Ooooh.  Look at what arrived in the mail yesterday…

Yes, that’s right!  It’s an advance copy of Joe Abercrombie’s latest: The Heroes.  For those of you not in the know (and, really, you should be if you’re up to date on my blogly matters), Joe not only happens to be one of my favorite authors (check out The Blade Itself, the first book in his awesome First Law trilogy and go from there) but a close personal friend of Baron Destructo.  I’m dying to get started on it but, unfortunately, have had to put off my reading until I complete a first draft of that infernal script.  I’m aiming for Monday but I fear that maybe overly optimistic given that I’ll be spending all of tomorrow in editing on episode 16, The Hunt, which is two minutes long with about another five minutes owing.

Anyway, The Heroes happens to be the latest in a long line of terrific surprise presents I’ve received over the past few days in the lead up to my big weekend birthday extravaganza…

Back in early high school, I honed my French reading on Goscinny and Underzo’s Asterix and Obelix comics.  About five years ago, I picked up the collection – en Francais of course – and re-reading them brought back all sorts of great memories (like the time the boys traveled to Egypt and met Cleopatra, or the time Panoramix went missing on a druidic convention).  This copy of Le Grand Fosse comes compliments of blog regular, Anais.  Merci, Anais!

Also received…

My very own noodle cup, compliments of blog regular Lise, which I promise to put to good use once I actually start making my own noodles.  Thanks, Lise!

And, of course, who can forget the miracle fruit tablets and special mugs –

Compliments of blog regular Quade.  Thanks, Quade.  They’ve proven very popular in the front office.

Then today, guest director Alex Chapple swung by my office bearing gifts –

A delectable assortment of Jacques Torres (Mr. Chocolate!) chocolates.  Not so much an early birthday present as it is a thank you gift for inviting him to my annual chocolate party (check the archives, ed.).  I thought that was really cool and classy of him.

Speaking of birthdays, a BIG birthday shout-out goes out today to writer/director/executive producer/good friend/fellow foodie Robert C. Cooper who is no doubt out there somewhere enjoying himself immensely NOT writing.  I’m soooooo jealous.  Happy Birthday, buddy!

Talked to Martin Gero today and, alas, he’ll be unable to join Ivon and I when we hit Tokyo in December.  Turns out the Golden Boy will be busy working on a couple of super secret projects of his own.  It’s exciting stuff and I can’t say too much, but I will leave you with two words: ostrich gelding.

Also putting a damper on things was the performance of my Snow Monkeys in last weekend’s Stargate NFL Fantasy game play.  We got our asses kicked thanks to a poor performance by Texans Quarterback Matt Schaub.  We’ve fallen to 1-4, but I have high hopes for this weekend’s match-up vs. Petunia’s Crew.  Heading into Sunday’s games, I’ve got Bush (Raiders) and Gore (49ers) at the Running Back positions, Marshall (Dolphins) and Harvin (Vikings) at wideout, and I’ve picked up Moeaki (Chiefs) off waivers to bolster the TE position.  I’m losing faith in QB Schaub (Garrard [Jaguars] is my back-up and I’m also about to claim Atlanta’s Matt Ryan off waivers)  and the love for my team defense (The Baltimore Ravens) continues to ebb.

Snow Monkeys Rule!


35 thoughts on “October 14, 2010: Joe Abercrombie’s The Heroes! Early birthday gifts and wishes! Marty G. a Tokyo no-show! Snow Monkeys Rule!

  1. I have always wondered whether Snow Monkeys would have bright red faces if they didn’t sit in a steaming hot bath all day.

    “ostrich gelding” – a pretty strange duo of words. 😉

    It won’t be long before the Gruesome Twosome are off to Japan – is Tokyo prepared for the Ivon-Joe invasion?

    Live Long and prosper

  2. Oddly enough, monkeys are my least favorite animals on the planet. Well, except those cute little marmosets and tamarins. But the larger monkeys – from chimps to gorillas – just remind me of dirty old men for some reason…they kinda skeeve me out (and not in the good rock-n-roll way, either).

    So, needless to say, your Snow Monkeys are on their own.

    However, I would like to share this with you:

    I’ma thinkin’ that Telford could use that li’l fella just about now… 😉


  3. Good Morning, its stupid o’clock and most otherwise sane people are still slumbering. Its going to be a long day:)

  4. Hi Joe!

    I’ll leave a birthday wish today in case I don’t get online on the weekend…

    Hope you get spoilt like crazy!

    I’m still making your gift..I’m sure this doesn’t surprise you. Hopefully you’ll get it soon…meanwhile I hope you got to enjoy some of the Aussie treats I sent via Ivon with the Super Secret Project. I hear the TimTams were a hit in the office.

    Cheers, Chev

  5. I suppose I should say I’m off to Armageddon on the weekend…seeing Michael, Ben and Torri and catching up with friends.

    Its gonna be Super Secret Awesome!!

    Cheers, Chev

  6. I can’t believe I’m doing better than you in Fantasy Football. I’m a 49er fan….brutal….

    I lost this week to someone who hadn’t won a game…yikes!!

    Best wishes Joe.

    Cheers, Chev

  7. @dasNdanger The Japanese clip shows how to totally traumatise your children in one easy lesson.


    I don’t have children 🙂

    I have two cats instead 🙂 🙂

  8. Happy Birthday Mr. Cooper!

    Jeff was enjoying the Texan/Giants game, being the big Giants fan that he is, and ecstatic that they won.

    Well, today is the extension deadline for tax returns in the US, and despite very poor looking odds last weekend of me getting finished, I did get finished. Slept on it overnight and remembered a deduction or two. Without having to have a World War with the school district starting in January and lasting to April, or in this past year’s case, June, maybe I’ll catch up on filing on time for once.

    For those of you who aren’t friends with me on Facebook, I just want to tell you how fabulous Patrick is doing at the private school. It is amazing what you can do when you are in an environment with people who believe you are intelligent and capable of learning. Today he had such a funny day. He had the entire class cracking up (and I was proud to know that others found him funny). Apparently he was laughing so hard he actually fell off the occupational therapy swing but landed safely into bean bag chairs where he proceeded to laugh even harder. Every day I’m treated to some new astounding or amazing story of something he did or said (yes, as in speak from his mouth, not just sign language; my nonverbal child has become quite verbal in just 3 months–take THAT incompetent school district.

    As for me, after shattering the large 7 mm x 9 mm left kidney stone, now I have “multiple” stones. I’ve passed 12 in 1 week; wondering how many more are still to come. Geez! Couldn’t he have washed them out while he was up there? Oh no, that would have been too easy.

  9. Wooow, le seul livre Asterix et Obélix qui me manque !!! J’arrive pas à le trouver sur le commerce celui-ci. En tout cas, bonne lecture Joseph, Vous allez voir, Asterix est Obélix est très amusant à lire, surtout que comme c’est en français, vous avez ici la version ORIGINALE ^^.

  10. C’mon Snowy Monks! 🙂

    Have already given up on Baltimore! 🙁
    But Tampa Bay were available so I grabbed them. Also grabbed Moeaki in another comp – should do very well against Houston (so far this year they are the team that TEs score most against)
    Percy Harvin won 5 games for me last week! 4 comps – one with a double header. Woohoo.

    On the SGU front… watched this weeks episode (thankfully Australia gets it a few hours before Canada!) Another great episode! Can’t wait to see what happens with Telford. I’m leaning towards him being able to communicate with his “friends” by the next time we see him.

  11. Je ne savais pas que tu lisais le français joseph.

    Astérix et Obélix est une BD géniale et je suis content que tu l’apprécies.

    Est-ce que tu connais Rahan ?
    Je viens tout juste d’en faire la collection avec tous les tomes sortis à ce jour.

  12. Joe

    I am glad it was a good Birthday Party. I am glad your SGU is getting more viewers. I would get interested in SGU and interested in SyFy again if you would crossover Joe Flanigan as Shepperd and the actor who played Todd to finish the pairing of Shepperd/Todd.

  13. Maybe if you named your team the Rabid Snow Monkeys your fantasy team might do better. Or if not, still make your fellow players worry about your reactions to losing…
    nice swag collection. I hope it’s all enjoyable, and that much more arrives soon.
    Now, off to acclimate the dog to the new kitten my sister had decided should be a part of the household. Cat hisses and swipes at the dog, who shows every intention of picking said kitty up and applying a crunch test to it. At maybe 5 weeks old(found by a friend drenched in the pouring rain, no sign of mom or littermates) the kitten would make a nice snack. Which in principle I approve of, being a dog person. The things we do for peace in the household…
    Thanks for the daily post and good luck on knocking out that script. Even though once it’s finished we’ll suffer months of teases about what it’s all about.

  14. Happy Birthday to Mr. Rob Cooper!! Hope it is wonderful!

    Go Snow MOnkeys!!!

    @das, have you seen the Wraith(doll)(like a Ken doll)(hah) that MGM store site has for sale, a little wraith to look at every day,dress,undress, you know.. not sure if it is Todd or not…

    Joe, are you dining out for your birthday, anywhere special? Do that for several days, birthdays should last longer than one day I think..the celebration I mean.

    I agree Joe Abercrombie is an awesome read. thanks

    Luck with the writing..

  15. J’adore Asterix et Obelix!

    And there we strain the extent of my ability to write in French. Long ago, and far away, I studied French in middle school, with an actual trip to Europe (and Japan) for a year between 7th and 8th grades. I sucked up Asterix and Obelix whenever I could wheedle my parents into buying me a comic. Between their exploits, and menus, I can still muddle through written French.

    Happy Birthday! Today is Hubby’s 51st, time to bake a cake! And by “bake a cake” I mean… well, not ostrich gelding.

  16. Hello Mr. Mallozzi,

    I’ve been reading a number of comments from fans on your blog and on Gateworld, criticising SGU. I also watch SGU for my regular Stargate fix. Hence, I shall begin my comment with a message to all those naysayers and negative critics:

    SHUT UP!

    Now, I would firstly like to say that, as a writer myself, this show is superbly written. The characters Rush and Young are like Lelouch and Suzaku, or Light and L. Therefore, I am hoping that you will keep this dynamic. I remember the end of a season one episode (can’t remember which one) where Rush was carving pieces for a chess set. I’m curious as to when we’ll see a scene with them settling their scores with intimidating looks and strategic moves :-). Moreover, I dislike the sentiment that the dynamics of SGU are different from those of SG1 and SGA, when there have been many episodes in both series that have similar tones to this show. And I have found those particular episodes to be among the most enjoyable of the franchise.

    I do have something to say though. It’s not so much a complaint or criticism as much as it is a request. I was rather disappointed by the lack of attention actually given to alien characters in this series. We never got a chance to get to know the Blueberries as much as we did the Wraith or the Goa’uld. These green-red aliens in last week’s episode looked awesome, and I thought the scene with the fruit was like the scene with Daniel Jackson meeting the Abydonians in the original movie. I was a little hopeful that the characters would meet peaceful aliens who would be willing to work with them to understand Destiny. But I was dismayed to see yet more hostility.

    My request is, as a fan of stargate, to put a bit more alien interaction into the show. Not just ships; it’d be cool to see some guest characters from alien races. I’m sure there are ways it could be done without detracting from the original intent of the show to focus on character development in a strange unexplored universe. Here’s an example. Depending on how far the Seed Ships are ahead of Destiny, perhaps the crew could encounter a race that figured out how to build their own DHD, like in SG1, and they use the gates for exploration. Then, Lo! and Behold!, this ship comes out of nowhere and starts dialing their gate system. It wouldn’t have to be a multiseason arc, but certainly something that would make for a few exciting episodes.

    Of course, you may reserve the right to reply to this comment with a miles-long email rant, berating me for such an idea (hell, I do it whenever someone else tells me what I should put in my stories – who are they to inject their sub-par creativity into my work, rotten buggers :-P).

    On another note, I am really looking forward to the episode when Rodney McKay gets onto the Destiny (likely with some kind of Arcturus-based idea to power the gate, I bet). I am really hoping that he and Rush have a history of rivalry, along the lines of that SGA episode with the moron who builds that heatsink connected to a dimensional bridge. That would be so awesome to see: Canada vs. Scotland at the edge of the universe! They could sell tickets. I am aware that the episode with the SGA cameos has already been written (not sure about filming), so I’m not saying you should put it in. But it’s just so damn exciting to think about Rodney McKay on Destiny.

    Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read this comment (if you have read it, that is). I hope my suggestion didn’t come across as negative criticism or pestering for a return of SGA. I’m waiting on the movie for that :-D.

    Regards, C. S. Cooper

  17. Hey Joe,

    Are you guys breathing a little easier now that the rating appear to have rebounded? Are the other writers bowing down before you, especially one named Carl, since the rebound occurred on your episode? I for one am glad to see the ratings go back up. Have you gotten any word yet on the DVR ratings as well?


  18. @ susan the tartan turtle – Yeah, not sure you could get away with something like that in the US, although someone pointed out to me it’s not much different than taking your kid to a haunted house for a good scare.

    @ Airelle – You mean the action figure? If so, then yeah…I have three. 😛 Alas, their clothes do not come off…NOT that I’ve tried to undress them, or anything… *whistles innocently*


  19. Hey Joe,

    I thought I would resubmit my thoughts and questions from Awakening just in case you don’t go back three days for mailbag questions.

    Well so many questions! First my thoughts (Spoilers)….excellent work Mr. Mallozzi you had me on the edge of my seat wanting more..the news aliens are cool and definitely friendly i think…why stun and not kill. Telford being left behind…didn’t see that coming.I have a feeling we’ll see that ship again. T.J. is a badass!

    1.) “Homeworld Security is expecting us” does that mean Stargate Command is in D.C.?
    2.) Is there a working gate on the seeder ship?
    3.) How much longer do we have to wait until Rush’s Secret is found out?
    4.) IS there a reason for the bridge of the Destiny rising from the hull other than being cool?
    5.) Should we wait until Fridays to submit questions on the latest SGU episodes since you are waiting for it to air in Canada?

  20. Joe I am glad SGU is getting more viewers from this side of the border, however If you were to finish the Shepperd/Todd storyline by doing SGA cameo appearance with John Shepperd(Joe Flanigan and the actor who plays Todd) Todd that would draw my attention to SGU. As it stands now, I record NCIS and NCIs LA on DVR while working. I could stop recording NCIS and do SGU because I am losing interest in NCIS except for Ziva, she makes the show.

  21. Good Morning Joe,

    Quick question for you. *SPOILERS*

    When Rush is brought to the gate construction room aboard the seed ship whose idea were the SG1 musical cues? I thought that was particularly awesome and made me smile.



  22. Would it be possible to use the communication stones for something other than what they’ve been use for? I was thinking it would be cool to get a data link going across them back to Earth, SGC could have a live kino stream, the crew could email their friends and family or catch up on your blog…

  23. Hey Joe, check this from twitter:

    BadAstronomer Phil Plait
    @scalzi Also, almost caught up with SGU. It’s *amazing*. Well written, characters with depth. Not a big SG fan, but SGU is a superior show.

    I can picture the whole of NASA watching SGU.

  24. @ Mister Malozzi^^ please can you give us a complete Tracklist with all Tracks from all SGU Episodes so far??

  25. Asterix & Obelix! I have no idea why those books (along with Tintin) were so popular when I was growing up in Australia – every public library had them all. Loved them! 🙁 Then I moved here, where nobody had ever heard of them. 🙁

    Are the jokes really completely different in French?

  26. Nice picture of the snow monkeys. I saw a documentary on Snow Monkeys; there are caste in the snow monkey population. The lower caste is not allowed in the hot steamy water. I feel bad for those lower caste Monkeys that are watching everyone else soak in the “tub”.

    The SGU numbers are up? It’s a great show but I think you are right about the audience. Sci-fi viewers are more tech savvy (or like me, and they marry someone more tech savvy). Neilson hasn’t caught up to us yet.

    We are putting new windows in our house. Cat herding is getting old.

    Happy Birthday Robert C. Cooper!

  27. Dear Mr. Mallozzi,

    I have some questions concerning food on Stargate franchise for you:

    – What is the powder stuff the crew is eating on Destiny in reality? I know it is supposed to be a protein rich military powder, but is it really? Or are you using something else like vanilla pudding?

    – Do you happen to know how was the mud-like stuff, which prisoners have been eating on SG1 episode Prisoners (S02E03), made?

    You will really please my heart (and stomach) by answering these questions, then I will be able to make myself a proper Stargate feast. 😉

  28. Oooo…Sanctuary returns tonight on SyFy. I wonder if I’ll get a Chris fix tonight…



  29. Happy Birthday Joe

    I am glad your SGU is getting more viewers on this side of the border. I look at yutube but not SGu. I look at the SGA Extinction Trailers. When and if you crossover Shep/Todd and finish their pairing on SGU that would peak my interest in SGU and would draw me away at least from NCIS but not NCIS LA or Burn Notice on USA.

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