Back in the day, my former writing partner and I would host a weekly Bad Movie Night.
Over the course of many months, we watched some truly shitty movies – but these four were the absolute worst.
Give me YOUR #BadMovieNight Lineup! pic.twitter.com/9rGUtzseOf
— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) May 8, 2020
Okay, bad news. Apparently, this pandemic and murder hornets aren’t the only things we have to worry about..
What is your prediction for the Big Bad Things?
I’m going to say…
Hypnoworms! They’re malicious internet viruses disguised as memes and TikTok videos that actually contain dangerous subliminal messaging.
I was going to go with Acid Rain, but apparently that’s already taken.
Catching up on my #AGraphicNovelADay…
#AGraphicNovelADay Day 8
Midnight Vista vol. 1
19 years after the disappearance of eight year old Oliver Flores, he suddenly turns up – alive and well, and claiming to have been the victim of an alien abduction.@EliotRahal @ClaraMeath @markenglert @TaylorEspo @AfterShockComix pic.twitter.com/1yF51Hw0OV
— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) May 3, 2020
#AGraphicNovelADay Day 9
Pyongyang: A Journey In North Korea
A peek inside North Korea offered up by one of the few westerners permitted entry to the hermit kingdom.
Humorous, harrowing, and, at times, utterly bewildering. @guy_delisle Dirk Rehm, Helge Dascher @DandQ pic.twitter.com/OnMLtmPUn4
— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) May 4, 2020
#AGraphicNovelADay Day 10
The Puma Blues
A government agent lives an isolated wilderness existence, capturing mutant animals for study and reflecting on his post-apocalyptic world.
Lyrical and provocative.
Stephen Murphy, Michael Zulli, Rob Caswell, Mark Masztal@doverpubs pic.twitter.com/g09S3Vvkld
— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) May 5, 2020
13 thoughts on “May 8, 2020: Choose Your Own Disaster!”
I dunno, has asteroid impact been taken yet? That’s my bet. I have read in multiple places that the whole murder hornet thing is over hyped.
My worst movie list? Then first one that always pops to mind is “Nothing But Trouble”, with John Candy and others. The cast list read that it should be hilarious but hoo boy, what a stinker. Another is the Cloverfield Paradox, which makes it very clear why Netflix bought that mess on the cheap. I actually yelled at the TV (also see: the Mark Wahlberg version of “Planet of the Apes”). I will give a qualified horrible rating to “Thankskilling”, which had a foul mouthed, evil, immortal turkey wreaking havoc on the local teenage population. It so horrible it was kind of entertaining, though. It certainly made me laugh!
I can’t spare precious time on bad films, I watched Back to the Future and Into the Night this week, and my work is making noise about restarting soon. I’ve become an indoor cat and I only want to work from home. I looked up the theater where I snuck out to see Back to the Future and it’s still open, same wood and velvet seats. Totally worth getting yelled at to go see it back in the day.
“ What is your prediction for the Big Bad Things?”
The Aachen of SG-1’s “2010”, or a similar alien race, showing up with a proposed miracle cure (read “Trojan Horse”).
THE ICE PIRATES
I hate to name this one, as I now am friendly with its lead:
BUCK ROGERS IN THE 25TH CENTURY
Possibly the worst TV movie I’ve ever seen:
Next Big Bad Disaster??
Well, I’m hoping it’s not your new haircut
with that being the reason for not sharing the money shot of Akemi’s handy work today.
Com’on now! I wanna see the sexy new lightning bolt
that I’m sure she managed to punctiliously shave onto the right side of your head!
Bad movie night:
I think the last one i attended was 8 or so lifetimes ago.
Friends and I used to intentionally play hilariously bad movies in the background,
while hanging out, eating junk food and gossiping, during sleep over parties,
just so we could make fun of them.
They were usually movies like:
The Brain Eaters.
Plan 9 From Outer Space
I do recall some from the 70’s that were so poorly written or executed
they made me laugh out loud:
Tidal Wave.(yep. shocker, eh?! a disasterous disaster movie).
Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes.
A neighbor and I did a mini marathon rewatch of old Long Ranger episodes
a few months ago.
Oh My. I’d forgotten how absolutely corny they were.
Even the bad guys were often kinda silly, wholesome, and outright Brady-Bunchish!
Hi Yo Silver! AWAY!
If a movie is awful, I move on. Sorry! Even most of the Friday night Svengoolie and Elvira Mistress of the Dark feature movies were entertaining on some level.
As for disasters, I find the list a bit outdated.
The globalization of white supremacy has been present under the radar for a while now. Antisemitism is rampant worldwide. It just doesn’t grab much mainstream press because Jews are a minority in the American continents. Blacks have always been targeted by white societies. Racism is stronger than ever worldwide.
Biosecurity became an issue when the Reston Virus, an Ebola cousin, got loose in a government lab in Reston, Virginia – just 15 miles outside of Washington, D. C. It was eventually determined that the virus, while lethal to monkeys, was not harmful to humans. However, this was only after the viral samples were badly mishandled by several scientists. Read “The Hot Zone” or watch last year’s excellent miniseries if you want a reason to lie awake at night. It could have been a terrible disaster if the viral strain was true Ebola or one of the other hemorrhagic fevers to which humans are susceptible.
I have The Hot Zone recorded but we haven’t gotten around to watching it yet.
Joe, I forgot to ask, did you let Akemi cut your hair? If so, how did it turn out? She is so exacting that I think she could get good at it with a little practice. I’d let her cut my hair!
Am into classics, a disaster in the space fleet, the solar warden fleet top secret, non-mentioned in the MIB series. This could be triggered by a Carrington event that fries electronics on the ships not shielded by a planetary body. Below on the earth, half the planet loses everything using electronics, the other half takes advantage by expanding control over the stone age areas.
Amidst that, the survivors in the desolated areas go Mad Max, Doomsday, End of Days, cannibalism becomes common. Crashed space ships litter the landscape, cigar and triangle shapes, a number of people worship them. Initial non-Carrington area scouts show up with uv scannable health tattoos, professing to be friends, but carrying a genome specific viruses to kill off the local inhabitants.
Epoch times are ahead in that disaster scenario;)
Speaking of disasters …
Seeking a good laugh?
I just discovered the Sci fi series Avenue 5 with Hugh Laurie.
Obnoxious civilian passengers,
you definititely wouldnt want to invite to your Thanksgiving or even ThanksKilling dinner,
stuck aboard a large space tourist vessel half way to Saturns moon Titan.
A totally unprofessional crew.
An accident knocks the ship slightly off course
that has now added 3 years to the 8 week hellish luxury cruise.
And the Captain (H. Laurie) reveals his american accent is faked.
And that he’s not even a real ship captain.
The premise and dialogue is 1000 percentage points beyond absurd.
Too caloric & cholesterol filled to consume the entire season in one sitting.
I’m only halfway into episode 3 now and already experiencing a bit of a tummy ache.
Think it may be time for a nice soothing cup of tea and another cat nap before continuing.
In a nut shell … Exactly the sort of completely nonsensical distraction
i suspect most of us need right now.
footnote: “that pregnant pause is on its third trimester”
That’s on my “to watch” list. We are on season 4 of The Expanse (we BLEW those episodes; great show). Once we finish season 4, this is what we wanted to watch next but I couldn’t think of the name. Thanks for that.
Bad movies for us: Alien: Covenant, Man of the Year, Dumb and Dumber To, and Jeff and I remember walking out on a movie we went to see but neither of us could remember what movie it was. It happened maybe 10-15 years ago though.
The Next Big Bad Thing: I’ll take the apolitical path on this: The virologists who were talking about COVID-19 in January/February warned us that there is another yet-to-be-named virus that will likely make itself known in about 12-18 months. Another one of those bat-to-eating source-to-wet markets-into humans just like this one did. I can’t imagine still trying to battle COVID-19 and also now in now 7-13 months (this unnamed virus), plus the regular flu/cold viruses at all the same time.
Have to say after reading through the “experts” disaster list and a bunch of worst movies lists, I must paraphrase Walter Sobchak: fuck it, Dude. Let’s go biking.