Here’s a suggestion: Don’t pay attention to the suggestions made my anyone who works in a bookstore. Between those ubiquitous staff picks and the disquietingly animated advice offered by aimless aisle-wanderers, you’d think they’d get it right at least some of time. The sad truth is that, for the life of me, I can’t even think of a single book recommended to me by an employee that I actually enjoyed. Their choices have been so consistently staggeringly awful that I’ve been tempted to have them name their most despised novel and go with that.
Also, a special request to publishers and authors. Enough with the horror/classic mash-ups. Please, spare us:
The Heart is a Lonely Vampire Hunter
A Farewell to Arms and Legs and Heads
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Troll
The Way of All Flesh Eaters
Native Son of Dracula
Harry and the Henderson the Rain King
Tender is the Night of the Living Dead
Howard the Duck’s End
A Room with a View and a Closet Hiding a Guy with a Hatchet
Bride of Frankenstein’s Head Revisited
The Old Man and the Sea Monster
Uncle Tom’s Cabin in the Woods
The Grapes of Wrath of Khan
Sophie’s Choice Cuts
The Adventures of Augie March of the Zombie Penguins
The Postman Always Rings Twice To Make Sure You’re Not Home Then Crawls in Through the Back Window and Lies in Wait for your Return.
Nicholas T. writes: “will Martin Wood be directing SGU in season 2?”
Answer: Nope. Martin has his hands full with the latest season of Sanctuary.
Nicholas T. also writes: “I have a number of books on dreams and the brain that I would like to mail to you. How would I address them?”
Answer: You can send them to me c/o Stargate Universe, 2400 Boundary Road, Burnaby, BC, V5M 3Z3.
Jim writes: “I think what I am concerned about is if including Atlantis characters only makes you do some minor changes to Evolution, then are the characters just going to be superfluous in the SGU guest appearances?”
Answer: I think you mean Extinction, not Evolution. The changes made to the script will have to do with the timing of events (essentially the set-up) and won’t influence the heart of the story.
Kymm writes: “Why do you call Martin Gero Golden Boy?”
Answer: Because his smile lights up a room like a sunny morning. Why else?
John writes: “I was wondering, are you sick of answering questions about the Stargate movies?”
Answer: If there was something to report, I’d report it. Still, I don’t mind informing fans that there’s no information – unless I get a “What’s the latest on the movies?” question on the day after I’ve already fielded the exact same question.
Ben writes: “I was curious, will there be any more green-themed episodes, or was that a one-time network thing?”
Answer: The network asked us to a green episode back in Atlantis’s fifth season, but we weren’t asked to do one last year. Instead of limiting ourselves to green, this year, I’d like to see us cover a whole host of other colors including mauve and magenta.
Annie from Freemantle writes: “Hey Joe (whenever I say that I hear Jimi Hendrix), did Jelly get a tube down her trachea when she was under? I know this can cause an irritation. With pugkids, I know they have breathing issues so maybe they put a tube down to help with respiration.”
Answer: I believe that’s exactly what happened.
Rex Carter writes: “Hi Joe in Season 2 of SGU:
1)Will we find out where Destiny is its spaceial co-ordinates and what Galaxy they are in now just in case Rodney finds a case of zpms somewhere so they can send the General Hammond to catch up with Destiny?
I mean are they in some galaxy we cant see from here or on any astrological maps?
2) If the SGC dialed Destiny if they find a power source and sent heavy equipment through would the equipment fly out of Destiny’s gate and smash into the wall and be pulverized or okay to use still like a puddle jumper or could such pilot of jumper fly away in time and land on the floor?
3) Was there ever any trouble with the MALPs crashing into the stargates on either sg-1 of sga going through the gate and directly into the wall on the other side of the gate props where it was heading?
4) About ZPMs theorectically how many zpms would be needed to dial Destiny even for a minute connection?”
Answers: 1) Destiny is too far to play catch up with at this point.
2) Anything coming through the gate will be a projectile, but it would be traveling so fast that it would strike the far wall. It could, however, sustain damage unless the crew was prepared for it and took steps to soften its landing.
3) No, but in this case we’re dialing a nine chevron address.
4) A lot.
Adam White writes: “Hi I have a pug related question for you. Our little man Ugg suffered two fits last night within 3 hours he is now at a specialist running tests where he had no further fits in about 16 hours. Both times he fitted It was as he woke up so kind of hoping it was a fluke or epilipsy for obvious reasons. Any ideas or have your herd ever suffered similar?”
Answer: I haven’t had a similar experience with my pugs. Do keep us posted on Ugg’s progress.
Negolith writes: “I made it easy because I’ve noticed in the past that you have difficulty with honest criticism….”
Answer: I have no problem with honest criticism, but I do take issue with immature comments and general douchebaggery.
Negolith also writes: “Yeah, those horrible irredeemable whiners out in fandom – they follow the shows, buy the DVD’s, the tie-in novels, the merchandise, shell out big bucks for conventions, develop a passion for characters that make them spend hours of time doing videos or artwork or fiction that they get no compensation for….”
Answer: Sorry, but the fact that you’re a fan doesn’t excuse infantile behavior that would be considered socially inept, even downright psychotic, outside of the cozy, cocoon-like shelter of the internet.
Nani writes: “One more thing… So, now SGA is being revived after you told us time and time again that it would NEVER happen???”
Answer: Hey to break it to you, but it aint being revived.