Last night was what Carl Binder referred to as “the perfect storm of television”. On tap: The Office, My Name Is Earl, 30 Rock, Survivor, Grey’s Anatomy, AND American Idol.

The best line of the night came on My Name is Earl. Beau Bridges, as Earl’s father, gifts his son with his grandfather’s baby rattle – giving it a shake and informing him “Those are Indian teeth.”

The best moment of the night came in The Office. A confused little kid wakes up in the dead of night, glances across the room and finds Dwight Schrute sitting a rocking chair, watching him sleep: “You’re awake. Finally.”

The best sequence of the night was 30 Rock‘s nod to The Bodyguard. Tracy Jordan is swept off his feet and whisked off to safety by two beefy behemoths as Whitney Houston sings I Will Always Love You.

The best awkward moment of the night came during Survivor. As the two tribes face off in a contest that requires them to negotiate a slippery track, perennial loser Sylvia attempts to slide across the slick expanse on her belly – only to travel a few feet before stopping cold. As her opponent charges ahead, she attempts a futile breast stroke across the greasy surface and then, realizing she isn’t moving, grins foolishly at camera. Needless to say, the rest of her tribe wasted no time in sending her packing.

Also, while watching t.v. last night, I couldn’t help but note that many of the most talented actors on my favorite shows are all too often overlooked when it comes to award shows and media coverage. For example:

Grey’s Anatomy
Who gets the press: Ellen Pompeo, Sandra Oh, Katherine Heigl.
Who should get more press: Chandra Wilson for her performance as the most believable character on television – Dr. Miranda Bailey.

The Office
Who gets the press: Steve Carell.
Who should get more press: Rainn Wilson as the unique and infinitely annoying Dwight Schrute.

My Name is Earl
Who gets the press: Jason Lee.
Who should get more press: Jaime Pressly. Holy Smokes, does she kick as Earl’s white trash ex-wife Joy.

Friday Night Lights
Who gets the press: No one.
Who should get the press: Kyle Chandler for his subtle but striking turn as Panther head coach Taylor.

Who gets the press: Hugh Laurie.
Who should get more press: Hugh Laurie.

Boston Legal
Who gets the press: James Spader and William Shatner – unarguably well-deserved.
Who should get more press: Even though he’s not a series a regular, Christian Clemenson’s turn as Jerry “Hands” Espenson is nothing short of brilliant.

Finally, I would be remiss if I failed to mention this season’s first America Votes installment of Idol. Thankfully, I didn’t watch it live so I was able to fast-forward through most of the show only to be ultimately disappointed by the manner in which Seacrest booted the losing contestants. Where was the cruel aloofness of season‘s past? The callous toying of emotions? I much preferred last season’s misdirect tactics wherein he would blindsind contestants along the lines of “Now before we find out the results of tonight‘s vote, I want to ask…Karen, I understand you’re performing tonight for your sick grandfather and I was just wondering – KARENIT’SYOU!YOU’REGOINGHOMETONIGHT! HOWDOYOUFEEL?!HOWDOYOUFEEL?! NOW SING US OUT!”

Today was wall-to-wall meetings as we prepped the opening two-parter Adrift and Lifeline. Happily, halfway through the props meeting a package arrived. It was compliments of Stargate fan Carolina and it included: duck confit, foie gras, lavender honey, almond paste cookies, dark chocolate rochers, mixed chocolate bars, and dark chocolate thins. Thanks to Carolina but I must stress that you didn‘t have to do that. Still, it was much appreciated – and enjoyed (director Martin Wood particularly enjoyed the dark chocolate thins – he’s a chocolate man). Incidentally, Carl Binder has informed me that he intends to start a blog which will focus on his great love of precious metals. Again, thanks, Carolina.

Oh, thanks to all the fans over at Gateworld who have taken the time to create threads in my honor. Special mention should be made of poster minigeek who’s thread “Fan opinion has ZERO impact on storytelling, Mallozzi says” is interesting if not misleading given that I never said these words attributed to me. In the spirit of fairplay, I have started an alternate blog titled “I eat small puppies, minigeek says” which can be found here:

Thanks to everyone who has written in and I’ve reached the point where I’m receiving more questions than I can keep up with. I’ll try my best to get around to as many as I can. David F. from my old Cinar days, I received your comment. Send me another with your email and I’ll intercept it before it reaches the public page. Now, let’s field a few questions –

Jessica writes: “You might want to ask David Hewlett about the boos he got when he mentioned that Amanda was going to be in 14 episodes at a recent con in the UK. That’s right. People booed.”

Answer: Well, David Hewlett may have been surprised when a certain group of fans booed an actress for doing nothing more than accepting a job to help support her family, but me – not so much. What can I say? Congratulations to all those who embarrassed themselves and the performers who made the long trek to spend time with you all. Classy.

Jessica also writes: “Where is the logic in getting rid of two Atlantis fan favourites and risking losing their fans, just in the hope of getting a few people from SG1 to watch.”

Answer: Allow me to clear up a assumption on your part, specifically the fait accompli belief that any creative decision made with regard to Weir was a result of Carter joining the show. In fact, the opposite is true. After a decision was made with regard to Weir, we entertained a number of possibilities – three in particular come to mind. In the end, we decided on Carter because – a) it’s something we’ve wanted to do for a while, and b) her strengths and backgrounds make her well-suited to the Atlantis environment. Holding the Samantha Carter responsible for any upcoming changes would be akin to holding the Cameron Mitchell character responsible for O’Neill’s departure or blaming the General Landry character for Hammond’s exit.

Pattirose4: “What if anything can the fans do let TPTB know that we would like a bloopers included on a season set?”

Answer: Nothing more. You told me and I had a conversation with Ivon Bartok (our Special Features Producer) regarding this very topic. I can only speak for Atlantis and, if everyone signs off, we may see bloopers in a future DVD release.

Jenny Robin writes: “I spoke with 2 people today who have read Dan Simmons’ ‘Terror’. They both said is was ‘really spooky’ and ‘great’, which, while being very general statements are still thumbs-up in nature. Have you had a chance to read it yet?”

Answer: I brought the huge hardcover tome home after showing it off to Martin Wood (who is a big Dan Simmons fan as well). I just finished Mary Doria Russell’s The Sparrow and will start The Terror tonight.

Jenny Robin also writes: “If your writing staff were to challenge each other to a series of arm wrestling matches, who would emerge victorious?”

Answer: Hmmmm. Tough call. I’d probably give it to Paul because of his competitive spirit and the spirit in his eyes. Also, he’s probably the strongest.

Anonymous #1 writes: “I wish there is an episode with nobody but McKay. McKay going offworld by himself, he’d fly a jumper too.”

Answer: How about instead of heading off-world, he’s coming back from the mainland and his jumper crashes into the ocean and we get to spend the entire episode with him alone, trapped underwater, while Atlantis scrambles to locate him before it‘s too late? We can call it…McKay’s Underwater Advenure.

Lynn writes: “Can a person hope you might stop in at the Gateworld party on Thursday night, I would love to meet you. In case you don’t remember me, I used to send e-mails your way critiquing the weekly episode and you replied on occasion, which was always fun.”

Answer: I hope to attend but have been reminded that the party takes place on the weekend of my wedding anniversary – which may mean I’ll be running late. If you used to send emails, why did you stop?

Peter writes: “Will the midway station be featured in Season 4? Also, will Caldwell be returning? And while I’m at it, a lot of fans point to the fact that the cast was fairly, uh, “stagnant” during the first 5 years of SG1, and that this was one of the reasons why the show went on for so long. Do you believe this to be true?”

Answer: The midway station will be featured in season 4. Hopefully, we will see Caldwell. And while the fans may point to the first five years as proof that a “stagnant” cast was the reason for the show’s success, I’d point to the next five years in which the show was “less stagnant” and proved even more successful.

Anonymous #2 writes: “…the fact that Amanda’s in the opening credits with 14 episodes while you still can’t come up with a number for Torri basically confirms it.”

Answer: Actually, all it confirms is that we don’t have a set number of episodes to confirm. Basically, it’s a lose-lose proposition for me. If I specify a set number of episodes or reveal my intention to bring a certain character back and, for whatever reason, plans fall through, I’m on the receiving end of brainless comments like –
Prion, February 23, 2007: “I’ve seen Mallozzi make plenty of ‘promises’ to fans that just don’t pan out for one reason or another.”
On the other hand, if I hedge my bets with a more hopeful response along the lines of “It’s possible” and “Maybe”, or try to stay mum on unaired episodes, this will result in equally brainless comments like –
Prion, February 22, 2007: “I read the chicago tribune article and he was asked about season 3, definitely, and avoided answering specific questions. his blog is amusing, but not very informative.”

Anonymous #3 writes: “How’s does being a Canadian affect the show?”

Answer: It doesn’t. Canadians are not all that different from citizens of the U.S.A.

Prior_of_the-Ori writes: “There was that mention of a ‘new race’ in Atlantis, anything else you can say about them or is it a ‘wait and see’ type thing? And is there any mythology (Egyptian, Norse etc) that you wish to explore on the show? Oh and of all the ‘bad guys’ (Adria, Kolya, ‘Steve’, ‘Micheal’, Anubis, Apophis) which one did you like the most?”

Answer: Can’t reveal much about the new race at this point. I don’t know if we’ll have the opportunity to explore Earth mythologies on Atlantis. And as for my favorite villain – Baal naturally.

Suekay writes: “What’s your favourite new show this year, and can you tell us anything about Sanctuary?”

Answer: The only new show I’m still watching is Friday Night Lights. As for Sanctuary – I believe it was a hit single for The Cult many years back. But I could be wrong.
UNSRM writes: “1. Do you wish that the proposed rebranding of SG1 went ahead after season 8? Do you think it would have made a difference to the life of series? 2. Can you tell us of any deleted scenes or bits from the script that didn’t make it into your best SG1 ep (and best SG1 ep period) Window of Opportunity?”

Answer: 1. It’s hard to say. Considering SG-1 was still doing a very respectable 1.7 average despite a slow start to season 10, it’s hard to guess whether another spin-off would have proved as equally popular. 2. There were no deleted scenes from WoW. In fact, we were short and ended up adding scenes.

Vaberella writes: “Are we going to see a mix up in the team, like Lorne/Teyla/Zelenka or Lorne/Ronon/McKay on off world missions?”

Answer: No plans to do anything like this as of yet.

Vaberella also writes: “Is there a possibility of seeing Ronon use his “specialist” skills?”

Answer: We’ll see a glimpse of his specialist skills in an episode called Reunion.

Karen writes: “Since you are such a foodie, have you seen either season of ‘Top Chef’ on Bravo? I’m thinking you might make an interesting guest judge on the next season.”

Answer: Haven’t seen it but could you put in a good word for me?

UberAmandaFan writes: “SciFi won’t start SGA up until FALL??? […] Do you know why they’re doing this?”

Answer: I believe it has something to do with the network’s decision to give their fans year-round original programming.

ChaosIsBeauty: “What authors/screenwriters, past or modern, do you feel have had the greatest influence on you personally and as a writer?”

Answer: Probably my biggest influence was Syd Field who’s simple, straightforward book on screenwriting gave me all the advice I needed to get started.

Skully writes: “Can a buy you dinner sometime on one of my passes through Vancouver?”

Answer: Sure. Just post a comment with your email. It will appear in my inbox before I okay it for posting. I’ll just take down your email and delete the comment so that you don’t end up fielding dinner requests from hungry Stargate fans.

Blaine Nielsen writes: “I know that your really not involved in the movies that are coming out, but you said that you have read the script/story for them. What does the lengh look like? Is it going to be like a 2 parter episode or something like Avalon and Origin? And second I was watching Threads the other day. […] When Jacob Carter is about to die and Jack and Sam are talking about her father. Sam says something like she thought she lost her father 4 years ago. But wasn’t Jacob Carter blended in season 2 (almost six years earlier). Was this a goof or is time different between seasons?”

Answer: Hey, Blaine, thanks for the kind words. Regarding the script for The Ark of Truth – it won’t be a two-parter but will be twice as long as a regular episode. As for the Threads question. You’ll have to ask Rob but it looks like an oversight.

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When I posted my comment yesterday about the out-takes I noticed the 30 odd comments and had a feeling you be cutting back at some point especially considering the tone of the majority of them. Not that you’d cut back due to the tone but simply the sheer volume of them and your time constraints.
Anyway, thanks for answering my query and getting word to the person responsible for that, I appreciate it. And FWIW I’m thrilled Weir is getting less screen time.


“or blaming the General Landry character for Hammond’s exit.”

LOL. Oh, dear…now I’m picturing Landry clubbing Hammond over the head, usurping his position, and holding him hostage in his closet a la Wesley in season 4 of Angel. And for some reason that image amuses me greatly.

Regarding Weir, I’ll be sad to see her go, but it’s not a show-breaker for me. I’m certainly curious and excited to see what you do with Carter on Atlantis (as long as McKay moves beyond the weird creepiness he always seems to fall into around her). I do hope we get to see more of Caldwell, too. He was cool. And Teal’c. It would be nice to see Teal’c finally visit Atlantis. Ooh, Ronon vs. Teal’c sparring match. THAT I’d like to see.

Boston Legal rocks beyond the telling. You’re right, “Hands” is great. Although Betty White’s character was also very amusing. I just love the quirkiness of the show. (And I just can’t help imagining how funny an SG-1/BL crossover would be. I mean, even besides the whole “Spader was Daniel” thing. Oh, how I wish TV shows actually did crossovers.)


you go, joe!! grin

(i think i’m going to save a couple of your responses for later enjoyment :p)

sally grin


Joe, of the ten or so scripts you guys have written, how many is Carter in?


What episode numbers will Carter not be in? I need to know what weeks to skip. Yeah, that’s right. I only watch for Carter. Or O’neill. I’ll watch for him too. Or Teal’c. Yep, even Daniel. But that’s about all. Sorry, no amount of rehashed Replicator action can get me tuning in. Unless of course it’s Replicarter. Then I’m there. I think you get where I’m coming from.


You know, as much as I laughed my butt off at the new, “alternate” blog, you know that Gateworld is probably going to explode now?

I mean, it’s all fun and games to a lurker, but as a poster, it’s going to be hell. Still…it was hilarious…hmm…I guess it balances out.

Anyway, a question: will the season 4 opening credits have a brand new effect to it, or is it just going to be the same as the last 2 seasons but with different actors being displayed?


Stargate has traditionally been a story of a battle between good and evil. Do you have any plans to incorporate more shades of grey into the story-telling?


Why did you decide to demote Torri’s role to recurring and now, from the latest rumour it sounds like after 4 episodes she will be gone from the show? It’s so rare to see a female character dressed non-sexually and in a position with some authority in a sci-fi series. A lot of women identified with her.



I was at the convention where fans booed when mention was made to the changes happening and it just felt awful. The guests were shocked and, to me anyways, the rest of the crowd [the majority] who disagreed or at least didn’t boo, seemed to cringe in unison. I felt so bad that I had to tell David in the autograph session that not everyone thinks like that and we’re excited about next season.

I’ve watched Sunday a couple of times since it aired this week and each time when the bagpipes start my cat, previously fast asleep next to me on the bed, wakes up and goes beserk! Climbing all over me, scratching at the door and crying!

“I eat small puppies, minigeek says” Awesome.

Arctic Goddess
Arctic Goddess

Joe: Stand still for a big hug. I knew we were kindred spirits when you said that Ba’al was your favourite villain. Nobody does bad better than Ba’al. And Cliff Simon does a wonderful Ba’al.

I know you don’t have much for details on the third series, but, hint hint, nudge nudge, wouldn’t Ba’al be a wonderful main character? The reluctant hero who has a difficult time trying to behave himself and fit in with the rest of the characters? What do you think?

Have a great day.


Arctic Goddess
Arctic Goddess

Hi again Joe: You mentioned a book by Syd Field as a very useful tool to help you with your writing. He has at least a dozen books for sale on the net. Which book did you use?

Thanks for being so generous with your time.




“Answer: Well, David Hewlett may have been surprised when a certain group of fans booed an actress for doing nothing more than accepting a job to help support her family, but me – not so much. What can I say? Congratulations to all those who embarrassed themselves and the performers who made the long trek to spend time with you all. Classy.”

If only I could give you a standing ovation. The inability of people to separate the actual person from the character, either that or their complete disregard for said persons feelings, appalls me more than I can say and makes me scared for society as a whole.

In regards to your interest in the annual Masters of Food and Wine, it’s a yearly event at the Highlands Inn in Carmel, CA that runs 3-4 days and is usually around February. They have master chefs fly in and they cook meals and put on exhibitions for the customers along with wine tastings and the people who come can sometimes cook along with the chefs. It’s quite the event.

Agent Dark
Agent Dark

Haha, go Joe! I guess Lemming Season is well and truly underway wink

Now onto a serious question. You’ve had a male/male kiss now on Stargate. Obviously there have been a few male/female kisses in the past. When do we get a female/female kiss?


Anonymous #2 writes: “…the fact that Amanda’s in the opening credits with 14 episodes while you still can’t come up with a number for Torri basically confirms it.”

Answer: Actually, all it confirms is that we don’t have a set number of episodes to confirm. Basically, it’s a lose-lose proposition for me.

Can we have any hope that Torri will play a major part in season four? I know everyone’s asking you the same questions with regard to this actress and her character, but surely that should help you realise how much people love her, and how many people watch in part for her interaction with the other cast members.

TV viewing is very ‘personal’ thing. Some people watch for explosions, some people watch for whumpage, some people watch for ship, others like me and most of my friends watch because we love the character interaction on this show. For me there have always been four who I’ve loved, Sheppard, Weir, McKay and Beckett. Now one is gone and another is looking like she’s on very shaky ground. I can’t for the life of me see why. What was it about these two that made you see them as expendable instead of a couple of others (who I won’t name, because I actually don’t want ANY of the cast to go) who stand around as wallpaper half the time.

And the matter of you talking about Amanda taking a job to support her family; nobody has an issue with that, but when you make that comment it almost seems like a case where Torri should have got herself a husband and a kid to ensure she stayed on as a regular.

You say that Amanda’s taken the job to help support her family, but you’ve also left one and possibly two people out of work because you think that scaring the audience by killing their favourite characters will get ratings. It won’t. We’re just going to get so pissed off that we go and watch whatever else Torri and Paul do instead of Atlantis.

And Amanda’s hardly out of work, given that she’s working on the movies, so that argument doesn’t really fly.

Jen Kirk
Jen Kirk


Thanks for the tips on cooking the shark. It turned out great. I’ll send you some authentic Old Bay seafood seasoning from Maryland as a thank you. No kitchen is complete without it.

Also, props to working in The Cult into your blog. And you’re right, She Sells Sanctuary was a big hit off their 1985 Love album…it was also used in a Nissan commercial. Just some more useless knowledge for you.


I live about 45 mins from Scranton and I gotta tell ya, Rainn Wilson is the real deal. I swear I feel like I’m up in coal-country every time I listen to him.

I have a quick question for you if you have a sec (you’re a brave man to be answering, I give you credit). As a member of the 1% of the population with a severe food allergy (nuts, go figure) it’s really great to see a regular character on a popular series with the same condition. Do you guys plan on ever having McKay react to his allergens? Most people don’t know how to help someone in anaphylactic shock and I think you’re in an excellent position to help raise public awareness. Just think, you could probably write the ep off as a PSA ;). And the FAAN would love you forever!


With the news that Galactica has been renewed, but with an episode order to be determined between 13-22, do you think Atlantis would benefit from a reduction in episodes per season? As an example, here in the UK, Dr. Who has 14 episodes a year (13 + special broadcast at Christmas) and its spinoff Torchwood has 13, which is considered very high by most standards.


I have nothing but respect for your position, even though a lot of people seem to be angry and frustrated. I can’t speak for anybody else, but after seeing that interview where you said that our letters don’t affect creative decisions, I feel quite helpless to prevent SGA from becoming a show that I don’t care to watch any more. And after seeing Beckett’s fate in Sunday for myself, I am fearful that that’s exactly what may happen.

I know that you and Paul are in charge now, but is there someone else we should write to? If letters won’t work, what else can we do? Is there anything we can do to help get Beckett back, or is it truly and completely out of our hands?

I hope you aren’t getting too frustrated by us asking all these questions about recent developments. I just want SGA to continue to be a show I’ll enjoy watching, but without Beckett, I can’t honestly say that I will.


I just want to give you a message of support, because looking around I think you need it. Being new to the fandom, I’m amazed at the venom I’ve seen – and saddened. I was at P2, and let me tell you, the boos weren’t the only embarrassing things I heard shouted out about SGA/SG1 cast members, and I was appalled and disgusted that people would do that. David Hewlett handled all of them well, and shut up the hecklers VERY quickly.
According to Weir fans EVERYONE is devastated by her reduced role. Not so. Many are very happpy, because they don’t admire the character and many just don’t care one way or the other.
I was wary about Carter coming over to Atlantis, I won’t deny it. How would it affect the dynamic I loved? Change is difficult to embrace sometimes too. Well, not any more. I want the changes, and look forward to them, and even if I didn’t, there’s nothing I can do anyway. I want to enjoy the show, so I give it a chance.
Thanks for taking the time to bother to actually converse with us. I think sometimes people expect an automatic right to full disclosure, when some things just aren’t our business.
Thank you.


At the risk of sounding both a tremendous dork (which bothers me not a bit) and like something of a suck-up (really not how I mean it!) I just wanted to drop you a line to say how much I have enjoyed what you and the other writers have been doing in the most recent seasons of both ‘Gates, and reading your blog itself. Admittedly, I have to skip bits occasionally – I’m trying to avoid spoilers, and here in NZ we’ve not even had a glimpse of S3 of Atlantis, yet – but I do appreciate what you can share with us in terms of both info and pictures.

Basically – and this comment really doesn’t need any kind of answer, I just felt it maybe had to be said – I wanted to speak up on behalf of the fans out here who are quite willing to wait and see where you and the rest of the writing team are going to take the characters and situations we care about in the new season, and take it as it comes, rather than panicking into a kneejerk reaction. Frankly, if the show overall is as strong as it’s been of late, then I’m delighted with the outcome, regardless. Obviously, no one’s going to love everything, but you guys hit the mark more often than you miss by quite a large margin, so, again – thank you, and keep up the good work.

~Claire (NZ)


“What episode numbers will Carter not be in? I need to know what weeks to skip. Yeah, that’s right. I only watch for Carter. Or O’neill. I’ll watch for him too. Or Teal’c. Yep, even Daniel. But that’s about all. Sorry, no amount of rehashed Replicator action can get me tuning in. Unless of course it’s Replicarter. Then I’m there. I think you get where I’m coming from.”

You are the reason Atlantis fans will jump ship. The SG1 people need to realise they have the movies to watch. They don’t need to destroy an existing show, which has been very good up until now, by trying to keep a show that no longer exists alive.

I’d love to see how you’d feel if the situation was reversed, and SG1 had been kept, but TPTB decided to give Joe Flanigan or David Hewlett a big role in the series and kill off Ben Browder and cut Carter to recurring.

That would be justice.

And personally, I’d like to know which episodes Carter will be in for the opposite reason. I don’t want to sit there watching McKay and Carter snarking at each other. That’s going to get old very quickly. I’ll watch any episodes Torri is in, but apart from that, this franchise no longer exists to me.


Okay, I know I said yesterday that I would stop reading your blog because of the possibility of spoilers (and also because of the attitude of some people who call themselves fans…) but Carolina dragged me here by force!!!

I was at Pegasus 2, the convention in London where people had a reaction to David’s comment about Carter coming to SGA. Actually, it was more mumbling than booing and when David asked why we were not liking Amanda, people explained that Amanda wasn’t the problem, we love Amanda, we even love Carter, but we just don’t want her on Atlantis.
I just wanted to clarify this point because you know, facts and words are easily twisted on the internet wink

Anyway, two thumbs up for your answers!

Oh and I love Miranda Bailey too! Addison is my favorite character in Grey’s Anatomy but Bailey follows close behind.


No question’s this time just a couple of comments:
1. Kyle Chandler is easily one of the most underated actors in television today. I highly recommend Early Edition, though I don’t think its out on DVD yet.

2. Same goes for Christian Clemenson. He was an absolute blast in Briscoe County Jr.



” I believe it has something to do with the network’s decision to give their fans year-round original programming.”

Fair enough – however, with BSG’s less than stellar ratings this year, aren’t you guys (a little bit) afraid for SGA’s, once it will be up against the major networks?


Hey Mr Mallozzi,

Thank you thank you thank you for your evil genius ways.

The lack of insight into the television industry by some fans never ceases to amaze me. Or amuse me.

Your ‘education’ of these fans has got to be the funniest damn thing in fandom. Ever.

Keep up the good work!