Those of your who bothered to read yesterday’s blog entry know all about the heart-rending email I received from the poor unfortunate who reached out to me from his death-bed in Argentina to request my help in founding an orphanage in his name. I was touched. Touched by the prospect of granting a dying man’s request. Touched by the prospect of helping the children. And, of course, VERY touched by the prospect of receiving 25% of the $38.5 million dollars this sad, heirless soul would be leaving behind [Please see last issue. Editor.]. Well, I sent poor (in the figurative sense only) Ali a response, informing him that I would love to help out in any way I could. And, miracles of miracles, I received another email from him this morning:

“Dear Hazzencockle,

I have received your mail, i really appreciate your concern to my ill-health and your willingness to help to set up the orphanage foundation and for the needy, may the ALMIGHTY ALLAH bless you.

Meanwhile i need your truthfulness towards this work of humanity since im now in my sick bed and cannot undertake this foundation myself .I will need from you to forward me your personal informaton of passpot and bank ,your home address and your tellphone number. As soon as i recieves this i will forward your information to the bank to transfer the money to you as my next of kin.

I am waiting to hear from you as soon as possible .

Thanks,

Yours trully,
Engr. Ali”

Yes. Yes! By all means, let’s get started on helping those troubled tykes. I drafted the following response and sent it on its way:

“Dear Ali,

Good to see you are strong enough to write back! Given how sick you sounded, I was afraid that dearth would claim you before we had the chance to break ground on that orphanage. Speaking of which, I wanted to quickly run some possible orphanage names by you:

Hazzencockle’s Home for Wayward Youth

Aloysius P. Hazzencockle’s Gift to the Children

Aloysius et. Al’s Kid Crib

I’m working on a few more, but let me know if you have any ideas of your own or would be okay with one of the aforementioned suggestions.

Regarding the banking request – I invested $10 000 with the heir of a crown prince of Nigeria a few months ago and am concerned that I may have been scammed, so I have to be very cautious in my internet dealings. That said, your request comes at a good time as I was recently informed that I am the winner of $10 million in the U.K. Lottery, money I could use to help co-fund the orphanage!

I will be going to Europe to deliver the cash necessary to free up the funds (and pick up my winnings!) and since I’ll be in the area, would it be possible to meet up? I could deliver the documents then.

I don’t travel much so I’m not familiar with foreign lands (I assume they speak English in England? I’m not sure.) but I was wondering how close you are to the area? How long would it take you to drive from Argentina to Hounslow? If it’s out of your way, maybe I can hop on a train and meet you for the afternoon instead. I have heard many lovely things about Argentina and would love to get my picture taken with a koala bear. If this can be arranged, it would be dandy.

Sincerely,

Aloysius P. Hazzencockle”

Kids and koalas aside, I was able to make a return trip to Monde Chocolat yesterday for another little chocolate run. Now I’m not a fan of white chocolate (which, technically, isn’t chocolate at all), but Fondy is and she picked up some of the house white chocolate bark with almonds the last time she was in. She ended up finishing the entire square in one sitting – and with my help no less. Under intense questioning, owner Karlo Flores revealed that the white chocolate used is very special in that, unlike most white chocolates, it is conched (the final step in the chocolate-making process in which the chocolate is massaged and kneaded for days to achieve a smoother texture and creamier product, mellowing out any acidic tones.), which is why it possesses such an invitingly creamy, buttery finish. I picked up two more squares in addition to a coconut and cashew variation. I also picked up 7 new selections from the Zotter line. Check ’em out: lemon polenta, paradise apples + liquid olives, beetroot with galingale, saffron rice, apple balsamic vinegar, organic beer, and date-shiitake. Of the ones I’ve tasted, I’d have to say my favorite is none. Call me old-fashioned, but I think I’ll stick with the bacon bits bar.

Q&A –

WayBeyondSoccerMom writes: “Hey, care to comment on the movie currently in post production that Martin Gero is producing, writing, and directing called “Young People F**king”?”

Answer: The movie was written by Martin Gero and long-time friend Aaron Abrams (for pics of AA, check out my second annual chocolate party blog entry), starring Aaron, and directed by Marty G. Yes, it’s a departure from the scifi genre – more F**king than wraith-blasting – but you won‘t have to be a fan of Martin to enjoy the movie. A funny and telling commentary on contemporary relationships. And then they all get culled at the end.

PG15 writes: “Would you or the rest of the writers create a gay or bi character on Atlantis?”

Answer: How do you know we haven’t already?

Mackenziesmomma writes: “I am going to be up in vancouver near the end of the month visiting my canadian heritage, where would you suggest i get some good sushi up there?”

Answer: It’s hard to go wrong in Vancouver. However, my favorites are Tojos and Yujis.

ChevronSeven writes: “Hey, Joe, I tore a ligament in my foot. Do I get a dedication?”

Answer: Yes. I dedicate this blog entry to ChevronSeven. But you’ll have to share it with Anonymous #7 who got an ouchy sliding into second base yesterday afternoon.

Jessica writes: “Will the “Common Ground” Wraith ever get a name, say Steve Jr. or something?”

Answer: How about Todd?

Patricia writes: “What are your plans for Canada Day? Are you doing anything patriotic?”

Answer: I’m doing my part to help the Canadian economy by working on my script.

Vecturist writes: “I know comic con is still a few weeks away, but do you have a list of restaurants you plan to try, or would you like some recommendations?”

Answer: I’d love some recommendations.

Anonymous #1 writes: “Has there ever been any consideration for an episode dedicated entirely to the B-Team of either Atlantis or SG-1?”

Answer: We did it in SG-1. It was an episode titled The Other Guys. And then there was Proving Ground. We have no plans to do a similar story on Atlantis.

Anonymous #2 writes: “With all the suggestions for scifi books, I’m a little sad that nobody seems to read Ray Bradbury anymore.”

Answer: I re-read The Martian Chronicles just last year.

NZ Jackie writes: “Is there one episode of SG1 that you would re-do…?”

Answer: I can only pick one?

Linzi writes: “I just heard SciFi have announed September 28th for the premiere of season 4. Will SciFi be world premiering (is that a word?) Adrift?”

Answer: Yes. Sci Fi will be airing the First-Time Anywhere World Premiere of Atlantis’s fourth season. First episode up: Adrift.

Lanzo writes: “They laid me off of my job yesterday. I don’t know why, but I just felt the need to tell you that.”

Answer: Sorry to hear that, Lanzo. Hopefully a new opportunity will be coming your way soon.

Farscapefan writes: “Could you please tell me how big, or perhaps rather how small Claudia Black’s part is in Continuum movie, so I can decide whether to buy this DVD or not…”

Answer: Just big enough to make you want to buy the DVD.

Firefly827347 writes: “I was watching kids TV with my 4 year old nephew (my mother forced me, honest) and flicked over to see that Mona the Vampire was on (it was about a pixie, sorry I can’t be more specific…) and in the end credits the name Joseph Mallozzi popped up. 😀 How many eps did you do?”

Answer: Mona the Vampire was one of the shows I developed for television. I story-edited the first couple of seasons and wrote about a third of the episodes. Then the anti-vampire threads started appearing on the various Mona forums and it just got to be too much for me so I moved on to the calmer waters of Flying Rhino Junior High.

82 thoughts on “June 30, 2007

  1. Afternoon Joe, I just returned from a trip to my favorite explosives dealer to purchase my stash of Fourth of July fireworks. Looks like another promising tear fest will be headed my way along with the dingy silver cup from our contest.

    Question of the day- Audiobooks yea or Nay?

  2. First, Richard Scarry’s Busy World, now Mona the Vampire…have you been somehow involved with all my favourite cartoons?!

  3. Regarding your desire to assist the orphans of Argentina, I feel you might have been reading too much Ebola Monkey Man. (Work safe) But keep up the good work.

    And may I say that adding things like olive and beetroot flavors to chocolate is just a desecration of chocolate that will surely be punished in the Hereafter.

  4. I hope that the poor man on his death bed responds to your latest email. I’d never thought of actually replying to a scam email before…

    What are the appoximate running times for the Ark of Truth and Continuum?

  5. Hey if we’re throwing Sci-Fi authors around how about Isaac Asimov.
    You’ve got to love the three laws of robotics.

    1.A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.

    2.A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

    3.A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

    My sister still complains that she was the only seven year old in her school that knew then of by heart. Well I wasn’t going to read her Enid Blyton was I!

    Pauline

  6. Anonymous said…
    I think that’s part of the problem. It’s enough of an issue to get people from all over the country to go to Sydney for a con, let alone out to Parramatta

    As fully one fifth of Australia’s entire population lives in Sydney, I think the problem is more that so many of them wouldn’t even go to another suburb to see him. As far as I can see Atlantis has never been anywhere near as popular as SG1 in Australia. Hundreds of people went to Canberra, of all the godforsaken places, to MS.

    The above was poken by a true Sydneysider who thinks the rest of Australia doesn’t even exist.

    That Con was going to cost me over a $1,000 to attend if I had gone from Melbourne and no actor no matter how famous is worth that kind of money.

    On top of that it’s because SG1 and Atlantis didn’t rate well in Sydney that the rest of the country didn’t get to see it. We were told this at a Con by one of the people running the Con.

    Fact is Sydney’s ratings control the rest of our viewing, they don’t like it we don’t get it. Atlantis when it is shown is on Thursday night at 11-30pm with weeks and months in between eps not exactly going to gain fans that way. The same with SG1 all because Sydney fans didn’t want to watch it at the reasonable hour of 8-30pm where it rated No 1 in Brisbane.

    Jules from Melbourne

  7. Hey Joe
    When you answered Linzi question you wrote:

    Answer: Yes. Sci Fi will be airing the First-Time Anywhere World Premiere of Atlantis’s fourth season. First episode up: Adrift.

    My question is does that include Australia, but only the sci-fi channel, right?

  8. PG15 writes: “Would you or the rest of the writers create a gay or bi character on Atlantis?”

    Answer: How do you know we haven’t already?

    Perfect answer!

  9. Hey, Joe,

    I won’t be going to Comic Con so I’m going to ask you the question I would ask if I were going to Comic Con, which I’m not. Going. And it’s about Irresponsible, so please here me out. We all can agree that it was a mess but my question is — how does it get that way? I mean, Joe, you’re a head honcho, one of the bigger cheeses in the whole operation. How did it get away from you, buddy?

  10. Wow, so many variations of chocolate, however awkward they sound.
    I’ll be awaiting to hear Ali’s response to meeting up, however sick he is.

  11. Hey Joe, I am in need of a confirmation. Rob Cooper’s interview with Gateworld was just posted and he says that Julian Sands may not reprise his role (I don’t know when the interview took place, so…yeah).

    You have confirmed a few blogs ago that the Doci does appear…is Julian Sands portraying him, or is it, as Rob Cooper says, a “new pope” that’s guarding Celestis?

    Thanks Joe.

  12. And so I’m back. From outer space.

    Not really. Just from Canada. Visited the family, and everyone is still alive, which is a good thing (well, most days). It’s great to catch up on your blogs. I’m seriously so excited for the 4th season, because it sounds soooo good. I really think that the extra time will really make this season extra-special.

    Back to Canada. It wasn’t particularly exciting, I have to admit. We went shopping, we went to the movies and so on. The whole reason that I’m sharing this incredibably interesting information is that my family took me to see Ratatouille. I thought it was pretty good, all things considered. Have you seen it? Do you want to see it? Do you like animated movies? If so, what’s your favorite? And lastly, if you had to pick your favorite Atlantis episode thus far, which would it be?

  13. Joe,

    What are the chances our good friend, Aloysius Hazzencockle, could make an appearance in Atlantis Season 5? With his magnanimous, generous nature, he sounds like the kind of guy who’d be great friends with Lucius.

  14. Jules from Melbourne..

    The only reason atlantis hasn’t been as popular as SG-1 in Australia is because it has never had that 8:30 slot! SG-1 had it for a few seasons, built up a fan-base with the younger audience, who grew up with it and thus kept with it when it went later!
    I love atlantis more than SG1 now and i wish it could be given it’s 8:30 slot…

    Joe in regards to your blog to that poor unfortunate soul in Argentina…hilarious!!! Although, i must correct you on one thing, Koala bears??? i think not!! they are just Koalas…have you seen the size of them they don’t resemble a bear at all…and they are herbivores not omnivores (carnivores?)..tisk tisk a common misconception, so i shall forgive it!

    Can’t wait for the reply from your unwell, rich Argentinian Muslim who needs your full details and money!

  15. Hey Mr. Mallozzi,

    You mentioned in a previous post that Ben Browder did an ad lib in one of his first SG-1 episodes that played well and was left in.

    I was wondering:
    1) What’s the best ad lib an actor has done on an episode you’ve written that you’ve left in?
    2) What’s the best ad lib an actor has done on an episode you’ve left out?
    3) Is there any middle ground there that I’ve missed, perhaps an ad lib that was modified slightly and then left in?

    Also, if I don’t get a chance, Happy Canada Day from, well, me.

    Sincerely,
    Copernicus

  16. Joe,

    I don’t know if you guys had much to do with this series, but is there any way to acquire more than the first few episodes of Stargate Infinity on DVD?

  17. Hey Joe.

    Im here in Aus, and i just saw Transformers!!! Are you thinking about going?? Cause i plead for you to go, it was amazing!!!

  18. Jules, I feel your pain. SGA hasn’t even been on for the past couple of weeks, replaced by some stunt show. But I’m sure you’ve noticed.

    Thanks for letting me know that the ratings are all down to the “oh so cool” peeps in the big city north of the Murray. Typical.

    As Australia’s second largest city, you’d think Melbourne would count. But no, as with everything else in this country, nothing exists south of Wollongong, north of Newcastle or west of Bathurst.

  19. I cannot wait to see the reply from your poor Argentinian “friend”… I bet he will keep going for as long as you keep responding. Too funny!

    But anyways, to me question…What is the public transportation like up in Vancouver and Victoria? My friend and I are roadtripping up at the end of August, but we are unsure if we should find somewhere safe to ditch the car when going over to Victoria or just fork out the cash for the oh-so-expensive ferry across.

    Cheers, Dani

    P.S. I have to agree with what someone else said that chocolate is perhaps best when left in it’s pure, unadulterated form…some of those flavors sound way too bizarre!

  20. “Answer: Just big enough to make you want to buy the DVD”

    Oh so she appears for at least 10 seconds????

  21. Joe- you helped to create Mona? I can’t believe that…I had no idea… I LOVE Mona the Vampire Slayer! ^_^ It’s a favourite kid’s show of mine… ^_^

    I’ve got an Atlantis question for you though. In ‘The Hive’ when Rodney tells Carson that he has no idea the agony that he was in and Carson replies ‘Oh- I have an inkling’ was this a hint that Carson was addicted to drugs at sometime in his past? And will we learn a bit more of this ‘inkling’ in ‘The Kindred’ ?

    Other than that- loving your blog as always as a source of Stargatey Goodness!

  22. Joe-

    Hahahaha! I love your response to Argentina Ali. While I’ve never responded to a scammer, I do reply to the *cough* adult *cough* spam I get – I tell them I am a minor and my dad is a federal agent. So only the later half is true, but I did get quite a few apologies and some pleads not to turn them in!

  23. Hi Joe
    Not sure about the flavours in the chocolates you bought but I love their covers. My most adventurous tries were lavender chocolate( boring) and chilli chocolate (very good to my surprise), have you tried either? Also, from one chocoholic to another, do you eat it everyday? what is your daily average consumption of chocolate?
    Also, I’m glad you enjoyed your Portuguese bread roll, have you been to a Portuguese cafe/patisserie? we make great cakes!

  24. I’m rather glad to hear those chocolate bars are not tasty. There’s an infinite combination of tastes I never need to worry about trying!

    Just finished “Old Man’s War” and loved it! So inventive, with a great balance of character development, plot, and good ol’ sci fi.

    So if you were implanted with a BrainPal, what would you name it?

  25. Here we go again.. educating non-Aussies who like to call Koalas bears. They are marsupials. They are not in any way, shape or form related to bears.

    And for the record, I think I’m going to scream if I hear another non-Aussie say “Eeee-Mooo”. It’s an emu. “Eeem-you”. It ain’t that hard.

    And Elle McPherson. Mc-Fur-sun. NOT Mc-fear-sun. It has a ‘her’ in the middle of it. Not a ‘hear’.

    I think I’ve got that out of my system now.

    Though I’ll also say I love it every time David Hewlett says Zed-PM! Yay for Canadians speaking the same English as we do. Almost.

    Now if Americans could just stop saying ‘spit’ when they mean ‘spat’, I think my blood pressure may lower a bit. If I hear one more person on an American TV show saying “He spit on me” or “the baby spit up”, I’m going to spontaneously combust. Spit. Current. Spat, past tense. It’s not brain surgery, people.

  26. PG15 asks: Would you ever create a gay or bi character in Atlantis?

    Answer: How do you know we haven’t already?

    You know everyone’s going to be talking about this, right? I surprised no one’s asked you who it is (if indeed there is one) I’d ask you, but you’d probably give me a non-answer, so I’m even going to bother. 🙂

  27. PG15 asks: Would you ever create a gay or bi character in Atlantis?

    Answer: How do you know we haven’t already?

    Hahahaaaaaaaa. There are actually people who believe that Shep is gay, and he kirks to try to hide the fact. He’s also apparently in a gay relationship with Rodney, JM. But since you don’t read fanfiction, you’re forgiven for not knowing that.

    Seriously. You should see the stuff that’s written on LJ and GW.

    If you say that it’s ridiculous, you’re homophobic, by the way. Just so you know.

    Don’t know about you, but I think Shep’s as straight as they come.

  28. Hey Joe,
    Nice work on the scammers.

    One question: The Ark of Truth and Continuum, will they be global DVD releases, or just for the US? (please say global!…)

  29. When you film an episode , you sometimes say how you had to leave scenes out cause of time issues even though the scene was filmed. My question is what is done with that and why dont you guys ever insert some of that back into episodes on dvd release?

  30. Pre-apologies to everyone.

    I am taking a week of vacation beginning 38 minutes ago, and I am feeling like I must be creative or I’ll burst!

    So, I have decided to post a series of songs based on various people, places, and things in the world of SGA.

    They will all be songs set to the tunes of various Broadway show tunes and movie musical songs, so that you all may sing along if you wish.

    So if anyone out there has a particular person or song you want me to parody, give it a shout out, and I’ll see what I can do.

    To be posted later Sunday afternoon: “Some Atlantis Evening”.

  31. Will there ever be Christmas in Atlantis? I can’t believe it’s been left out (note I think SG-1 did. But talking about SGA here and the future) the last three years. Just about every shows in the US does it. Can we expect something in the coming season(s)?

  32. “In ‘The Hive’ when Rodney tells Carson that he has no idea the agony that he was in and Carson replies ‘Oh- I have an inkling’ was this a hint that Carson was addicted to drugs at sometime in his past? And will we learn a bit more of this ‘inkling’ in ‘The Kindred’?”

    He was referring to the agony McKay’s paranoid state of mind was causing him. I thought it was rather straightforward, and amusing for that matter.

  33. Oh, Joe! Your replies to the spam are absolutely hilarious. Can’t wait to hear the new response!

    Also, I watched a video of your press event from the other day, and I must say, you looked very sharp up there. I enjoy the fact that just about everyday you appear to be dressed to walk down the red carpet. Thanks to you and the other wonderful Atlantis cast/crew for doing that: it was informative and fun. Rachel and David’s accounts of some of their more crazy fan interactions were simultaneously amusing and horrifying.

  34. Have you checked out 419eater.com? Some of the spambaiting on there is hilarious…

    PG15 writes: “Would you or the rest of the writers create a gay or bi character on Atlantis?”

    Answer: How do you know we haven’t already?

    So… when is Lorne gonna come out? 😉

  35. Linzi writes: “I just heard SciFi have announed September 28th for the premiere of season 4. Will SciFi be world premiering (is that a word?) Adrift?”

    Answer: Yes. Sci Fi will be airing the First-Time Anywhere World Premiere of Atlantis’s fourth season. First episode up: Adrift.

    That’s excellent news, Joe! Any idea about the back half of the season? Here in the UK, Seasons 1 and 3 aired before the US and Canada aired them even earlier. I know, I know, it seems EVERYWHERE aired the back half of season 3 before the US. Well, except Australia.

    I’m presuming, since Sky One don’t have hiatus’, that the same will happen this season.

    Do you think that will have any impact on the later episode ratings? Or, as it’s happened since SGA’s inception that it won’t be a problem as much, because the renewal decision will already have been made?

    You’ve really been making me smile about Ali, your Argentinian friend. I think I like
    “Hazzencockle’s Home for Wayward Youth” best. It has a nice ring to it, I think!

  36. Hiya Joe,

    OH MY GOD! You make me laugh so hard. XD

    Thanks. I needed that… 🙂

    YOU ROCK!!!

  37. Anonymous No.5 said;

    “Now if Americans could just stop saying ‘spit’ when they mean ‘spat’, I think my blood pressure may lower a bit. If I hear one more person on an American TV show saying “He spit on me” or “the baby spit up”, I’m going to spontaneously combust. Spit. Current. Spat, past tense.”

    I am so with you on that, grammer leaves a lot to be desired these days and it seems that Americanisms are insinuating their way into our lives because kids want to be seen to be cool!

    What the heck is “my bad”? Why not my mistake?

    Or “I heart”? Are people afraid of saying what they mean? Is love passe?

  38. Jessica writes: “Will the “Common Ground” Wraith ever get a name, say Steve Jr. or something?”

    Answer: How about Todd?

    Hmmm. Personally, I’ve been referring to him as Kipling since the ep aired. Something about “…the Thousandth Man will stand by your side to the gallows-foot–and after…” just connected with me in regards to him.

    Speaking of Kipling, uh, the Common Ground Wraith, will we be seeing Christopher Heyerdahl popping up in S4 as any other characters other than the CG Wraith?

  39. Salut, Salut Joseph!!!
    Sa va bien?
    =}encors un superbe et trés beau article aujourd hui!!
    je souhaite tout le bonheur a tout ces enfants,vous êtes vraiment généreux, mais si j aurais de l argent j aurais fais pareil.
    =}Vive le chocolat blanc!! hummm c est trop bon!!

    Question:
    Oui je vous est deja posez cette question plusieur foix, mais comme je n est pas eu de réponse…

    Il y a une chance qu un jour il est un personnage francais dans Stargate Atlantis???

    svp.. sa serais super!!!^^
    Vive mon pays que j adore^^!

    Aller! J y vais! A demain! passer une bonne journée avec plein de bon chocolat^^!

  40. Hi there,

    I know we had two earth ships fighting side by side with the Daedalus and the Orion, and from what I’ve read in spoilers we have something like that to look forward to in S4, but is there any chance of seeing 3 or 4 Earth, or Earth-controlled, ships fighting side by side? Or maybe Atlantis and two or three Daedalus-type ships?

    Also, do you know why the Prometheus was destroyed? Because while she did get a fitting death, I think it would have been better if she’d lived.

    And finally, I know we got the Apollo at the end of season 3, but are we going to get another ship at some point in season 4?

    Thanks very much.

  41. Dear Joe,

    Your blogs get funnier every day. I am a little concerned about the whole Ali thing though. I think he might be trying to con you. He says he has all this money and yet from his latest request to you he doesn’t have a pot to pass in.

    Forgot to ask the question I actually meant to ask yesterday (what with my concern for poor Ali).

    Has anyone ever written a screen play for ‘Old Man’s War’? If not, would that be something you would like to do and what would be involved in that? (Is there a lot of legal stuff etc).

  42. Thanks for answering my question! I can’t say I’ve heard of Flying Rhino Junior High, but I’m intrigued by the name.
    I hope you and Fondy are well! But remember, all that chocolate may mean more trips to the dentist…

  43. Fritz Leiber.
    Harry Harrison
    Poul Anderson
    Fred Hoyle
    Arthur C Clarke
    Isaac Asimov
    Philip K Dick
    Yup, I’ve been sorting out some of the boxes of books in my loft, only another 12 to go 3 of which are full of Star Trek. Of course there is a problem in that now I’vebeen reacquainted with these books I now have to re-read them so the sorting out is going to take longer than first estimated, if I’m not out in a day or so send a search party.

  44. I can’t believe with all the silliness in Joe’s letter you are focusing on the koala ‘bear’. Especially when he’s going to take a train from England to Argentina to see one !
    Don’t take everything so literally. Most people in N.A. know koalas aren’t bears. Just as we know the sun doesn’t rise or set, and the Atlantic Ocean isn’t a pond. It’s just an expression ! We have real bears here, and are more than a little educated about them.
    As you must know , Koala bear is a ‘term’ left over from early European settlers & explorers. They were referred to as the Native bear. The scientific name includes arctus (meaning bear). We have carried on that tradition for the historical, scientific and cultural reasons that it sounds cute and sells stuffed animals.

    If it makes you feel better , we have flying squirrels that can’t fly.

    Anonymous said..

    ” If I hear one more person on an American TV show saying “He spit on me”….” What shows are you watching ?

    Silver

  45. Joe,

    When you mentioned Richard Scarry in an earlier blog , I ran to check my toddler’s tapes.There wasn’t a writing credit listed. I did a web search & was quite impressed with your history in children’s televison. How do I know what episodes you contributed to ? Would you mention a few things you are happy with ?

    thank you,

    Silver

  46. Wouldn’t it be better to ask Ali if you can open a hospital instead of an orphanage? With all the little aches and pains we have ^^(my dog is being sick)!?
    Carolina, ChevronSeven and Anonymous #7: Get well soon!

  47. Joe

    An orphanage!! YOU!! What’s that bright light I see coming from British Columbia.. from Vancouver.. from the home of Joe Mallozzi.. A HALO!!
    Have you received a call from Rome yet? Sainthood has to be just around the corner.. ST JOE of BS(Bridge Studios). But you know an orphanage might be a good idea.. Just think of all the free labour.. lots of extras for the shows.. As long as you don’t get too many Olivers.. Enjoy Canada Day.. Love your blog..

    Dori

  48. Just wanted to say Happy Canada Day! What does Vancouver do to celebrate?
    Here in Ottawa, it is one gigantic party. The entire downtown is closed, and we usually get close to a half million people up on Parliament Hill and surrounding areas. This year, we have a small baby (9 weeks old) to contend with, so we’ll be staying away from the large crowds; instead, we’ll visit one of the museums today (all free for the day!) for more “quiet” entertainment.

  49. Answer: “How do you know we haven’t already?”

    I knew it. It’s Jack isn’t it Joe? That explains why Jack can’t decide between Sam and Daniel. Jack is Bi. Rick plays it beautifully too. Lets take “Threads” for an example – In one scene Jack hugs Sam and shortly after Daniel is naked in Jack’ office. Jack’s reaction – straightens his shirt, plays with the flagpole – great Rick adlib. As a matter of fact, Rick has been adlibbing these special Jack/Daniel scenes since the beginning of the series…..

    *Spacemonkey hug – Rick adlib
    *Holding Daniel in Need – Rick adlib
    *Pushing Daniel’s glasses up – Rick again
    *Flag scene – Rick adlib
    *Hair ruffle and sleepyhead comment – Rick adlib
    *wedding scene in 200 (yes Rick told) lots of Rick adlibs that are still locked in a vault somewhere.

    If only Jack had realized that Sam would have accepted Daniel too, then everyone could have lived happily ever after. *sigh*

  50. Could you take pity on this gal living in poor, uninteresting Atlanta and send her some of that “tree bark?” I’m not a fan of white chocolate and think that looks delicious!

    Please keep us up-to-date on the progress of your orphanage project. I’m curious how long they’ll keep this up.

  51. Hi Joe, having watched the rough cut of the two SG-1 movies I was wondering if Mitchell has many dramatic or character-driven scenes? Or would you say that the character’s role is more action based.

    I also have a pitch for the final scene of the SGA season ender:

    Sheppard, Teyla and Ronon enter an off-world diner. They order space beer and (space?) onion rings. Koyla, Michael and a Wraith are sitting at the lunch counter, marking time. Outside, McKay is cursing and having a hell of a time parallel parking a Puddle Jumper. And just then the door to the diner opens and Sheppard looks up and— the scene dramatically cuts to black and the credits role.

    …I’ll send you my billing address.

  52. Of all the times to be away… I was in Montreal when you had the flocking give-away! My family and I went to see the jazz festival, which might have been very interesting… except that I don’t like jazz…
    So is poor Mr. Whats-his-name even going to get (monopoly) money? I thought that he did compose a very compelling letter… he had punctuation and everything, look! But points off for bad capitalization.

  53. assie icon: (did you mean Aussie, btw?) about this comment —

    “What the heck is “my bad”? Why not my mistake?

    Or “I heart”? Are people afraid of saying what they mean? Is love passe? “

    I’m with you 100 percent with that. I mean, what the hell? It’s ridiculous. As dumb as ‘slow up’. I don’t know about you, but it was always ‘slow down’ when I was a kid, until we got inundated with American tv shows. Then there’s ‘wait up’. Yeah, that used to just be plain old ‘wait’.

    Oh and ‘word’. I hate ‘word’. What the hell is that? People are saying it here trying to sound like they’re from the hood? I saw a kid in Preston McDonalds once with his pants around his ankles and boxer shorts on and a cap on backwards throwing around terms like that. Kid, you’re from Melbourne. If you’re not tossing around Aussie terms, you should be throwing in a few Greek swear words, at least show a bit of ‘culture’! Silly malakas (ooh! Naughty word alert!)

    What really gets me is that there are people all over the world claiming ownership of ‘No worries’. That really irks me. Back in 2000, I was in Ireland and came across a Canadian backpacker who thought it was so funny that I said “No worries” and said he’d only heard that term since he’d been travelling and running into Aussies. Next thing you know it’ll be in some US slang book and they’ll be claiming it was one of THEIR terms.

    Bah humbug to that!

    We need to reclaim our identity… and here’s where I throw in a few fair dinkums, bloody oaths and say they can all suffer in their jocks and find their own slang…

  54. Hi Joe,
    I was very surprised that Jack wasn’t even mentioned in “Unending” while he got 3 mentions in “First Strike”. What was the reason? Is there some bad blood between RDA and Coop seeing that RDa isn’t in “Ark of Truth” as well! Will Jack be acknowledged in any way in Season 4?

  55. Silver, Aussies find it offensive that despite the fact we tell people over and over, they still refer to Koalas as bears.

    Onto Slashing.. Nope. Don’t get it. I really, really don’t get it. Especially since a lot of slashers seem to be straight, and even married women. What’s that about? I don’t get it. Do you want your male fantasy object to want other men so that you won’t have to face the reality that he’s never going to be yours? How does any woman find slash ‘exciting’? Not trying to offend anyone here, I just really, really don’t understand.

    Oh, and nice rundown of RDA’s adlibs, etc. Teryl told some stories of some shippy stuff she and MS did in eps with Janet and Daniel. Pair of closet shippers, those two, and such cute characters together.

    Poor Janet… I still miss her. What a waste of a great character.

    Of course I’ll be saying the same thing about poor sweet Carson and wonderful Elizabeth in a couple of years, too. Nothing can replace your favourite characters.

  56. Hey Joe – which outfit provides Robert Cooper’s media training? Is it the same outfit that does yours? He’s not as good as you at it though. His GW interview is, shall we say, interesting, mostly I found it kind of incredible.

  57. I love Rick’s adlibs. Besides the ones that have been mentioned (which I LOVE), one of my favorite adlibs that Rick did was in “Fire And Water”. Everytime Joe mentions sushi on his blog I think of that scene between Jack and Daniel, the surprised look you can definitely see on Michaels face when Rick surprises him with that line, and Amanda trying really hard not to laugh. Loved it. Of course I also think Of Michael’s wedding and kilts when I watch that episode now but that’s another story.

    Oh, and one of my favorite adlibs in season 10 was Michael’s Scooby Doo adlib in “Bounty” Loved it too.

  58. Joe, would you mind getting a postcard from a fan from her next holiday trip?

    Have a nice Sunday..

  59. I see 64 comments already. How many do you actually have time to read? Twenty? Fifty? All?

  60. Onto Slashing.. Nope. Don’t get it. I really, really don’t get it. Especially since a lot of slashers seem to be straight, and even married women. What’s that about? I don’t get it.

    Oddly enough, slashers don’t care if you don’t get it, and besides that, is Joe’s blog really the place to “educate” you, assuming you want to be? If you do, there are books, PhD theses, and friendly places on the net where you could do that. Unless you’re just writing here to register your disapproval in an oh-so-falsely-innocent sort of way?

  61. But no, as with everything else in this country, nothing exists south of Wollongong, north of Newcastle or west of Bathurst.

    I’ve been there. It doesn’t.

  62. If you say that it’s ridiculous, you’re homophobic, by the way. Just so you know.

    If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck…

    Don’t know about you, but I think Shep’s as straight as they come.

    Big surprise there!

  63. Onto Slashing.. Nope. Don’t get it. I really, really don’t get it. Especially since a lot of slashers seem to be straight, and even married women. What’s that about? I don’t get it. Do you want your male fantasy object to want other men so that you won’t have to face the reality that he’s never going to be yours?

    Well personally I have a pretty good grasp of the difference between fiction and real life so whether or Daniel is with Jack or with Vala makes no difference to me finding him attractive. YMMV of course…

    How does any woman find slash ‘exciting’? Not trying to offend anyone here, I just really, really don’t understand.

    Nobody’s asking you to. Some women like the idea of two men together in the same way some men like the idea of two women together. There’s nothing to “get” it just is. Human sexuality is a wonderfully varied thing.

  64. Accents and the different versions of English are fun to listen to. I kind of have a thing for voices anyway, and I just love listening to people talk. We used to have a girl from South Yorkshire living with us (in Kansas), and we had many conversations about words and inflections when she was here. I’m probably the only person in the Midwest who says “bum bag” because Clare would flinch every time I said “fanny pack.” Then when she got married here and her parents, grandmother and sister descended on us, we had to pick up their vocabulary pretty quickly (which helped immensely when we watched The Full Monty!). We also had to teach her mother how to appropriately ask for a cigarette in public.

  65. *waves*

    Oh wise, kind and generous Mr M. I believe you may have been mistaken in your blog today, with regards to Ali… Knowing the war torn countries as I do, I should advise you that Argentina and Nigeria are two different countries. 😉 I know I may be way off base here, but isn’t Ali from Nigeria? Unless of course with the wonderful news of you assisting him in his endeavours, he has made a miraculous recovery and managed (on his death bed no less), to migrate thousands of miles across the globe.

    Unless of course you were referring to Ali’s twin who lives in Argentina, who had to respond on Ali’s behalf, as Ali become too excited with the assistance to build ‘Hazzencockle’s handy hideaway’, that conversing with you was too much.

    Please pass on my thoughts to Ali and give him my regards. If I can be of any assistance in liaising with Ali, please let me know. As I think what you and he are trying to achieve, is nothing beyond saint hood. Mother Theresa would be proud. It has to be said that I can’t help but be humbled in your presence Mr M.

    Thank you for making this world a lil nicer to live in. :o)

  66. Hi Joe,

    I have a question about 200 episode: there are pics of The Wizard of Oz sequence at Chicago Tribune clearly suggesting that the sequence was longer than what was aired and some dancing and singing was indeed involved. Are we going to see the whole thing at season 10 DVDs in the deleted scenes section? BTW, whomever brilliant idea was to make Vala Dorothy, give him a huge hug from me. Despite some anti season 10 creatures’ attempts to take it from Vala (GW’s anti season 10 thread), she IS Dorothy searching for home.

  67. Yikes. So much international strife and ill-will! And all over a name or two or a particular pronunciation! 🙁 It’s enough to make me think about becoming a hermit.. maybe joining Dr Who’s “Hermits United”.. 😀

    Speaking of… random question for ya Joe.. if you had the TARDIS and could go anywhere in history – backwards or forwards – when and where would you go? Personally, I’m leaning towards 28 September 2007, anywhere in the US with a TV and SciFi channel… 😀

  68. P.S.

    Crazymon said…
    We also had to teach her mother how to appropriately ask for a cigarette in public.

    OMG! *dies* I can just imagine! 😆

    You know what they say, the US and England are “two countries separated by a common tongue”.

    Pants is another word that can cause untintentional hilarity and confusion between US and UK folk… over here in the UK, pants aren’t something you usually wear out in public! 😆

  69. Anonymous ( from australia )

    I enjoyed your post.

    re ; Daniel-Janet. Whether you are a shipper or see them as good friends, those little moments are nice. I miss Janet too.

    There are some great Michael Shank’s convention clips regarding slash. One of them he tells of a woman showing him pictures/manipuations she had made of him.

    you wrote

    ” Silver, Aussies find it offensive that despite the fact we tell people over and over, they still refer to Koalas as bears.”

    If that’s the way they tell them, no wonder. As I wrote previously, there are valid reasons the term became popular. It is possible to know a phrase is not scientifically correct and still use it–shooting star for instance .
    A little clarity helps . If the posters want us to drop the bear part , they should have said so.
    Informing us the koala was not a bear , did not convey the message that the term is annoying. It sounded like they were trying to give us a zoology lesson. It did nothing to dissuade people from using the phrase. I didn’t know that Aussie’s were offended when we said ‘koala bear. until your post.

    Silver

  70. so since it was mentioned in that press thing you did that joe now plays guitar on set..can we expect to see shep playing the guitar sometime in the future? 😀 please?

  71. Happy Canada Day! Did you do anything in particular to celebrate? As I do nearly every year I went to the parade on Pierrefonds Blvd. Some of the floats were surprisingly well done this year considering they are all done by volunteers. Spent the afternoon in my parents pool, which was quite nice as the water temp was 24 while the air temp was only 19. Hope you enjoyed the day.

  72. Sam is Dorothy Joe and don’t let anyone tell you differently. As they say in “Seth” (canonical history of the show if you will) “Hail Dorothy” and it was Sam. Sam is and always will be Dorothy for the running gag of the Wizard of Oz that played out over 8 years with the original cast of Jack, Sam, Daniel and Teal’c.

    As much as Cooper wants to try and forget about the history of 8 years of Wizard of Oz references between the original, classic cast and the fact that Sam was Dorothy way back when pretty much seals the deal that Sam is Dorothy and Vala was just a sorry excuse to give her something to contribute.

  73. Sam is Dorothy Joe and don’t let anyone tell you differently. As they say in “Seth” (canonical history of the show if you will) “Hail Dorothy” and it was Sam. Sam is and always will be Dorothy for the running gag of the Wizard of Oz that played out over 8 years with the original cast of Jack, Sam, Daniel and Teal’c.

    Hmm. One off hand, situational reference by another character in one episode, 7 years ago *vs* playing Dorothy in full costume while your own character is following a similar arc of looking for a home. Nope, sorry. Not convinced. Vala is Dorothy, no contest.

  74. Alright, I don’t think anyone’s reading this blog anymore (last post on 2007, apparently), but here I go…

    I agree with whoever had posed the question over slash: why are so many straight, married women obsessed with slash? They get so defensive, too… As soon as the guy posed the question in one of the comments above, I /knew/ someone was going to pop up, ready to scorch and oh-so-sweetly antagonize. Surprise, surprise, someone did!

    The thing is, slashers look for slash EVERYWHERE. Normal friendship between guys is incongruous with their reality. No, instead, two guys meet (no matter who they are), exchange words and suddenly the sexual tension abounds. And who cares if the guys are family, or if they share a familial relationship, or hey, if the producers of the fiction intended for things to stay GEN – no, the guys are horny and therefore, romantically involved.

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