According to CNN, several hospitals are attempting to enact a “no photos/video during the birthing process” policy.  The hospitals claim it’s a liability issue while budding after-birth videographers insist it’s an attempt to avoid proof  of liability in cases of negligence. The majority of those who responded to the network poll on the subject felt they had every right to photograph and/or videotape the blessed event.  In other words, in a result that surprised no one, most people don’t like to be told “No”.  For my part, I’m with the hospitals on this one.  If this regulation can spare just one friend, family member, or unwitting dinner party guest the horror of sitting through Nick and Trudy’s three minute clip of The Miracle of Life, it’ll have been worth it.  “Okay, okay.  There’s the head.  It’s cresting!  And…there’s the baby!  Oh, and there’s the after-birth…and the poop. Alrighty, who wants some dessert with their coffee?”

A lot of people don’t ask me “Joe, what sites do you like to check out online when you’re trying to avoid writing a script?”.  Well, besides the usual suspects (http://www.theonion.com/http://www.cracked.com/ and, of course, http://www.maxim.com/amg/GIRLS/Girls+of+Maxim), these are a few of the lesser-known but often funny, usually hilarious, always entertaining sites I like to visit.  Take note, not only are they NSFW (Not Safe For Work), they’re NSFHIYHTLWSWTCWACFAFHPCOTV (Not Safe For Home If You Happen To Live With Someone Who Changes The Channel Whenever A Commercial For A Feminine Hygiene Product Comes On TV).

http://www.filthyrichmond.com/: Blogger Jocelyn Testes-Harder (heh) offers up an, er, earthy taste of life in Richmond, Virginia.  Her posts are a treasure trove of brilliant insights offering refreshingly unique takes on everything from motherhood to today’s hottest topics, like a recent entry on the controversial new airport screening procedures in which she comes down squarely on the side of the TSA (“Honestly, get over yourselves! The feel of those big curious hands are a small price to pay for our national security!”). The comments she receives are almost as funny as the site itself.

http://www.keepinitleal.blogspot.com/: “Where profundity has unprotected sex with profanity.” Oooh, bad girl.  And an opinionated bad girl at that.  Her last entry titled “I’ve decided I hate married people” should give you some indication.  As should her recent “Shit I learned this Christmas” that included such revelations as ” Similar to egg nogg, breast milk is full of sugar” and “Some dogs speak Spanish”.  Re: the latter.  Duh!

http://thehotlibrarian.blogspot.com/: A recent discovery, this is another blog that pulls no punches.  Don’t believe me?  From an October 27th, 2010 entry: “I ate all the orange and yellow Starbursts. AND WHY DID I DO THAT. I still have Smarties but I think the sugar is eating away the roof of my mouth and I should probably stop with those. I guess this isn’t a people problem as much as it is a candy problem. Unless we count “me” as the problem and we won’t be doing that unless we (you) want swift punches to the jaw.”

Finally, today’s entry is dedicated to blog regular Shirt ‘n ‘Tie.  Many thanks.  Mom was thrilled to receive best holiday wishes from Maeve Binchy.  Now if you can only get Barbara Delinsky to swing by for coffee and biscotti, she’s prepared to adopt you.

33 thoughts on “December 29, 2010: What sites do I check out? Well, I’m glad you didn’t ask…

  1. Haha – I’m in Richmond and that blog is great. If you’re ever in town shoot me an email and I’ll take you out to the greatest karaoke bar this side of the pacific.

    Cheers!

  2. Cracked.com is one of GeekBoy’s favorites, along with tvtropes.org. We had to make a rule that he can’t read “the good parts” out loud to us while we’re actually trying to watch TV. He thinks they’re ALL good parts, for one thing.

  3. I work in an Intensive Care Unit. We have family members come in all the time wanting to vid “Uncle Bob” right as he gets out from open heart surgery – because sure, he wants to re-live the sight of his privates hanging out, tubes in every orifice, and blood and assorted bodily fluids flowing from each one, etc. Guess it could be seen as a liability issue, but if we have consent from the patient it’s full steam ahead with the filming. Christmas home movies must be so much fun at those households.

  4. How do you find the time? I check here, my e-mail, the Benbo/Gailbo (where I get all the links to stupid stuff I need), Moorcock’s site, and now I’m pestering the hell out of these guys who write Pendergast. Sometimes I check local news sites. Gone are my visits to Gateworld, other comic book forums, anything Depp, and othe sites of interest – I just don’t have the time. And yet…YOU still seem more productive than me!

    I must be doing something wrong. 😛

    Of course, maybe it’s because I also surf the net, looking for canidates to play Elric in the unlikely chance they ever make a movie. How about this lovely thing, model Andrej Pejic? (Definitely NSFHIYHTLWSWTCWACFAFHPCOTV)

    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v54/dasNdanger/AndrejPejic.jpg

    Actually, he’d make one hellava hawt Wraith, too. 🙂

    Harder to find Pendergast canidates. Someone on Deviantart did a photo manip and came up with this for a young Aloysius:
    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v54/dasNdanger/YoungPendergast_by_burnishedvelvet.jpg

    I think it suits him, though in Pendergast’s case I’d like to see him a bit older since that’s how I imagine the character. It’s just impossible to find the right look. This pic of Bettany probably comes closest, though Pendergast is described as ‘beautiful’, with a thinner face and finely chiseled features:

    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v54/dasNdanger/bettany.jpg

    AAAAAND…you really don’t care, do you?? 😛 Sorry, I AM obsessing. THIS is probably why I get nothing done.

    das

  5. LOLOL I think people should be able to film births, and I think we should get to reenact it in reverse with child, even if child now an adult, if they make us watch it. Ty for wishes for Leora, she is doing better, much meds from doctor helps.

  6. I hope you and your family are still having all kinds of fun.. Do you all play board games or Wii,, I think I would just hang out in the kitchen at your house, I imagine the food selection is quite good. And the bar didn’t look too shabby either. Macarons for the holiday? How is Jelly feeling? Those websites,hmm, such a diverse selection. But we must keep up to date on the latest whatever. I really didn’t want to be filmed for my baby delivery, no,not really, I can remember enough of it,,thanks, eww! I hope your weather hasn’t been too bad to get out. I see lots of snowy crap on the west coast, but funny thing they never show Canada..so I will just guess at it.
    Enjoy!

  7. Oh my gosh, that blog at filthyrichmond.com is hilarious!! I laughed so hard at what she wrote and what the commentors said. They are always giving her heck about her looks and her opinions and after a particularly funny post Drive politely!. one commentor replied, “Have you been taking GED classes? Your writing has improved quite a bit lately.” 😆

    Don’t guess anyone has ever said that to you Joe? Hmmm, in your line of work, maybe they have… 🙂

  8. When our kids were born last year, the staff expected me to take pictures during the event. In fact, one of the anaesthesiologists described taking pictures as my job on the team. I’m very glad that we have a photographic record of our twin daughters’ first moments on this Earth. That said, those pictures are for family only, and I can’t imagine ever sharing them with others.

  9. @ Tammy Dixon – *buuurp!* I’m not tellin’! 😀

    Dang. Where’d all these fleas come from???

    😉

    @ PBMom – Feeling better physically, seeing the doc tomorrow. I still have some concerns about other things the CAT scan discovered, but I’m trying not to fret too much. Mentally I’ve been trying to ward off some depression that seems to want to take hold of me ever since I’ve been home from the hospital. I think I was SO relaxed and worry-free in the hospital that my brain is rebelling against facing real life again. Or maybe it’s something else – just underlying worry about a lot of stuff (work, health, finances, family, pets, car…you get the idea). I’ve been determined never to take meds for my anxiety, ADD, or depression, but to deal with it through relaxation techniques and other non-medical means. However, I do NOT want to return to the 10-year funk I just emerged from last spring. I’m weighing my options, and finding it really difficult to even consider going to a head shrink for something I should be smart enough to figure out on my own. Heck, I’ve been dealing with this forever, so why give in and seek help now? (Besides, most head doctors are nuttier than their patients!) I’m sure I’ll figure something out.

    Snow hasn’t been a big problem here – we didn’t get as much as North Jersey (some places got 3 feet – unheard of around here!). As it is, I think we got somewhere between 12″-18″ – up near Atlantic City had about 2 feet. Most of the main roads are fine, though our street is still a sheet of snow/ice/slush, depending. We’re supposed to get up around 50 over the weekend, so I suspect this stuff won’t be around much longer.

    Thanks for asking, btw – appreciate it. 🙂

    das

  10. No way would I ever want anyone to film or photograph any of my children’s births. No f’ing way. I do not want to relive that for anything, nor would I want anyone to suffer through it. I hated when my husband took a picture the day after with the kid.

    You should check out Hyberbole and a Half blog. I think you’d like it. The last post was about how Kenny Loggins ruined Christmas. Or how dogs cannot travel or move. There are some gems from Allie. I’ve laughed so hard, I’ve cried reading her posts. Thanks for the other links. More fun stuff to check out.

  11. Actually when I have kids someday, though I think that I’ll need employment and then a girlfriend first, I’d like to record the birth of my children. Call me sentimental but I’d like to have a record of their first moments. Though why someone would want to show anyone those videos is beyond me… close family or couple only.

    I’m curious is filthyrichmond.com real or is it someone writing as a character? I truly couldn’t tell at first glance.

    Interesting distraction websites. I tend towards video game websites like IGN.com and gamespot.com and http://www.escapistmagazine.com

    Cody

  12. Hey Joe,

    I was thinking THAT would be leaning on the personal side…where do you surf? I enjoyed reading the list..mine includes yours…hehe AND that is as far as I will go.

    The baby filming…ugh!!! I can’t imagine wanting to film it. Take a few snaps…yes! Sound, crying…which would be me…makes me sick to think about it. See…now I will have to torment my family with an embarrassing blog about their births. I will link here of course to give credit where credit is due. *smiles*

    Best to you Joe,
    You always make me smile…
    Cheryl 🙂

  13. Thanks!
    I was actually getting a bit bored with my usual 5/6 techy blogs per-day, so this post couldn’t have come at a better time!
    Now, not only is there a bookmark named “Joe Mallozzi’s Blog”, there’s a whole folder underneath it named “Joe’s Picks”
    ..

    ….
    Geeze, when I did become such a Joe Fan!?

  14. Joe would like to take this opportunity to congratulate you on the Russian New Year. and wish you long life! and what would be your serial please us for many years.

  15. Joe – I hope you are enjoying your holiday season. I expect that once you hear something that you will address the elephant in the room. 🙂

  16. I saw that news item about the ban on photos until 5 minutes after birth. I’ve got mixed feelings. As the mom, I definitely don’t want pictures of my privates floating around forever. I had a strict no-photos policy for my hubby. But we did take pictures of the kids just after, when they were placed on the scale, shivering and kicking and wondering what the heck was going on. I have to say the kids themselves LOVE these pictures. They are fascinated by them, even 10 years later. But they may feel differently if they ever appear during a rehearsal dinner slideshow. Ha! The parents’ revenge …

  17. It’s hard to decide who to love more: jocelyn or her commenters at flithyrichmond.com
    I just wish she taught parenting classes. And etiquette. The world would be a better place. And by better I mean terrifying.

  18. funny post but after maxim it sort of went downhill haha. but seriously how do you find these random blogs and then do the daunting task of reading through their posts to determine if they are funny or not? Some of them I like and some are weird and need getting used to. I also like The Onion but I generally don’t like the over-saturation of comedy in sites so I tend to be an “occasional” visitor. Which is why I never make it to Cracked.com and actually stay there.

    I think I’m a boring internet surfer, because I go to all the common places. I like aintitcoolnews.com, funny stuff is there at the comment section not the articles. Also, well I used to go to abovetopsecret.com but its mostly full of stoners & anarchists who believe their own bs. I started going to joystiq.com but its still not as good as kotaku.com, hopefully one day it will get better.

    And Foxnews.com, I go there to read the racist paranoid comments. And every now and then they have some promiscuous sex article that gets everyone mad! oh and gateworld.com obviously. But if I’m writing something and in need for inspiration I just head over to this site right here: http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html

    but I’m still searching for that totally awesome site that will make me completely abandon real life.

  19. Eric got photographed at birth. I think he’s confiscated the pix. I didn’t care either way, birthing was 1 of worst experiences of my life when I got forced to a C-sec for breach. All those natural birth classes wasted.

    thx for snow update @das I was curious how much rec’d there. Glad you’re feeling better. Positive rules.
    DD

  20. BTW…the filthyrichmond blogger character is a lot like my sister-in-law…let’s just say I married the good-twin.

    Hope she’s not googling my Avatar…

  21. Looks like your mom, sis, Akemi and the pups had a wonderful Christmas.

    Happy New Year to everyone!

  22. Shame on you for giving me more distractions! Cool links but some of the bloggers are not for me.

    We took a few birth pictures of the baby. I certainly wouldn’t make dinner guest look at them.

    Interesting use for the birth pictures, JeffW. I have a son, would it work for his potential girlfriends, as well, I wonder…..?

    Das: good luck with scan today.

  23. @Tammy Dixon:

    Interesting use for the birth pictures, JeffW. I have a son, would it work for his potential girlfriends, as well, I wonder…..?

    Hard to say; teenage girls don’t seem to be as grossed-out by the birth pictures as the boys are…but he probably won’t bring home anymore girls after the first time 😉

  24. I had Patrick in a freestanding birthing center. I had fully intended to tape labor and birth and have him as a waterbirth. My oh my, the ideals one has without knowing what it is really going to feel like without drugs….for that long (29 hrs from when the contractions were 8 minutes apart until he was born). I have a tape recording of my dog throwing up as I start to have contractions at home (sympathy I suppose), and I have film of Patrick after he was no longer blue and limp with no reflexes. I do not think I’ve ever gone back to look at it. We still have the same camcorder though 15 years later.

    This trend with the hospitals does not surprise me. When I was pregnant in the mid-1990’s, doctors would no longer give you videotapes of your child during your OB visits for the same reason. I’m not sure what those policies are like now.

  25. @ Tammy Dixon – I only went to the doc – no scan…unless certain things don’t clear up. He’s giving me a week. 😛 Feeling pretty good today, so hopefully all is well!

    das

  26. @Das Thanks for the update. There is nothing wrong with going to talk to someone. I like to think of it as a sounding board of objectivity. Sometimes being too close to the subject matters is part of the problem. Although they don’t tell you what to do, sometimes they know how to ask just the right question to help you make those critical decisions. A professional, accredited version of this blog. LOL.

    I think I told you I have a sister in Toms River, and she told me they got about 18-20 inches of snow.

  27. Man, I went to maxim and saw Alaina on the first page.. man shes good looking. 😉

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