Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog

Spent half the day undergoing my annual health assessment.  As far as I can tell (pending the results of the blood test), I’m as healthy and hopelessly out of shape as ever!

Other things I have learned:

I read better when I wear my reading glasses.

My sense of balance is atrocious, making me a poor candidate for that heist team member who has to negotiate a building-bridging telephone line like a tightrope walker.

I really don’t like needles.  ESPECIALLY when they’re piercing my flesh.  And ESPECIALLY when they’re used with the express purpose of drawing blood from my arm only to fail – twice! – and have to tap a vein in my OTHER arm!

I also really don’t like the sight of my own blood leaving my body.

It’s very hard to keep your eye open/from watering when you know it’s going to be blasted with a puff of air.

My grip strength is decidedly average.

During an ultrasound, never joke about wanting to know the sex of the baby.

I have a truly terrible sense of coordination, making me a poor candidate for that heist team member who has to negotiate the laser maze.

When you’re unable to provide a urine sample is when they need it and when you ARE able to provide a urine sample, they don’t want it.  (Solution: Always carry one around with you, just in case!)

The likelihood of your agent getting back to you in a speedy manner is inversely proportional to your desire to get an answer to that question you asked him.

I received the terrible news this morning while I was still in bed.  “The internet is down,”said Akemi.

“Did you try rebooting?”I asked.

When she told me she had, I didn’t think much of it.  There have been countless times where I have had to act as IT guy for her various computer issues.  Granted, the depth of my repertoire consists of asking her to reboot and, if that doesn’t work, hopping on google, but it has sufficed in the past.  And so, I assumed, it would this time as well.  Until I rolled over to check my phone and realized…

The internet was down!

I jumped out of bed and unplugged, then plugged in the router.  Nothing!

I texted Ivon to find out if he was experiencing trouble with his wireless.  HIS wireless was fine!  WTF???  We have the same internet provider!

So I called our internet provider and was informed they were aware of the problem and it was a service issue.  I pointed out that my friend, who lives in the same building, has experienced no problems with HIS internet.  Their response was the equivalent of a half-hearted shrug and a “What can you do?”  Still, they assured me that their crack team was working on it and that my internet access would be restored…

…eventually…

IN 24 TO 48 HOURS!!!

Holy Hell!  I may as well be on Mars or in the middle of the Sahara or my mom’s place in Montreal!

I tell ya, there’s nothing like being cut off from the rest of humanity to really make you take stock in things like life’s capricious nature and that script rewrite you’ve got to deliver before week’s end.

Well, tomorrow I am off for my annual physical.  I’ll be getting pinched, prodded, and bled after which they will test my physical endurance by making me run (for the first since we knocked over that liquor store back in 2016!).  I will have to submit a three day food journal that Akemi has forced me to answer truthfully (“Hey!  Where’s your afternoon lattes?!!!) and then demonstrate such feats of physical prowess as my inability to touch my toes or stand on one foot with my eyes closed.

Wish me luck!

Apologies for the late blog entry but I was out tonight with the lovely and talented Roger Cross who is in Toronto shooting a t.v. series, between his various other t.v. show appearances.  Despite his busy schedule, he still found the time to take Akemi and I out for dinner.  A class act.  Hopefully, before he heads back to Vancouver, he has time to swing by our place and put a dent in the 70 or so collected bottles that survived the Dark Matter Whiskey Club.

On our way back home, I noticed Halloween parties were in full swing.  It has been, admittedly, a while since the last time I dressed up, but I will always have fond memories of those early outfits.  They included: Captain Kirk, Han Solo, and Wolverine.  Really, the cool character trifecta.  What more is there to add?

One of the things I miss about living in an apartment rather than a house is the opportunity to hand out treats to costumed kids.  Not that I have any great affection for children.  Just the opposite.  Back in Vancouver, I used to answer the door with a platter of raw vegetables and canned fish.  I remember it backfiring when one kid’s eyes positively lit up: “I love smoked oysters!”  In retrospect, I should have gone with hard cheeses.

So, with Halloween just around the corner, what are YOU dressing up as?  Harley Quinn?  Brite Bomber from Fortnite?  Michael AvenattiM?

Matinees I want to check out this week that I probably won’t have time to go see so why am I doing this to myself?: Burning, Venom, Halloween, Bad Times at the El Royale, Suspiria, A Simple Favor.

Please weigh in with your early reviews!

Many of you know Robert C. Cooper as a writer and/or Executive Producer on such shows as Stargate: SG-1, Stargate: Atlantis, Stargate: Universe, and Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency.  Well, his new project, Unspeakable, sees him reunite with a number of familiar faces including Paul McGillion, Lexa Doig, Aaron, Douglas, and Michael Shanks on a poignant eight-part limited series.

About the show

Unspeakable is set to premiere January 9th, 2019 .

It’s an important project for Rob, one he’s been trying to get made for years, and I hope you’ll all take the time to check it out when the time comes.

So we’ve booked our first trip to Japan in two years.  We’ll be gone for ten days – which means that Suji will be without us for TEN WHOLE DAYS!  She and Lulu will be in great hands, but I do wonder how she’ll do without us to boss around.

Our ten day trip will come at the tail end of my fantasy football league regular season – and just in time for the playoffs!  How, you’re no doubt wondering, are the Snow Monkeys doing?  Well, I’m glad you asked.  Across both leagues…

Is it possible?  A double championship for my Snow Monkeys?

I’m feeling it!

Well, I must admit that your varied bucket lists made for some fine reading.  When the time comes, schedule permitting, I may tag a long on your various globe-trotting/culinary/ill-advised adventures!

This morning we delivered the first draft of the UF episode 1 script as well as the outlines for episodes 2-5.  Hopefully we get the notes on all turned around in a speedy manner so that we can move on to rewrites and script go’s.  The plan, so far as I’m concerned, will be to do the rewrite on episode 1, write episode 3, and then do passes on all 9 episodes before scripting the season 1 finale.  Start prep in November, have all scripts done by January, and then start production in mid-February.  Piece of cake!

This afternoon, we finally had that much rescheduled conference call related to that comic book adaptation.  It’s a terrific book, and the writer and artist are equally wonderful.  At this point, it’s a matter of reviewing and revising the existing series overview before talking about how we want to approach the pilot.   I think we’re all in agreement that the first issue of the comic book offers the ideal blueprint.  This one is going to be a blast.

I wrote up the character summaries for Untitled Awesome Project.  It’s a little more intimate than the bigger family unit we saw on Dark Matter, but these characters will be no less endearing.  I already have the pilot episode’s opening tease, fifth act out, and episode tag in my head – which fairly parallels my approach to the Dark Matter opener. Shocks, surprises, and oodles of fun!

The pitch for that supernatural small town mystery is pretty much complete.  We finished up the bulk of the bulky 25+ page series overview months ago and it is now in the fine-tuning stages.  This one is…very ambitious.  I’ve never seen an approach like it.

Finally, there’s that horror novel adaptation.  The deal is closed almost closed close to almost being closed, but given the workload ahead of me on UF, I realistically won’t be able to start on this one for a while.  Still, it will be nice to meet up and chat with the author.  But only after I read his latest award-winning release.

At this rate, I don’t know when I’ll get around to checking out Killing Eve and Chilling Adventures of Sabrina!

A difficult day for reasons I’ll not elaborate on in this blog entry.  Suffice it to say, however, that days like these make you stop and think about not only what you’ve done with your life, but what remains to be done.

MY BUCKET LIST

• Buy a place in Tokyo and spend more time visiting and exploring the country.
• Take a tour of the southern U.S.  Hit Charleston, Savannah, and New Orleans.
• Spend a couple of weeks in Tuscany.
• Attend one Worldcon and finally meet many of the authors whose work I’ve enjoyed the years.
• Create and produce at least one more dear-to-me sci-fi series.
• Produce, at the very least, a Dark Matter miniseries to give the series closure.
• Get the band back together and join them for at least one season of a new Stargate series.
• Rescue a whole bunch of senior pugs.

I reserve the right to revise and amend this list.

So, what’s on YOUR bucket list?

Bad news, guys!  No one won the Mega Million jackpot.

Good news, guys!  No one won the Mega Millions jackpot.  We’re still in play!

Things you can possibly buy with your 1.6 billion cash prize…

Almost any team in the NHL.

One of roughly 20 NBA franchises including the Spurs, Pistons, and Raptors.

Select from about half the teams in Major League Baseball.

The Buffalo Bills.

More specialty channels than you would think (Plus the perk of being able to cancel the professional cancelers!).

Several comic book companies.

At least twelve seasons of an awesome sci-fi series.

Swimming pools full of this bottled water: https://luxurystndrd.com/only-beverly-hills-90h20-would-come-up-with-a-100k-water/

Balmoral Castle.

A small, modest country like Lichtenstein.

Let’s not waste time, people!  The time to start planning is now!

I’m pleased to report that you needn’t worry about me and, specifically, my right shin.  According to the doctor, it’s a bone bruise that should clear up in 3-4 weeks.

Unless, of course, it’s a stress fracture.  In which case I’ll be in a walking boot until it clears up – in 3-4 weeks.  But we won’t know for sure until he receives the x-ray results  early next week.

Guys.  Guys!  We did it!  We have a first draft of our series opener.  Almost.  This weekend, my partner in crime (also writing and hip-hop) will review what we have, make the necessary changes, and deliver it on Monday.  Meanwhile, Courtney is going to draft on Episode 2.  I’ll be switching off to revise the outline for Episode 3, while Alejandro and Nicole do the same for Episodes 4 and 5.

Also next week, I start work on Untitled Awesome Project.  I had a great meeting with the gang on Thursday and everyone is very excited to move forward.  We discussed the overview, tone, themes, and possible landing spots for the series.  As I said, if you enjoyed episodes like Dark Matter’s All The Time in World and Isn’t That A Paradox, or Stargate’s Window of Opportunity, and Wormhole X-Treme, you’re gonna love it!

Thursday was a busy day.  In addition to the writing and the meeting, I also had a call with a comic book company about the possibility of collaborating on an original comic book series along the lines of what I did with Dark Matter.  I”ll take the next couple of weeks to fine-tune my pitches (I have three!) and deliver them in early November.

And…other stuff.

So, what are your weekend plans?  Do you usually follow routine or are you spur-of-the-moment types?

I was stumbling back from the bathroom in pitch darkness when my shin connected with the bed frame with such force that I thought I actually moved the damn thing.  But no.  Akemi was still fast asleep.  Not a surprise.  She is, after all, a notoriously sound sleeper, snoozing through everything from doggy accidents to car alarms.  But the next day, she asked me if I’d run into the bed.  “Oh, you WERE awake,”I said.  Turns out, no. She just noticed the dried blood on the frame.

The impact had left a nasty bruise and slight indent that I treated with polysporin and hope, then thought nothing of it.  In the ensuing weeks, I did A LOT of walking.  To the writers’ room and back.  To the grocery store and back.   To the dog park and back.  And I started to notice a certain pain that I initially attributed to shin splints.  Further (internet) research suggested that what I had initially assumed to be a shin splint is probably a stress fracture, and the only way to relieve a stress fracture is rest.  I need to keep off it – which is, as it turns out, easier said than done.  This was made abundantly clear yesterday after, a day of meetings had sent me zigzagging across the downtown area, I returned home late last night to pain, swelling, and a girlfriend insisting I get it checked.

So, tomorrow, at noon, I get it checked out.  I’ve got a little over five weeks before my Tokyo trip and have to be fully healed before then.  I average around 25 000 daily steps on my Tokyo travels and I can’t afford to be hampered by a leg injury.  Unless, of course, Akemi is willing to piggyback me around Ginza and Akihabara.

I’m just going to consider that as a last resort.

In the meantime, I’ll try to make the best of things – and rely on my downstairs neighbor, Ivon, to help me out whenever I need to run errands…

I was assailed by another kind of pain this evening, that singular agony that comes from trying to crack a pesky fifth act scene.  Only six more pages and I’ll be free to catch a Halloween matinee.  So near and yet so far!