles, Julie

    PS Did you see Paul’s new blog?

  13. I agree it would be cool to tell people you have to go “pick up Oprah” or “meet Oprah for dinner,” that’s a real plus that Trevor should consider. But I’m still hoping Eufemia wins because its so lyrical. They don’t make Disney key chains with Oprah or Eufemia on ’em, so they’re both equally unique and special. If I was Trevor I’d be doing backflips of joy from having so many great names chosen by obliging strangers.

    The Batman art is very cool; Batman bleeds Gotham. Much more complex than your typical comic cover. I’m looking forward to Dark Matter.

  14. Oops, forgot my porn name, it would by Samantha Lefevre. Ew, now I feel dirty.

  15. PS: Joe…your porn name sounds delicious! 😀

    I was trying to think of the rest of my family – My brother would be Pretty Boy Stevens, and my sister Jingles Stevens. And if I remember correctly, my mom would be Butchy Central… 😆 I don’t think dad had any pets, which is probably a good thing. 😛


  16. Kiki Hopewell-Wertsville
    Freya Rileyville
    Sport Route 607

    The family had three pets when I came along, and the road had three designations over the decades.

  17. I’d be more comfortable with the “nom de plume” category, :blush: but the name might still cause a stir, because it sounds like someone else’s lately:

    Pepper Middleton

    Those welcome home videos get to me, too. If it were my guy coming back, I’d be a serious mess, but a very happy one.

    Thought you’d like SOMA. 🙂 I laughed out loud too when one of the gals had you pegged. Hee! Awesome blog. Hello to Mai and Diana. The store is incredible and each bite looks like a piece of art; would feel guilty eating it. Chocolate is off-limits to me now because of caffeine issues, but boy, that didn’t keep me from poring over the display case photos. Whew, those with the feuillettes and the orange chocolates, wow. Were they made with Grand Marnier? Enjoy them for me/us!!!

  18. Lovely vid…

    Michael and Chris did the porn star name thing at Chevron7…Michael was Boots Murray…trying to remember Chris’ and can’t but it was a goody

    Mine is Spitfire Pond…

    Kriss 🙂

  19. @ das-

    the actual street name was Lake Blvd., so it’d really be PeePee (Lake) Blvd.

    …I was trying to think of various Comic book Characters, but the ones who had pets are far & few! Superman had his dog Krypto, but what was the street name? In the 80’s Hal Jordan had tiny pet star/alien that followed him around named Itty (probably not the best first name for a porn star tho!).

  20. Joe….you will not believe this…I’m almost embarrassed…”Misty Woodwacker”

    You know, it’s Karma. You will continue to have problems with your main villain until you cast Frank Cassini for the role.


  21. “Tippy Marr”? Not exactly a studly name.

    That video reminds me that I need a new grill!

  22. Here is a good video to show Akemi,

    I just picked up the Song of Fire and Ice books, aka Game of Thrones, from Chapters today. Buy 3 get 1 free, plus irewards and i got all 4 books for $25, pretty sweet deal. The sale ends monday so get in there, applies to all books and magazines.

  23. Artwork is killer – I will have next January circled in red on my calendar, or whatever the bleep iCloud lets me do with my calendar…

    Porn name – Tiger Red Oak
    Interesting for a small, pale female

  24. Mister Red Regulus. I think, I was raised in Navy housing and moved a lot. There may have been an H street ….

    At least I’m a rocket!

    Dad was with air squadrons, I don’t really recall going to meet the carrier coming in, he was usually working or had flown in early. I do remember the night he was able to go to the Daddy Daughter Dance at church, but was called in to base on duty before the first dance. Sad.

  25. Alert Kaunaoa – we aim to please…uhhhh, hmmm, not gonna get a lot of interest there.

  26. my copy of Sweet Tooth just shipped, I meant to order sooner. Also World War Z(zombies are LITERALLY takin over culture, Pride & Prejudice & zombies!) & The Speed of Dark(sounded good! Thanks for the love of Beckett & Joe)


  27. I had another name pop into my mind last night. I know it is too late, but I thought it would be fun to share: Futura

  28. You know who made a surprisingly disturbing villain to me: Jonny Lee Miller. He went from one of my favorites in Eli Stone, to creeping the hell out of me in Dexter last season. Totally threw off the Eli Stone image. And Vance & Miller could have a reunion.

    As far as my porn name, that gets rough because I don’t remember our first pet’s name and we moved so much. So if we consider the first pet that I called “mine”, which was when I was an adult and combine it with my first-ever address, then you get a very boring name:

    Sam Bedford

    Although the word “bed” is in there.

  29. @A little over 500 votes cast

    Wow Joe, you have a lot of people lurking your entrys lol.

    Anyway your script stuff sounds fun, that said once you have the episodes filmed and you’re watching them, you know it’l be worthwhile all that effort you’re making.

  30. Oh and I don’t have a clue what street I grew up on =/ Sorry I would post if I knew lol

    @Dark Matter will be hitting the shelves January of 2012.

    Any date in January inparticular?

  31. Hey, just found out, the Space Channel is going HD in time for the new Torchwood. Gawd, I gotta go get the wide screen TV and talk to Rogers. And under a week to do it!


  32. I haven’t posted before, but I just couldn’t resist:

    Snowflake Matilija

    Thanks for the video. My son-in-law just returned from a year in Afghanistan to my daughter and 3 grandkids. Lots of tears all around.

    Desert Blossom-by-the Sea

  33. Jinx Fairway here.. LOL

    Those surprise homecoming videos always get me too — the little girls always start crying their eyes out!

    I am going to have to see if there is a gourmet chocolate place in Atlanta — those pictures are making me crazy…

  34. My porn name would be….Peekaboo Rockwell! Oh my God my mother’s gonna kill me for how truly bad that sounds….And isn’t there a porn star with that name back in 70s already?;-)

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