DON’T use these around me.  You’ve been warned!

Amazeballs: This was amusing for about twelve hours back in 2009.

Redonkulous: Really?  You’re still quoting a characters from FOX’s defunct The O.C.?

Addicting: I’ve mentioned this one several times.  The word you’re looking for is addictive.

Frak: Yeah.  I get it.  You like science fiction.  And, while it may have been cool on t.v., it’s less cool in public.  Trust me.

Sweet: Especially when attempted with an Eric Cartman inflection.

OMG, LOL, and any other online short-hard incorporated into an actual conversation.

Literally: 9 times out of 10, you actually mean “figuratively”.  If it’s the 1 out of 10 times it does make sense, then it’s unnecessary.

Good for you!: I can’t imagine a more patronizing expression.

That’s what SHE said: I was willing to let this one go for duration of The Office’s run on NBC (and that was being generous since the character of Michael Scott, who popularized this phrase, left the show two years before it’s final episode), but enough is enough.

Should of, Could of, and varied improper uses of the world “of”:  It’s actually “should’ve” and “could’ve” (short for “should HAVE” and “could HAVE”).

40 thoughts on “March 19, 2014: Expressions I really hate!

  1. I dislike the following:
    1. I could care less. The correct statement is – I couldn’t care less.
    2. The incorrect usage of the letter x as in expresso. It’s espresso.
    3. The use of Arthur in place of author. I like books by this author. Arthur is an author, but this book is not written by this Arthur; it is written by this other author.
    4. Your welcome…nope. It is you are welcome or you’re welcome. Don’t use the word your unless the word following it ends in ing. For example, your welcoming of the dinner guests with freshly brewed espresso reminded me of a poorly written scene in a book by a particular author whose works about which I couldn’t care less.
    5. Knowing when to use an adverb and when to use an adjective. Though it is true that many grammatically incorrect phrases are commonplace and considered ok such as drive safe, a person needs to know when to add the ly.
    6. No problem. I’m trying to break myself of this habit and counter with a positive phrase instead such as you’re welcome or any time or I’m happy to do so. No problem is not an appropriate response to someone expressing thanks or appreciation.

  2. Personally I don’t mind the way people talk online. With the internet being what it is, people express themselves in different ways on the internet. Also virtually everyone uses ‘lol’ online. It doesn’t matter what kind of background you come from, it’s just so widely used on Twitter, facebook, everywhere really by virtually everyone.

    I’m quite casual in general when posting online.

  3. “Could of, should of”? OMG Joe! You literally have it wrong. It’s, would of, could of, should of. But good for you and bless your sweet heart. Hey, there is a lot of “frak”ing going on here in Texas. It is drilling for gas and causing earthquakes.

    The only phrase that crawls under my skin and I REFUSE to use is “reach out”. I am around way too many unnaturally nice HR people who say, “I will reach out to…., why don’t you reach out to….. could you please reach out to”….. One day I’m going to “reach out” and slap someone. LOL.

  4. My sister and I just had the conversation about “should of”. It drives us both insane. I get irritated when people don’t use adverbs. “I want that so bad!” Actually you want it badly. I’ve been hearing people pronounce supposedly as “supposably”. *shudder* That’s just wrong. Also it’s especially not exspecially. The drink is an espresso not expresso. I could go on and on but I’ll stop here. 😛

    @das the new smiley faces are not good. 🙁 I agree.


  5. Please don’t “excommunicate” me from the Cult of Joe if I occasionally slip up…🙏

  6. …And he was like, so I was like, then they were like, and I was totally like…I hope this form of verbal stupidity hasn’t made it’s way across the border. I wouldn’t like that. ; )

  7. Hey now, when I say, “Frak!”, I’m not referring to Sci-fi. I’m referring to the method of sending pressurized water deep down into the ground. I AM from Alberta, you know. Ha!

  8. I should point out that there are more people on the internet who use pour grammar than those who know how to write correctly, so complaining is a losing battle. Our written language and, therefore, our spoken language is always evolving. So, don’t waste your time being the kid with his fingers in a failing dike.

  9. What drives me nuts is when fans spell Ronon Ronin or Ronan.
    I’ve got a bunch of medical grammar pet peeves, but they probably wouldn’t make sense if you don’t know the jargon.

  10. The one that drives me crazy is “irregardless”. IT IS NOT A WORD! Well, it has been misused for so long that SOME dictionaries have started to include it, which gives me a nervous tick when I just think about that…

  11. I’d like to tack on to the end of “Should of” people either not knowing or caring how to correctly use words like “affect/effect”, “to/too/two”, “there/their/they’re” and any other similar examples. It’s not that hard people!

  12. My main bugbear is apostrophe and homophone abuse. If the phrase “They’re files are over their on there desk” doesn’t make your eyes bleed then you should go and pick up a copy of The Elements Of Style by Strunk & White.

    @arcticgoddess: I thought you were being ironic with your “pour”. (Ironically, “irony” is another thing that most people get wrong, including me.)

  13. With regards to “Should of”; it’s amazing really how many native English speakers don’t know English grammar. As a non-native English speaker I’ve had to learn English grammar “the hard way” (endless hours of studying) and I assume this is not done to the same extent in English speaking countries.

  14. G’day

    Agree with the post today Joe. They really irritate me. Sometimes I want to correct their mistakes but I cannot be bothered.

    @ Line Noise – my eyes, my eyes.

    Common now is “your” and “you’re”.
    “His” instead of “he’s” or “he is”.
    It is “i’ll” or “i will” not “ill”. That person must be unwell.
    Use the apostrophe people.

    I could go on…and on…and on……………………………….

  15. @Line Noise, tempting as it would be to be ironic, I just could not do that. But then, I could have written “then” instead of “than”. That would have been less ironic than irritating! And, for Joe’s sake, I will not add, “LOL” to the end of my sentence.

  16. I’ve got two:

    “At the end of the day” instead of just saying “Those are nice points but your opinion doesn’t count”


    “Long story short” instead of “Heads up – this is a long effing story”

  17. D’oh! My brain was hurting so much trying to type my example phrase that I messed it up! It should be “Their over they’re on there desk.”

    I’ve even seen this abomination: “Your going to hate you’reself in the morning.”

    Thinking back I realise that I used “literally” in a comment a few days ago. I hope that wasn’t what prompted your blog outburst! Of course I didn’t literally walk around Rivendell because Rivendell doesn’t exist but it’s as close as you can get!

  18. I wasn’t going to say anything, but since we’re on the subject of pet peeves…

    My biggest pet peeve is misusing “it’s” and “its” (which you did here…)

  19. I wouldn’t say “should of”, could of, etc. I say “should’a”, “could’a”. But I write more formally than I talk so I mostly wouldn’t say it here.

  20. Dammit. I just used ‘sweet’ (well…’saaaa-weeeet!’) in a post here not too long ago. I guess that was like fingernails on the blackboard to you, eh? 🙁

    GOOD. 😀

    I think – correct me if I’m wrong – but a lot of people who say ‘could of’ would probably spell it ‘could’ve’ when writing – I think. Personally, when both talking and writing, I prefer ‘could’a’ (I think it’s a South Jersey thing)…but that’s because I often write in accents/dialects. Not sure why since I canNOT speak in any accent or dialect but my own, unlike Mr. Das, who’s like living with a bloody myna bird! Have you any idea what it’s like when – right in the middle of a good snuggle – your significant other suddenly turns into Arnold Schwarzenegger? OR Chewbacca??! Ugh. 😛 Though I must admit I didn’t mind it too much when he’d slip into Todd 😉 …until he called me Sheppaaaard. 😛


  21. “That’s what SHE said…” has been around for a lot longer than The Office. It was one of my ex’s one liners. Also sometimes, “That’s what SHE said, and we both laughed.” But it wasn’t ever very funny.

    @Line Noise: yes, that makes my eyes bleed, too. I’m sort of a grammar Nazi (my daughter’s phrase). I often fret about comma usage and whether the period belongs within or outside the final quotation mark.

  22. Liberry. I live in a historically African American neighborhood turned Hood. I can accept all kinds of crazy way people use words within their own culture, I myself slip into Hick on occasion. I can not handle Liberry. I occasionally have to hold back from yelling “It’s LIBRARY!”, so as not to end up on the news.

  23. Not to be overly pedantic, but given the content of your post I think this may be relevant: I think you meant “left the show two years before its final episode“.

  24. The use of “impact” when “affect” or “effect” would be more appropriate. Using “impact” is simply lazy writing.

  25. Guess what, guess what??!

    I got a $2025.00 electric bill for last month. 😛

    Yes, it was a mistake. They read my meter wrong (by 10,000+ kWh!). Still, it may take up to two months to correct. Amazing how quickly they can ask for the money, while it takes forever to give it back. 🙄

    Also…something I don’t understand…

    When I call people to do business (insurance, electric, phone, satellite, etc), I always start the call off with a cheery “Hello, how are you today?!” – just to get the call off on the right foot. I am amazed at how many people give me attitude back, usually by ignoring my greeting and grumpily asking, ‘can I help you?’. Not all – some are very cheerful in return and I can’t tell you how many times people thank me for calling because I made them laugh or – in some cases – shared my entire life story. 😛 Customer service reps from the southern states are usually the best, though I’ve had a few good ones from the heartland, too. I wonder why some people respond rather negatively to a cheerful greeting. Are they cynical, perhaps a bit shell shocked by previous customers? Or are they just grumpyarses in real life, regardless? Or maybe they think I’m a telemarketer, or something? Perhaps I should of been a bit less redonkulously cheerful, eh? 😉


  26. I wrote a web forum back in 2006 and, literally, one of the first things I did was add a word filter.
    Not for swear words.. Nope.. I did it so that it’d change “should of, could of and would of” to have’s instead!
    I literally hate that.
    It’s like, literally, the worst thing in the hole whirled.

  27. Did you know that shit is a three syllable word here? Just throwing that out there. No reason….. 🙂

  28. Those emoticons looks weird. Let me see what shock looks like. 😯 How about eye rolling? 🙄

    Hope you get your bill reversed soon Das!

  29. Agreed on all points. And can I add the misuse of the word “presently”, which in its original, and in my opinion correct, meaning is “in the immediate future, but not now”. So many people use it to mean “at present”, that I’m about to give up that fight, unfortunately. It still grinds on my ears every time I hear it used that way, though.

  30. @Should of, Could of

    I’m guilty of this sometimes, but that’s mostly a case of not proof reading a lot of what I write here before posting. Sometimes the odd mistake or three slips through lol.

  31. I’m with you on “good for you”. I’m also with Jenny above: “no problem” drives me nuts! It’s as though those people made the original statement solely for their own validation (i.e. “you look nice!” “thank you!” “no problem”) or at least need the last word. I admit to saying redonkulous…but isn’t it kind of like someone born in California near the beach always saying some cliche catchphrase? I kind of grew up (er, the formative teen years) with The OC and it just planted itself into my lingo.

  32. @Sparrow_hawk: I, too, fret about commas. The computer programmer in me thinks that commas should come in pairs like brackets so I usually end up with too many! As for full stops inside quotes, I seem to alternate between inside and outside. I think putting them inside is the correct way but sometimes it looks wrong! If I’m quoting someone then I put them inside:

    He said, “That’s what she said.”

    But if I’m just using quotes to emphasise a word I’ll put the full stop outside:

    Cook the meat until it loses its “pinkness”.

    I have problems with full stops and brackets. If I’m writing something (and have an aside in brackets) do I put a full stop inside (like this.) Or outside (like this). Or both (like this.). Of course, the reality is I’m probably misusing the brackets rather than the full stops.

  33. (W) change the emoticons set , some of the :developer: ➡ >-I |_| when eat her :burrito: ❓ my :bear: <3 but i 😳 O_o o_O hate the 💡

  34. Ah, Joe, but you’ve left out the best accidental trend these days, mixing up two or more idioms. Like:

    Holding you over the fire. No, it’s “hold your feet to the fire” or “rake you over the coals”.

    Whatever floats your fancy. No, it’s “whatever tickles your fancy” or “whatever floats your boat”. (My personal version is “whatever blows your skirt up”.

    Add salt to the injury. No, it’s “rub salt in the wound” or “add insult to injury”.

    I hear it way too often in conversations and I have to giggle when I hear someone do it. I’ve only recently started interrupting them and correcting them.

    Hey, whatever I can do to slow down the process that gets us to the inevitable reality that is the movie “Idiocracy”, I’ve got to do my part.

    -Mike A.

  35. IOMG, LOL, and any other online short-hard incorporated into an actual conversation.

    I wanted to clarify that while having a verbal conversation with someone they said LOL instead of simply laughing?

    I don’t know how I would react to that.

    OMG, while annoying I get, but saying LOL… that is just weird.

  36. The one I’ve been hearing lately that is really annoying is “jelly”. As in: “I’m so jelly because my friend got a new car!”

    The word is jealous…um…actually I believe it’s envious. Isn’t jealous used for living creatures? As in: “I’m so jealous because my boyfriend is paying too much attention to his female friend.” or “I’m jealous because my dog is paying more attention to my roommate than me.”

    Jelly goes on bread…sometimes with peanut butter! 😉

  37. My pet peeve words/phrase: “Whatever!”

    And every time I see LOL, I immediately think of that episode of “Curb Your Enthusiasm”

    And when they husband says something is “okay.” I can never understand because the inflection is always neutral. So I always have to ask, “okay good? okay average or okay bad.” Then I get, “It’s fine.” (Rolls eyes).

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