Crap.  No sooner is my “red eye” condition on the mend than I suffer a shoulder injury while working out.  “Your muscle is sore,”said Akemi. “That’s good!”  No, it’s not the good kind of sore.  It’s the “I have to sleep on my back because it hurts when I roll over” and “I’m so stiff I have to turn my entire body instead of just my turning head so I look like a damn robot” sore. On the bright side, I’m a firm believer in the “things balance out in the end” philosophy.  Given the way the past few months have gone, I fully expect all three of my shows to get picked up this month!

The sweet smell of success (aka maple syrup!).
The sweet smell of success (aka maple syrup!).

For months now, Akemi has been going on about the fact that the new Canadian 100 dollar bills smell like maple syrup.  According to “sources” at her language school, it’s only the 100’s and they emit the faint scent of Canadian national symbol when the bill is rubbed. Sort of like a scratch and sniff.  Despite my attempts to set her straight, she remained adamant, even going so far as to dismiss one of the disappointingly unscented bills I had in my wallet as potentially counterfeit.  I put the topic out of my mind until last week when I came across this article:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2331770/New-Canadian-100-dollar-bills-reek-like-maple-syrup-national-bank-says-notes-fragrance-free.html

Apparently, Akemi isn’t the only one who has jumped on the “100 dollar bill smells like maple syrup” bandwagon.  As per the aforementioned article, Bank of Canada officials “have repeatedly denied that there is any particular scent to the money”.  Interestingly enough, other bills have long been associated with specific scents of Canadiana.  The $50 dollar bill, for instance, supposedly smells like salmon.  The $20, like bacon.  The $10, like poutine.  And the $5, like former Prime Minister Sir Wilfrid Laurier’s socks.

Anyway, we were out for dinner the other night and, when my buddy pulled out a $100 to pay for the meal, Akemi snatched it and started sniffing.  I explained to situation to my bewildered friend.  “She thinks it smells like maple syrup,”I informed him.  “It DOES smell like maple syrup!”she insisted, handing me the bill.  I sniffed, smelled nothing, and told her as much.  “You have to rub the maple leaf,”she said.  I wasn’t buying it but decided to humor her, rubbing the leaf before giving it a sniff and – Holy Shit!  It smelled like – well, not quite maple syrup – more like chocolate – but pretty damn close!  My friend was equally amazed.

Until Akemi pulled out the tube of chocolate lip balm she had secretly applied to the bill while we weren’t looking.

Only a couple of days to go before my sis takes part in the annual Dragon Boat Race in support of The Missing Children’s Network!

Help her out by donating on-line towards One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish at https://secure9.securewebexchange.com/enfant-retourquebec.ca/index.php?lang=en.

Please put her name (Andria Mallozzi) in the message section.

21 thoughts on “June 4, 2013: Now what?! The Sweet Smell of Success? Support my sis!

  1. Akemi’s not crazy! Well, she may be crazy for other reasons (I can’t speak to that), but not for the maple-hundred-dollar-bill thing. I have definitely smelled maple flavoring (or flavouring) on some $100s. It’s been exclusively crisp, brand new bills, though, not ones that have been circulated. It doesn’t wallop you over the head with maple scent; it was rather subtle, but there nonetheless. I scratched/rubbed the see-through maple leaf part before I sniffed, but I don’t know if you necessarily have to do that.

  2. Those bills look like they would be pretty hard to counterfeit but I guess that’s the idea! Maybe they don;’t want to admit to the maple scent for security reasons.

    I’m all for helping to find missing children and providing help to their families. I’m happy to support Andria’s Dragon Boat. One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish is one of my favorite Dr Seuss books. Right up there with Go Dog Go.

    Hey Joe, you didn’t mention that she’s the Captain! Please post pictures after the race if you can.

    Good luck Andria!

    And I hope your neck feels better soon, Joe.

  3. Given the way the past few months have gone, I fully expect all three of my shows to get picked up this month!

    you are due for some good luck.

  4. FYI for the NON-Canucks — Those Bills are also completely PLASTIC! And, have a habit of static-clinging to each other… Or STAY folded!

    However, IF “SOMEONE” were to *give* me one of them $100.-bills, I’m sure that I could quickly OVERcome my opinions!! 😀 Say, Joe!? Need Someone to babysit that Wallet of yours?

  5. I had heard that on the news last week, they were saying that the warmth of your hand is what is supposed to release the scent. Don’t know haven’t seen one yet. It has gotten that a lot of places won’t accept the larger bills, so I’ve just always asked the bank for no larger than the $20 denomination. I’m not a fan of the polymer, they stick together so bad.

    Well, it comes in threes… eye… shoulder… you’re due for one more… good luck…

    K

  6. You’re falling apart Joe. :p Hope the eye and shoulder recover quickly.

    Bacon scent on money. I can go for that. 😀

    Good luck to Andria and her team. 🙂

  7. Sorry about your shoulder, Joe. As I always say, exercise is bad for your health. That’s why I never do it. More people die while doing exercise than while sitting on the sofa watching TV. It’s a fact! Don’t risk it! 🙂

    Did you know that polymer banknotes were invented in Australia? So they should smell of eucalyptus and kangaroo dung! Fun fact that you can share with your friends around the dinner table next time.

  8. The $50 dollar bill smells like salmon??? That seems kinda fishy!!
    …sorry, couldn’t resist…

    Hey, when you read “$50 dollar bill” out loud do you have to say dollar twice?

  9. Joe…you shouldn’t have been working out when you had a sore eye! Seriously, that could have been disastrous. As for your projects, the right door will open at the right time. I really believe that, and with your talent it’s only a matter of time.

  10. That’s funny. The American $100.00 bill smells like cocaine, failure and despair.

    Sorry to hear about the shoulder. I did some yard work this weekend and torqued my back pretty good. Getting old sucks. But I guess it beats the alternative.

  11. Given the fairly subjective sense of smell, it’s not surprising that anyone can experience a certain smell from a given odour, especially if they’re expecting it. The bill being made of a polymer, it probably does give off a certain sweet, chemical smell that could be interpreted as maple, especially when new.

    Sorry to hear about your shoulder – is it your trapezius you mean, the one that runs across your shoulder/back and up your neck? My left one has bothered me off and on for about a year. A lot of it is ongoing tension, I’m convinced.

    Donation made!

  12. That is pretty funny about the Canadian dollar. So did Akemi discover this on her own or did she hear about it somewhere? I don’t usually smell money. It’s not something I would think of.

    Sorry about your shoulder, Mr. M.. I feel for you. I woke up with a kink in my neck about four weeks ago. It still bothering me and making daily activities a little difficult. Swimming is ok but driving hurts. I hope your shoulder strain goes away more quickly than my neck pain. It’s good news about your eye though!

    Kathode: How are the insect bites? I’ve had some bad bites before too. I stepped into an ant nest once and it took 3 years to heal. I saw my primary doc and a dermatologist. They said the circulation was bad in my feet and it wasn’t getting rid of the ant venom. Miserable!

    I’ll check out your sister’s race! Good for her though 🙂 .

    1. Tam: Well, I only needed the ice pack (to quell the itch) for a little while last night, instead of most of the night. And today things have calmed down quite a bit compared to yesterday. Now I just have ginormous sores on each bite site. You wouldn’t think that a bug so small its name is “noseeum” could create such a massive wound!

      I bought several varieties of bug-murdering, bylaw-violating lawn spray at Home Depot yesterday, and my husband kindly squirted the front yard last night. Hopefully we’ll get the back yard tonight. Something’s got to change, or this could seriously be a reason to look for a new place to live. (And we just bought this place last summer.) I don’t want to have to slather on Jungle Juice every time I go in the yard.

      More fun today: our crawl space has a big pool of water in it, and according to the plumber, that pool contains a dead rat. Isn’t that pleasant? So a water damage restoration place has to come pump it out before the plumber will even consider going in there to figure out what’s leaking. This week just keeps getting better and better. Is there a curse on Vancouver or something? Joe’s shoulder/eye, my bites/flood-rat. A least we’ve got sunny warm weather to soften the blow.

  13. @Kathode: Yay on the bites. Boo on the rat 🙁 .

    @Mr M: Oh and Congrats on the projects!

  14. Hey Joe,
    You’re sort of an expert when it comes to dessert, right? I want to surprise my sister with a cake for her birthday, any recommendations? I’m diabetic, so I have no clue!
    Thx

    1. What does she like? Can’t go wrong with flourless chocolate cake or maybe a hazelnut torte.

  15. Flourless chocolate cake? Agreed! Get raspberries to go on the side. I’ve never had the hazelnut torte but sounds yummy.

  16. I just cannot do maple syrup. Nauseating. I smelled it in Patrick’s school this week when I was volunteering and thought I was going to have to leave. It was not a diabetic’s person pee that was left on the floor, but rather someone’s oatmeal. See, now I bet you won’t be able to smell maple syrup ever the same way again. I figured you all should join in my misery.

    Sorry to hear about your shoulder. If it’s not one thing, it’s another sometimes.

    Now if it smelled like chocolate, I would want one. But watch out for US money Akemi:

    http://www.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/08/14/cocaine.traces.money/

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