Or not. I don’t know. It seems plausible.
Anyway, I was late for work today but I had a good excuse. I was locked out of my garage. No, really. I packed up my things, harnessed the dogs, strolled across the backyard to my (detached) garage, tried to open the door and – it wouldn’t budge. At first, I assumed it was locked but closer scrutiny revealed that it was, in fact, unlocked and that the culprit was a faulty whatchamacallaslideythingiethatclicksintotheslot. You know. I called up my writing partner Paul and informed him I would be late. I explained the situation.
“It’s the garage door?”he asked.
“The door to the garage,”I clarified. “Not the garage door.”
“Do you have a key?”
“It’s not the lock,”I told him, my frustration mounting. “It’s the door handle. When I turn it, the bolt doesn’t fully retract out of the slot.”
“You mean the latch?”
What am I? The door expert? How can I be expected to be familiar with trade jargon?!
I was nearing the end of my very frayed rope and so I did what I always do when faced with a seemingly insurmountable obstacle: I cursed and delivered several well-placed kicks to the offending target. Then, I went inside, grabbed a butter knife, and proceeded to poke, prod, and jimmy the “latch” until I was finally able to get the damn door open!
As you can imagine, I was in quite a mood by the time I got in and my already sour disposition wasn’t helped by the news that everyone else had put their scripts out leaving me odd man out. So, while everyone else was in Brad’s office chatting away, I retreated to my office for one last pass at the script before handing it off to Lawren. The rest of the day was spent – what else? – reading scripts, although the true highlight was Ashleigh’s styling boots…
Well, hey now, this is interesting. I was in the midst of writing this blog entry when I heard the chirrup of the home alarm indicating someone had opened a window or door. My first reaction was: “Oh, Fondy’s home.” And then my second reaction was: “Fondy doesn’t live here anymore.” Plus: “And she’s in Jamaica!” My search of the premises turned up no open points of access and, more importantly, no one hiding in any of the closets, under any of the beds, or suspending themselves crucifix-form below any of the skylights. Just in case, however, take note – 8:15 was the approximate time that the suspect entered the premises.
I’m pleased to see the comments and questions on January’s book of the month club pick: Diving into the Wreck, by Kristine Kathryn Rusch. Keep ’em coming. Kristine is checking in! And I’ll be sending her your collected queries by week’s end.
Jenny Robin writes: “Rob could have stopped by to say ‘hi’ to me while he was in town Saturday at the Cowboys game.”
Answer: Actually, he did go by your place but you weren’t home. He rang the doorbell a couple of times and then walked around back. Alas, all the doors and windows were locked. Maybe next time.
Michelle writes: “Wait, if Paul is an exec producer this year, does that mean you are, too? I thought you were a bonded pair!”
Answer: Yes, we are both Executive Producers for SGU’s second season.
Jlgrand writes: “Still losing weight since your trip?”
Answer: No, but trying very hard not to gain with a sensible diet and two-a-day workouts.
Oneillfan writes: “Also, if you could take an unlimited supply of one food item only before being stranded on an island, what would it be?”
Answer: Chocolate – various kinds including the Vosges smoked applewood bacon milk chocolate truffles for that much-needed protein.
HBMC writes: “Where’s Brad?”
Answer: At the office with us – but he’s kind of camera-shy.
Joshwilko writes: “Any plans on visting “sunny” England in the near future? Also, what was the first tv show you wrote for, was it Stargate, or something earlier?”
Answer: Alas, no plans to visit England in the near future despite the invitations I received from two friends living in London. First t.v. show I ever wrote for? The Busy World of Richard Scarry. I wrote a story titled “Patrick Pig Learns to Talk”. In live action, it was an episode of a teen sitcom called Student Bodies. Paul and I ended up writing almost a third of the show’s 65 episode run. Our first one hour series: The Lost World.