Since my father was a diabetic, the prospect that the disease ran in my family was something that would give me pause now and again. Never during dinner of course, and certainly not while I was eating my double desserts, but lying in bed some nights I would wonder. Could I develop it? Was I at risk? Did I already have it? It had been more than a few years since my last full physical and if I did have it, I certainly wouldn’t know it. Unless I was failing to notice the symptoms. Well, I had been feeling a little rundown of late. Was that a sign of low blood sugar? Or was it a sign that my body was feeling the effects of my waking up at 6:00 a.m. every morning in order to do a high-intensity cardio and weight work-out? What about my occasions of blurred vision? Was that a sign that the disease was damaging my retinas? Or was it a sign that I just woke up and hadn’t yet rubbed the sleep out of my eyes? Or what about my frequent trips to the bathroom? Was it a sign that my kidneys had been affected? Or was it a sign that maybe drinking 4 litres of water (roughly 100 fluid ounces)a day was overdoing it? Well, there was only one way to know for sure and, sometime last month, Fondy picked up one of those take-home test-yourself blood-glucose meters. A normal reading is in the 4 to 7 range and I know a friend whose initial result, at a little over 20, sent him to emergency. I was anxious to say the least. Anxious, yes, but not altogether eager to know. And certainly not with my chocolate party looming. I mean, seriously. Could you think of a bigger downer? And so, the chocolate party came and went and that blood-glucose meter sat in Fondy’s drawer, gathering dust. And as time went on, I grew increasingly worried. Again, worried enough to worry, but really not worried enough to bring myself to test my blood and either a) put my mind at ease or b) confront a potential health problem. It was always “Not yet! Not yet! I’ve special-ordered chocolates!”. Or “Not yet! Not yet! I have to finish the truffles before they go bad!” Finally, the other night, Fondy had had enough. She tested herself first. 5. As I said, a blood sugar level reading of 4-7 is normal. “Okay, your turn,”she announced. “Not yet! Not yet!”I protested. It had been a multiple dessert night and I was sure that would skew the readings. It was almost midnight and if it was bad news it would keep me up all night. Plus, I was squeamish and didn’t want to bleed! She practically had to sit on me to get the blood from my finger. “Don’t worry,”she assured me. “I won’t tell you until tomorrow.” She slipped the chip into the reader and seconds later – beep – got the result. She was stonefaced. “What’s it at?”I asked, wanting to know but not really. “Do you really want to know?”she asked. “Yes!” She turned the reader around. 4.1 I had to take another look just to be sure it wasn’t 41. Yup. 4.1 I was normal. Nutella shots for everyone!
So, okay, maybe it shouldn’t have been all that surprising. After all, even though we do eat out every night and I do enjoy a dessert (sometimes two) on occasion, I pursue a fairly healthy lifestyle: working out every day, starting each morning with a bowl of low-fat yogurt, All-bran, protein powder, and fruit, avoiding most bad carbs. Still, I’m a bit of a hypochondriac so I suppose I need something new to worry about. High blood-pressure?! No. I checked mine while I was in Montreal. Perfectly normal. High cholesterol?! No, again, last time I checked that was normal too. Hmmm. Hey, what about Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconioses? Can anyone give me the symptoms?
Can anyone even pronounce it?
By the way, I’d like to take a moment to welcome the slew of Hungarian fans who seem to have discovered my blog the other day. Isten hozott!
Pics: Bam Bam makes a very important call, my buddy Crispy sporting his shades on a stake-out, David Nykl incognito, and a basket of tasty deep-fried garlic chicken cartilage from Zakkushi.
Q&A –
PG15 writes: “Joe, would you say you are the most snarktastic producer working on the Stargates?”
Answer: Truth be told, we’re all pretty snarky. In fact, I think both Rob and Marty G. outdo me.
Wraithkeeper writes: “When you’re writing the scripts, how do you choose names for alien technology or speech? For instance, the Goa’uld have the word Mik’ta – I’ve always been curious if that’s a play on director Andy Mikita’s name?”
Answer: Probably the worst thing about our job is having to come up with those alien names. Often, it’s just easier to bastardize a familiar name like, say, Mikita. Hey, anyone remember the Mallozian Mines from Serpent’s Grasp?
Anonymous #1 writes: “Joe, have you ever had or heard of Mountain Oysters, otherwise known as Rocky Mountain Oysters?”
Answer: Are they the same thing as Prairie Oysters? They were on the menu when I went to Pied de Cochon in Montreal but, alas, were unavailable. I believe they were out of season. Is that even possible?
Anonymous #2 writes: “Will we see the Genii in season 4?”
Answer: Possibly.
Johnny E. writes: “1. Do you have a favorite episode? 2. What was with the longer break this winter/spring?”
Answers: 1. Of the finished episodes I’ve written – Ripple Effect. Let’s see how Reunion turns out. 2. I believe it’s part of SciFi’s strategy to provide viewers with year-round original programming.
Suzotchka writes: “ You should be getting a package from the Save Elizabeth Weir campaign any day now. So be on the lookout.”
Answer: I’ll have Martin Gero open it.
Anonymous #3 writes: “Joe, there are some of us over at Gateworld who are wondering if the transparent displays used on the Atlantis sets are real or props. Could you please clarify the issue?”
Answer: I’m not sure what you’re referring to.
Lizzie a ecrit: “Est-ce que vous vous interessez aux audiences de Stargate dans les autres pays comme en france?”
Reponse: Bien sur. Si je n’etais pas interesse, je ne repondrais pas a vos questions.
Anonymous #4 writes: “Are we going to see a more vunerable or less in control shep this season?”
Answer: Some.
Linzi writes: “Thanks for answering my question and explaining that This Mortal Coil was the most challenging script for you to write. Are you pleased with the end product? Has it been a labour of love, or a thorn in your side?”
Answer: I think the script is pretty solid now and I’m really liking what Will has shot so far.
Anonymous #5 writes: “What episode of Atlantis is Zac Selwyn going to be in and did he make the final cut?”
Answer: Yes, Zach made the cut. He was actually very good. He’ll be appearing in Tabula Rasa.
Anonymous #6 writes: “I hope holding Amanda to her contract is worth it to the show…”
Answer: There was no “holding to” any contract. We simply exercised her option meaning we already had a deal in place that would allow her to continue working on Stargate – IF she wanted to. Which she did.
Crazymom writes: “Do you ever have a day when you just do not want to deal with the blog?”
Answer: Yeah. Roughly every second day.
Promogirl writes: “Do you think the internet has helped or hurt the Stargate franchises?”
Answer: I don’t know if it’s helped, but it certainly hasn’t hurt.
Herbert writes: “Michael Beach be returning in this episode as well?”
Answer: Yup. Both Michael and Mitch and their respective ships will be putting in an appearance.
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