Happy Valentines Day! I celebrated by thinking warm thoughts of each and every one of you. And pan-frying some chicken livers with caramelized onions and a plum port reduction.
While many were celebrating the start of the Olympics, many others were protesting…well, I’m not exactly sure what the hell they were protesting. I’m sure there was a point to that big gathering in downtown Vancouver the other day but, unfortunately, whatever message those in attendance were attempting to convey was trumped by the violence that broke out, with demonstrators breaking shop windows, vandalizing cars, and assaulting police officers. According to event idiot, I mean organizer, Alissa Westergard-Thorpe, there was some property damage but “the people who committed the damage were not the ones arrested” (http://ottawa.ctv.ca/servlet/an/local/CTVNews/20100213/bc_violenet_protest_100213/20100213/?hub=OttawaHome). Yes, I’m sure that fellow reportedly nabbed wielding a bicycle chain was in the midst of fixing his ride when that crowd spontaneously formed around him. Hope he found his bike! Other poor, misunderstood protesters were no doubt victims of “intellectual profiling”, a practice that targets perfectly innocent imbeciles stupid enough to mask their faces in a crowd peopled by perfectly guilty imbeciles who also happen to be masking their faces. I know, I know. I’m sure they were only wearing masks because their skin is very sensitive and can’t take direct sunlight – and now they have to pay the price. How unfair! Protest idiot, uh, I mean organizer, Alissa Westergard-Thorpe refused to condemn the vandalism. “People can choose the tactics that they like,” she said. According to her, what went down was non-violent because no one was hurt. So, to be clear, in her books destroying public and private property is perfectly acceptable in the name of free speech. Which is good to know. Thus, in the future,sould Ms. Westergard-Thorpe ever find herself the victim of a property crime, she can simply chalk it up to someone’s freedom of expression.
Well, guess all the faux-anarchists and wanna-be rebels can pack up their marbles and return to their self-loathing middle-class existences. Until the next protest they can hijack!
Speaking of the Winter Games – echoing the Olympic spirit of friendship, dignity, and mutual respect, Canada handed Slovakia a humiliating 18-0 ass-kicking in Women’s Hockey. Boy, that makes me proud to be Canadian!
Hey, apparently Canada won its first gold medal on Canadian soil. I believe it was in log-rolling or something.
Reality television is an insidious creation that appeals to the basest of human fascinations, robbing audiences of the opportunity to view far more artistic, intellectually-challenging programming. As a writer and a producer, I am strongly opposed to it. In principle. Having said that – hey, who watched the series premieres of Survivor and The Amazing Race? First off, this latest installment of Survivor may prove to be my favorite yet with some of my favorite past villains (Russell, Boston Rob, Parvati, Randy, Coach and Tyson) pitted against some of my favorite past heroes (Cirie, Amanda, Rupert and James). I’m not at all sure why Coach is in the villain’s camp. While admittedly annoying, he certainly sees himself as a hero and does play the part with astounding earnestness. I don’t know. Maybe I like him because he reminds of my cousin. Also, not sure why Survivor’s number one villain and winner of the very first season of Survivor, Richard Hatch, wasn’t invited to participate. And, speaking of glaring omissions, where’s perennial fan fave Ozzy? Surely he should’ve scored an invite to the heroes’ table?
The Amazing Race, on the other hand, got off to its typically slow start. As always, it takes me a couple of episodes to really get back into the show. Still, the premiere offered up some entertaining instances, my fave being the guy, afraid of heights, who decides to prove his masculinity by tackling the vertigo-inducing high-wire challenge – and failing miserably on all counts. Also, I hope someone remembers to feed those cowboys otherwise I fear they may not be long for this world.




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