1It happen to monster all de time.  Me have fond memories of a movie or t.v. show, someting from way back in de day when monster have more fur on top and much less on de bottom (if you know what me mean) but, invariably, when me sit down for a rewatch, monster always end up more disappointed den a client of Grover’s Male Escort & Drywalling Services Inc. (He not always get all de corners.  And me not talking about drywalling).  Scary movies be less scary, funny movies less funny, and sad movies downright cheesy.  Monster call dis de Law of Diminishing Returns on Returns.  And de further back you go, de more disappointing it get.

Which be why monster kind of confused wit Despicable Me.  It only tree years old and yet it come highly recommended from people who say it a GREAT movie!  HILARIOUS!  Well, dis movie be good, but nowhere near great, and more fitfully amusing den hilarious.  It be a perfektly “fine” movie.

Oh, me know, me know.  Why be so critical, monster?  After all, dis be a movie for kids, brain-dead parents, and people who just woke up from vegetative state.  Sure, but just because dat de case not mean it have to be half-ass.  Remember The Incredibles?   Toy Story?  Cookie Monster’s European Vacation and Toy Tie-In Extravaganza?

Supervillains = super dads.  Studies have shown.

Gru, a bald supervillain wit an almost incomprehensible accent, feel irked when a rival supervillain pull off pyramid heist.  So, he decide to go one better by stealing…de moon!  All he require = 1. One shrink ray, and  2. Money.  For some reason, nabbing de shrink ray be easy, but stealing cash prove an insurmountable problem for him.

And it only get worse for Gru when rival supervillain, Vector (imagine a slightly geekier, slightly eviler Bill Gates) steal his stolen shrink ray.

Testing new operating/doomsday system: Windows Armageddon 2.0

Gru adopt tree cute orphan girls and use deir door to door cookie business to infiltrate Vector’s headquarters and steal back stolen shrink ray stolen from him.

Cute as buttons.  Wait.  What you mean you not find buttons cute?

Of course, orphans end up growing on Gru and, when dey get kidnapped by Vector, he give up his moon-napping plans to save dem!

Little scene stealers.

Me not want to give anyting away, but it all end pretty much exaktly as you would expekt.  Still, dere be plenty of cute moments, mostly tanks to Gru’s adorable yellow minions and littlest kid who reminiscent of a young Elmo before he get all full of hisself and start speeding around Calabasas in his porsche.  Dese elements make monster want to check out de sekwel, Despicable Me 2.  Dese elements AND friends who highly recommend it.  According to dem, it be GREAT!  HILARIOUS!  Monster can’t wait!

Verdikt: Better den a punch to de head.  And Shark Boy and Lava Girl. But not Megamind.

Rating: 6.5 chocolate chippee cookies.

18 thoughts on “July 22, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Despicable Me!

  1. Wait a minute. How can this be better than Shark Boy and Lava Girl when you say things like, … dis be a movie for kids, brain-dead parents, and people who just woke up from vegetative state.

  2. Lem’me finish!! I would think it would be at least equal to Shark Boy and Lava Girl. Not that I’m saying it was equal because Shark Boy was better. Cookie is mean! Cookie have no taste! 😡

  3. I agree. The movie was fine. It was watchable. It was funny. The plot was mostly followable, but the minions stole the show and frankly, who cares about Gru?

  4. Holy bleep, the most insane thunderstorm literally in my own back yard wow. Seeing all kinds of forked lightning ripping through the sky, and one so close it made me jump lol. Had a camera out wanting to capture but considering how close that was, no thankyou. The time interval between the lightning and the thunder is literally non existent(Literally you could count to 3 and its there).

    Anyway with regards to this movie, I liked it personally. The 2nd one was decent. I think Cookie Monster should do a special review, he should go watch Pacific Rim. And review it when its finished its run to avoid spoiling people.

  5. Despicable Me 2 was more of the same. It was alright but not quite hilarious or superb or anything of the sort. Although, I did see it at a drive-in theater which may have added some distraction and taken my attention away from the movie so maybe I just missed the hilarious moments.

  6. I came across Despicable Me a bit by accident.

    Sitting on a flight from Australia to England my girlfriend noticed some kids watching something on an iPad across the isle. They seemed to be really enjoying it. Later she asked me, “What’s that kid’s animated movie with the robot spider cookies?”

    Being the font of all movie knowledge, especially when it comes to kid’s animation, I didn’t have a clue. Especially when all she could tell me about it was “robot spider cookies.” But, unable to leave a mystery alone, as soon as I got home I did some Googling for “robot spider cookies” and eventually narrowed it down to Despicable Me. So I tracked down a copy and we watched it.

    I have to admit, I quite enjoyed it the first time round. It wasn’t laugh out loud funny but it was amusing. The design was very stylish and the animation first class.

    The minions definitely stole the show which makes me wary of the sequel as I’m sure the minions will be overdone.

    Upon second viewing I still enjoyed the movie but the soppy, sugar coated story started grating on me. An evil genius who just wants approval from his Mum. Orphan kids who just want a Dad. Barf!

    I never thought about Gru using his evil genius to just steal money. Well spotted, Cookie! Perhaps stealing money is beneath that sort of villain?

  7. Now, some people would say that this movie is too cutesy-poo, too “twee”. I, of course, would be one of those people.

    Sure, I normally would have all sorts of questions, like would the mass of the moon remain the same despite its reduction in size? Kind of like a black hole? If so, how could they pick it up and move it around so easily? Or, if these characters can possibly be harmed in any way, how does Gru survive the sharks and missile attack security at Vector’s place?

    Anyway, I guess a movie like this can’t be measured against normal standards, being “for kids” and all. And, it was entertaining enough for what it was. But then, I consider Pixar’s best like Toy Story, Monsters, Inc., and Up! and the difference in depth is dramatic. The story here is about as deep as a sheet of paper. I’m still firmly of the belief that kids deserve that kind of story telling.

    Also, call me evil (it wouldn’t be the first time someone did it!) but I rather liked the “before” Gru than the after one. Popping the kid’s balloon animal near the first? Thing of beauty, that.

    Gotta go to work!

  8. Er, on re-reading, I should clarify that I think kids deserve the deeper storytelling, not the shallow kind like this. Stupid 6:30 am!

  9. I enjoyed it but I don’t look for deep meanings in movies. Have a good day all!

  10. Aw, this makes me sad. I liked this movie far better than The Incredibles or Toy Story. But maybe I’m just a sucker for the dad-adopted kids thing. Also, unicorns! And those damn adorable minions.

    As for the sequel, I didn’t find it AS funny, but it was still adorable. The best part was my roommate and I realizing with horror that the jokes in it so funny to us were put in because we’re now the age where we’re supposed to only see this kind of thing if we’re taking out kids to it.

  11. I think I heard somewhere that the minions are getting their own movie. (sorry if someone else mentioned haven’t read comments for a couple of days)

    From yesterday… it reminded me that Jenny Lawson posted this site as one her favs, might be of some use to you…



  12. Oh honestly, Cookie. *hands on hips* 😀 Just as not all movies are Academy Award-winners, not all animated movies will beat the Pixar/Lasseter gold standard of story-telling.

    But there IS a story here, Gru/the protagonist is a really bad guy who is unwillingly good, the kidlets torture him by drawing out his sweet, goofy side, Dr. Nefarious is the bomb, the minions soften Gru’s evil side & provide side humor (vaudeville, anyone?), and we find the original soft spot in Gru’s heart: his mom. Of all the super villains I’ve met onscreen, Gru reminds me of you the most, Cookie, er, Joe. Except you exercise and have more hair. 😀

    I didn’t have a problem understanding Gru’s Russian accent at all. I’m surprised you did, being multi-lingual and having a practiced ear. Now I will say that Vector was the weakest link in this storyline. Being smart and wily are good qualities in a bad guy, but bad guys need to be more threatening and dangerous than the protagonist. Else where’s the suspense?

    Nit-picky as I am, I loved Despicable Me. It not only pleases kids, sleepy parents, and the recently comatose, it also is able to please a segment of “what-if” & “drôlerie” lovers, who are also sci-fi and fantasy fans.

  13. I wonder where the footage was of Vector dying his inevitable death by slow asphyxiation on the Moon? On the cutting room floor, I suppose.

  14. G’day

    This movie is on quite regularly at my house as the boy LOVES it.
    Just good old fashion fun. Do not need to be a genius to follow the plot…mmmm maybe I am just a mind numbed parent. The movie is funny and good. I prefer it over Megamind. The girls are adorable. Gru is cool, I found his accent easy to listen to, funny guy.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.