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“I love the dogs,”my mother admitted as we drove up Burrard Street, “but grandchildren are better.” I seriously doubted it but still felt the need to point out the two didn’t have to be mutually exclusive. Hell, to be honest, there are times when I think it WOULD be nice to have a kid around the house – you know, to keep the dogs company and run sundry errands. “It wouldn’t be for me,”she insisted “but for yourself.” After all, my mother reasoned, who would take care of me in my old age? Well, the obvious answer would be Fondy (that was the whole point of marrying someone nine years my junior) or one of those sexy private nurses like in the movies.  But what if these aren’t realistic options? What if Fondy joins the space program and ends up like the main character in Joe Haldeman’s Forever Peace, traveling on an FTL ship that keeps her young while I age back here on Earth (you may think this improbable but I should point out that Fondy has expressed interest in space travel in the past), or my sexy private nurse fund disappears when my investment in New Spicy 7-Up goes belly up. It would be nice to depend on my friends but I have a feeling they could be in worse shape than me down the line. So, what am I to do when the time comes? Well, that’s where all of you come in.

A simple check of WordPress’s blog stats reveals that this blog had 6 398 views yesterday. The way I see it, that’s a lot of potential TLC waiting to be tapped. Now, I don’t want any of you feeling indebted to me just because you derive countless hours of enjoyment from this blog every day (I’m assuming you’re all very slow readers). If you’d rather not help me put on my unwieldy oversized cufflinks or cut my beef tournedos into manageable bite-sized pieces when the time comes, then that’s fine (you ungrateful ingrates). I don’t need all 6 398 of you to scoop up the dog crap from my backyard, vacuum my house, or clean out my fridge – although it would certainly go a lot quicker. I could make due with less than three hundred of you. But not that much less.

Speaking of this site’s blog stats, among the interesting little tidbits it offers up is a list of incoming links, sites which have posted links to my blog. One was the intriguingly-titled: “Baron Destructo & Me” –

( http://www.joeabercrombie.com/2007/12/baron-destructo-me.html)

– which, it turns out, is the latest entry over at Joe Abercrombie’s blog. Those of you who read my December 15th entry here at WordPress know that I am in the process of reading an advance copy of Last Argument of Kings, the final book in Joe’s First Law trilogy. If you enjoy fantasy with a wicked sense of humor (say along the lines of George R. R. Martin‘s Song of Ice and Fire series or Scott Lynch‘s Lies of Locke Lamorra), do check them out.

Hey, lookit what arrived by FedEx today. First, a gift from Sci-Fi: a gorgeous special edition die-cast metal and polished chrome all lever corkscrew in a leather case. The card they sent contained the message: “Plant this card in the ground. All it needs to grow is sunlight, water, and imagination.” This should be very interesting as all of the holiday cards I’ve buried in my backyard to date have produced little in the way of anything significant. The second package was a gift from MGM: a Cinema Greats collection containing 12 Angry Men, A Bridge Too Far, Judgment at Nuremburg, Paths of Glory AND two movie tickets to Lions for Lambs (which I’ll also be burying in my backyard to see what springs up).

Last night, we took my mother to Tojo’s for high-end sushi. Check out the pics of mom digging the shrimp and lobster out of the hand cone with a fork on her way to discarding the nori (to a passing waiter‘s horror). She spent today cooking. Hmmm. I think I’ll invite Tojo over for dinner so that he can fish the pasta out of her tomato sauce with a pair of chopsticks.

Well, I spoke to soon. I thought the blogger problem had been fixed. I logged in, posted, checked to make certain the entry had published – then noticed my entire archive had disappeared. I logged out, logged back in again and discovered the archive had returned – but my new entries were gone. I logged out and logged back in again – found the new entries, but the archives were missing. Well, after a closer look, I realized that blogger had solved “my problem” by creating an alternate site for me (jmallozzi.blogspot.com). So, now I have josephmallozzi.blogspot.com that contains my archives but won’t allow me to post, jmallozzi.blogspot.com which allows me to post but doesn’t contain my archive, and josephmallozzi.wordpress.com. Well, the votes are in and, so far, WordPress leads Blogger by 22-10. I’m thinking what I’ll do is make WordPress my principal blog spot and use blogspot to back up my posts, so if you prefer to read here, then read here. If you prefer to read on blogspot (and view pics on blogspot) then read and view over there (whenever I do back up). But whichever you choose, please only comment here on WordPress as these are the comments I’ll be responding to in future entries.

Let’s hit the mailbag –

Susan the Tartan Turtle writes: “Had you not told her about your new ‘daughter’ Lulu?”

Answer: I hadn’t told her because I wanted to see her reaction. Yep, she was surprised, not only by Lulu herself but the size of her head.

Elizabeth writes: “What Isaac Asimov books would you suggest (I haven’t read very much sci-fi yet)?”

Answer: I’d suggest starting with his Robot series. Try I, Robot.

A. Loquita writes: “How do you feel about pizza?”

Answer: Hey, I’m Italian so I’m all for pizza. However, I consider thin crust an abomination.

Morgia a ecrit: “Quelle langue vous parlez entre vous dans ta famille ?”

Reponse: Anglais.

Annie from Freemantle writes: “ If there were any Aussie foodstuffs you want and can’t get in Vancouver, what would they be?”

Answer: I’m not familiar with uniquely Australian foodstuffs (with the exception of TimTams and, to be honest, I’m TimTammed out).

Jedi writes: “A group of us mailed you a card congratulating you all on S5, we were wondering if you received it yet?”

Answer: I believe Paul opened it today as he was in the office approving VFX shots for Last Man. Thanks.

RebeccaH writes: “When we see the return of Carson in The Kindred…”

Answer: Carson is coming back in The Kindred? Really?

Poundpuppy29 writes: “Are you still watching Friday Nights Lights? If Yes what do you think of the season soo far?”

Answer: I love the show but wasn’t crazy about this season’s murder sub-plot.

Grapesofwraith writes: “No corn soup for either of you at Fuel?”

Answer: Their menu is high seasonal. And I cleaned them out of the corn soup within a week.

Kdvb1 writes: “Do you charge for photos with the fans?”

Answer: To be honest, the few times I’ve attended conventions where I have posed for fan photos, I’ve felt odd charging. On the other hand, I understand that it’s one of the ways the convention organizers off-set the costs of staging such events. So, at the last con I guested at, I did not charge for my autographs and donated my portion of the photo fee to the con.

Knightie writes: “Then what happens to the Asuran ship left on the planet?”

Answer: The Asurans reclaimed it.

Ronnie writes: “My husband is a Major stationed in Iraq currently […] Anyway, he really likes Sam (who wouldn’t?) and wanted to know if on Atlantis you guys had said whether she got together with Jack.”

Answer: We have yet to say. Wish your husband all the best for a safe holiday and new year.

42zine writes: “How is Fondy’s shop doing by the way?”

Answer: Business has been very good.

Iamza writes: I finally got finished with Alas Babylon […]. This novel has a much more positive view of humanity than most post-apocalyptic novels espouse.”

Answer: It does. And, I agree. While it is dated in many respects, it offered an interesting insight into that 1950’s mindset.

Shirt ‘n Tie writes: “(1) Will your mother be cooking while staying? If so, what dishes?
(2) Having watched Mortal Coil only once, I am open to correction, but was Rodney wearing the “old” uniform at the very end of the ep.”

Answers: 1) Yes. I believe she’s making orechietti tonight. 2) It should have been the new uniform.

WannaBe writes: “ Gosh I hope you were just commenting on an overly bright bit of cover art or something, and not dissing an entire genre!”

Answer: I was referring to the cover art. As someone who works in scifi, a genre that rarely gets much mainstream respect, I am the last person who would diss another genre. So, you’re published? Anything my mom might enjoy?

Achildslife writes: “I haven’t read back in your blogs (I understand you moved over from Blogger?), but do you enjoy King Mackrel or Grouper?”

Answer: Love both.

Emily writes: “Speaking of books and Philip K. Dick, which of his books have you lined up for holiday reading?”

Answer: Ubik.

Camilla Todd writes: “Have you watched his earlier films, like The Drunken Master?”

Answer: I have watched The Drunken Master. And I thought The Drunken Master II was great as well.

Enzo Aquarius writes: “If travelling to Vancouver-area, do you have any hotel or restaurant ‘must-haves’?”

Answer: The Hotel Vancouver is nice and well-located. Restaurants: Fuel, Vij’s, Don Francesco, Cin Cin, Yuji’s, Tojo’s, West, Lumiere, Feenies, Sun Sui Wah, Sea Harbour Seafood Restaurant to name a few.

Cf100 writes: “I did want to ask, are you planning on catching the Sugar Bowl over New Years? Hawaii (12-0) against Georgia?”

Answer: Oh, I’ll definitely be watching.

jenner8675309 writes: “So you a Jackie fan, or a fan of martial arts movies in general? Do you have a preference, say Chan or Lee?”

Answer: Martial arts movies in general. Chan, Lee, and Li. And, like you, I’m a huge Steven Chow fan. Love On Delivery is one of my favorite comedies.

95 thoughts on “December 18, 2007

  1. Hey Joe –

    Is there any chance that we’ll ever see SGA with more that 20 eps a season? As I recall, the first few seasons of SG1 has 22 eps … why did they go to only 20?

  2. Am I first? Woah…

    I’m one of the “card people” Jedi referred to…glad you got it!

    Being of Italian descent myself, my luck was having Northern Italian parents. No pressure to have the ‘bambini’ if I didn’t want to! It’s gotta be what YOU want. You can’t hand them back, you know! My bro did the ‘genetic continuation’ bit (cos you guys don’t have to walk around like bloated toads for nine months then take 19 hours to “pass” a watermelon!) and I wouldn’t trade my gorgeous nephew and niece for anything. But the joy is, I DO get to give them back, and you gain much more love as ‘favorite Aunty” than you would as “mom”… So get your sibs to produce the offspring.

    Quick question…Are you guys contemplating any ‘beach’ or ‘snow’ scenarios for the Atlantis crew in season 5? (pure selfishness of course…I just wanna see JF surfing or snowboarding!!)

    And what’s your Mamma’s best recipe?

    cheers

    – Loredana

  3. Mmmmm…those pics of your mom’s cooking looks awesome. Nothing beats a homecooked meal (or at least, that’s what you should be telling your mom).

    Let’s try this again: Will wordpress be able to host videos?

  4. Oh thank god it’s a cork screw!!

    At first I thought it was either a Zat Gun or something a Gynaecologist would be proud to own.

    Nice and shiny to shame to take it out of the box just to open a bottle of cheap plonk.
    Erm sorry that should have read ‘Really expensive bottle of plonk’ sorry.

    Pauline

  5. Joe, on the matter of care for you in your golden years my approach has been to spoil my nieces and nephews and at the same time drill into them that they have no need to thank me but when the time comes and they are purchasing a house it must have a good sized aunty flat with my name on it and I will require entertainment in the form of daily outings (with wheechair provided as required) As at the last count I have about forty assorted nieces and nephews and three firm promises it looks like it will all work out.
    I think it is worth looking into at least(and before you ask you will have to use your own nieces/ nephews dont think it would work with non blood relatives)

  6. A few “ifs” in my question tonight. If Women’s Murder Club gets picked up for a full season and if the writers’ strike ends in time for them to shoot addtional episodes… what does this mean for Joe F’s role? I know his first loyalty is to Atlantis, of course, but I’m just wondering if that’s something you’ll work with him on or if the producers at WMC are out of luck! 🙂

  7. I’m older than you are, so I’m afraid I’m not likely to be much help to you in your sunset years. My sister and I have already figured out our plan: our niece gets Mom, and we’ll come and visit now and then, and then when we’ve become the Two Weird Aunts, our great-niece will take care of us, since our own children will be heartily sick of us by then. We figure the attic will be fine (not the basement, because we’re both claustrophobic) as long as we have cable and pizza delivery. We haven’t asked Emma how she feels about our plan, since she’s not quite 2 yet, but we intend to win her over slowly, so that eventually she’ll think it was her own idea. Brilliant, don’t you think?

    Just imagine what your nieces and nephews have planned for YOU!

  8. Hey Joe. You should always be ready for the “when are you going to give me grandkids” talk when Mum’s visit. My Mum fully accepts and is happy with her “furry” grandkids. They go nuts when I say we are going to see “Gran”. However, the inlaws don’t believe that dogs should be allowed as substitutes so we only get pressure from them.
    You get the “you’ll understand once you have them” line, but I don’t want to have kids and then realise that I don’t share that same opinion because there’s no handing back in!
    All the best to your Mum – she looks like she is dealing with being posted on the internet in her stride.

  9. Joe, normally I would gladly offer to wipe up your drool in your dotage (I’m a helpful kind of person). Unfortunately, despite being a few years younger (I’m 36) I’m afraid by the time you need me I’ll be in a worse situation than you! You see, I love cheese. Also, I smoke. And I always forget to exercise. I’ll be needing all the help. Hmm. Since I don’t plan to breed and I’ll never be rich, I’d better keep in good with youngest brother … Oh, well. Maybe they’ll have those suicide booths by then.

    And hey! Wow, I see where you get your meat thing from …

  10. I’m sure you’ve heard this before…but you and your mom have the exact same eyes!

    (Well, not the EXACT same. I’m sure she has her own set of eyes.)

  11. hey joe, ramdom but what is the srtangest question you’ve been asked at a convention?

  12. PS: The story of your mum & the nori is hysterical! Were you embarrassed? I know a few people who are like that about nori. I, on the other hand, adore seaweed, and fervently wish the Japanese didn’t add dashi to everything – as a vego it’s highly frustrating.

  13. So happy you have decided to make this site your home. Excellent! I hope you and your mom have a great time!

    Have a Merry Christmas, Mallozzi household, and a very Happy New Year.

    Lady Conure

  14. Ah, that was sweet of you to answer me! Grouper, blackened with smoked paprika & red pepper, is truely my favorite.

    My husband is Italian and agrees with the abomination of thin-crust pizza. His favorite dish to cook on Christmas Eve is Caponata di Pesce.

    Enjoy your mother’s cooking. And, ignore the “child” harping…my mother used to harp on me for children and I explained I wasn’t going to have them until she decided it TRUELY was not going to happen. Tadah! It workede well.

  15. During a scene in Sam’s office, I could’ve sworn I saw a picture of Jack. Am I insane, or did I really see that?

  16. Sorry can’t help you in your older years .. I’m a coupla years older than you so… won’t be much help. You’d be there in your wheelchair (with pugs laying around your feet) waiting for me to take you to the loo and I’d be wandering around your house aimlessly looking for my teeth, using the teatowel to dry the drool from my chin. Nice visuals eh?

    I’m going to google the name of the dish you mentioned your mum is making. Looks nice (beef fan here).

    Tell your mum I don’t like nori either. Tastes oddly like………seaweed. 😛
    She was right in my opinion to retrieve those tasty morsels from the nori cone..

  17. Bonsoir Joseph,
    Ha ben comme ça on est un p’tit anglais de Montréal ? Hé ben, moi qui a toujours pensé que les anglais du Québec étaient toute des bebittes étranges, tu me fais changer d’idée (ben non, c’est ironique !Y faut ben que je sorte mon petit côté québécois français baveu de temps en temps !!! ) Non mais sans blague, pour ce qui est des enfants c’est évident que toutes les mères disent à un moment donné à leur grands enfants de la trentaine et plus :«piiiiiis, c’est quand que je vais être enfin grand-mère ? » avec une p’tite lueur d’espoir dans les yeux. Moi, je suis chanceuse un de mes frères vient d’avoir des jumeaux, j’ai un moment de repos pour un bout ! Pour ce qui est de t’aider avec ton mangé mou quand tu sera trop vieux, ben désolé de ne pas pouvoir t’aider sur ce coup, j’aurai probablement besoin d’aide au même moment que toi !!!

    «Pauline Says:
    Oh thank god it’s a cork screw!!

    At first I thought it was either a Zat Gun or something a Gynaecologist would be proud to own.»

    Haaaa ! I thought the same thing at first !
    Have a nice evening everyone !

  18. I’ve watched ‘Judgment at Nuremberg’ and ’12 Angry Men’. Excellent movies. Anything with Henry Fonda and Spencer Tracy is just awesome.

    Got any favorite classic sci-fi flicks you like? Mine is ‘The Day the Earth Stood Still’. Favorite horror is ‘Creature From the Black Lagoon’.

  19. oh, and as for Aussie nosh up. One dish we love to do on a hot summer’s night (ie: like tonight) fresh shelled prawns marinated in orange juice, lemon juice, sweet chilli sauce, garlic and a hint of honey. Throw them on the BBQ and then serve steaming hot. The only cutlery required is a toothpick. Need to have either ocean or bush in the background. Not the same otherwise.

  20. JM said: I was referring to the cover art. As someone who works in scifi, a genre that rarely gets much mainstream respect, I am the last person who would diss another genre. So, you’re published? Anything my mom might enjoy?

    Whew. My faith in you is restored! I have to agree, the cover art on romances is often horrendous. When I first tell new friends that I’m a writer, my next comment is usually “I have nothing to do with cover art or title decisions, so don’t blame me!”

    I don’t know…what does your mom like? Tell you what, I’ll pick out a couple of mine and a friend or two and send them to the Bridge for you to pass on to her later. And if you tell me what she likes, I’ll make some recommendations of other authors.

    Looks like you and mum are having a great visit. LOL on the dogs. My mom is seriously considering getting a yorkie puppy after the death of her 16 year old cattle dog mix a few months ago. I keep telling her yorkies are a pain in the arse, and she needs a pug or a French bulldog instead, but…you know how moms are. Only seems to make her more determined to get a yorkie.

    WB

  21. oh great… just realised orechietti has no beef! lol ..sounds good anyway. Just watched a recipe on it. Does mum use parmigan cheese or the ol’ traditional fried breadcrumbs? I watched this vid on it.. as I like to see new recipes.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1mktSR6H68

    You a lucky son to have a mama come over and cook for you.. I wonder if she’s a chocolate afficianado like her son 😉

    And agreed… ltcolerrandboy, I wondered what Joe’s gift was. I thought it was a fancy hose attachment for the garden.. or something you use to make drinks with.

    You get alot of nice stuff Joe. Lucky debbil!!!

  22. So much for you having a choice about where to blog. Sort of like “Hobson’s choice,” only different.

    It was great when NBC decided to renew Friday Night Lights. I loved the first season, and had high hopes for adding another show to my own list of “Must-See TV.” (At present the list contains Stargate: Atlantis, Eureka, FNL, any movie or mini-series with Colin Firth, plus the seasonal addition of the best football match-up of the week.) This season, though, the murder sub-plot has had me grumbling about melodrama that’s supposed to appeal to my demographic. *sticks out tongue at the people who hold the purse strings* But I still see enough of what hooked me initially to keep me watching.

    “Sexy private nurses,” sheesh…. That is so totally a guy thing. >.> Me, I want a private masseur; and depending on his skill-set (euphemistically speaking), I would in return be his private nurse. A little quid pro quo. – I have yet to run this idea by my husband….

    Have you read Urth of the New Sun by Gene Wolfe? I read it a year ago, and still don’t quite know what to think. It’s the densest fictional material I’ve read in some time, maybe even more so than the (unfortunately) nonfictional Intermediate Blogging Concepts for the Cyberworld-Challenged, or even Alan Greenspan’s autobiography. – I’d love to hear your opinion of the series, if you’ve read it.

  23. “So, what am I to do when the time comes? Well, that’s where all of you come in.”

    for a minute i was worried you were thinking of adopting us.

    UBIK, eh? enjoy! i recommend just about all the Philip K. Dick you can get your hands on. kudos for a little mini-PKD mind-frak episode last season in “The Real World.”

    arguably, This Mortal Coil was sort of PKDish too in regard to the “Am I Elizabeth Weir?” stuff. the Asurans present all sorts of “what does it mean to be human(ancient)” questions, so i’m hoping that’ll get explored even more. heck, “Michael” had some of those same questions too. now, i’ll have to watch the DVDs. you crafty writers, you.

  24. Hi Joe!
    i don’t know if you read your yahoo e-mail lately, but i’m going to be in Vancouver for the holidays!Woo ooh!! My last day at work is Monday and i was wondering if it’s ok if i could leave you a x-mas gift at the gate?

    My only SG-1 question is: What is your fav Sam/Jack Kiss in the show?
    a) Broca Divide kiss
    b) WoO kiss
    c) PoV kiss
    d) Grace kiss
    or e) Moebius kiss ?

    My answer is D !!!!!

  25. Just be careful about duplicating content as Search Engines penalise against it. And Blogger may think it’s spam again. Although I’m guessing you are not really looking for Search Engine traffic.

  26. Oh, I love Judgment at Nuremburg. It’s on my Christmas wishlist, but I bet I’ll get candles again this year. I already have enough to burn down my house and workplace.

    Speaking of intense courtroom drama, any chance we’ll see something of that nature in SGA? Maybe a trial to determine if it’s safe for Elizabeth Weir to return to the city next year, even with her nanites? I’m crossing my fingers for her to be alive….

    Take care.

  27. LOL–Great entry, although, it would be cool to have a JM Jr. to carry on the blogging (oh and Sci-fi writing 😉 legacy.

    Question: Why do you think certain female fans (and others) seem to enjoy whumping so much? I’ve oft wondered why I seem to enjoy episodes where Daniel, Jack, Sheppard etc (Paradise Lost, Doppelganger, Solitudes)., endure some injury so much. I have my theories, but I’d like to hear what you think fuels the phenomenon. After all, I shouldn’t want to see my fave characters injured!!

    All the best,

    Royal

  28. Greetings!

    Thanks for your suggestions in regards to Vancouver-area restaurants, I’ll note them for the future if (and hopefully when) I decide to go there for a vacation.

    I’m glad to hear that you have made a decision regarding your blog. Also, your mother’s food looks amazing! Let her know that the cybernation is jealous we can’t try her food!

  29. Mom cooking? Hope you have a nice sized freezer so that you can store some of it for later. Especially useful with the significant other is out of town and you havent the energy to head to your favorite eatery. Thinking about you retirement idea. I’m afraid most of us wouldnt be willi…um, able, to come to assist you in your dotage. However, with planning, we might be able to work out a system where you say a few days with someone, then sent to the next person. Perhaps an itinerary starting straight down the west coast, then ship you to South America, Australia, back up the island chains to Japan, over to mainland Asia…This plan would limit the personal items you’d be able to carry, but the dogs should do fine, at least till you get to England and their quarantine. Anyways, no questions today; looks like you already have enough questions pending.

  30. My mother bought me a Cookie Monster t-shirt (yay!) but after I wore it twice she took it off me and wrapped it up because “you have less Christmas presents than your sister.”

    I blame Baron Destructo.

    So, what are the dogs getting for Christmas?

  31. Hi Joe!

    Wow, I was looking at your awesome new corkscrew, and was thinking (in Firefly mode), “Shiny!” 🙂 Then I was thinking, “Ooooh, cool Asuran weapon!” Seems to me it could be both! You?

    Mmmmmm…mom food. Ain’t nuthin’ better…except Mmmmmm…mom does dishes! ;P

    Hey, you’re about what age? Since I’m younger than Joe F. and older than Shep, I’m thinking we’ll be poking each other with canes from our super-ultra-cool floating wheelchair thingies, so you’re gonna have to hit up the young’uns on this blog, and I’ll be hitting up my nieces and nephews. We have “furry children” too, and expect to outlive them (sigh), so unless my blog gets as popular as this, A, J, L, and S are gonna be my future caretakers!

    Anne Teldy – this is the start of the Official Release Sheppard Campaign!! Let Sheppard go and no one has to get hurt (except Shep, if you’re a whumper). Free Shep! Free Shep!

    eddy who surprisingly enjoyed a nice cask-conditioned Christmas ale tonight!

  32. I like WordPress, especially if Blogger is being so poo to you.

    My birthday is tomorrow. Care to give me a shout out? 😀 I love your blog, and me and Mom read it everyday (She is the one that got me hooked to SGA-and currently I am watching SG1 as well…watching them in this order has been an experience….)

    My name is Andrea^^

    Glad to see ya back, and enjoy your Mom’s cooking xD

  33. Your Mom’s cooking looks fifty million times better than the microwave dinner I had tonight during my dinner break at work. Nothing beats Mom Food!

  34. I know that their has been some dispute over the international military operations on Stargate Atlantis. I say this in regards to the Daedalus Class ship’s that are always USAF and not from any other country.

    I know the Korolev didn’t work out*ka boomb*, but perhaps in season five we could see some more ships or personal from other countries?

  35. I quite forgot to have children, and my nieces and nephews are exceedingly useless. I am beginning to see how kids would be great when the snow is piling up in the driveway or I need a ride somewhere. Oh yes, I forgot to learn how to drive too. I figured a way around all that though. My good friends are literally half my age. I acquired them reared, housebroken and educated. It does not hurt that they’re in the will and I’m a soft touch when the bills are due.

    No really, they are great people and truly my friends. They gave me nice gifts for Solstice; if the nieces bother, they shop at the Dollar Store. I know what side my potential future nursing home is buttered on.

  36. If RDA is around to film an SGA episode, can you make such that; he is a major, leading role, and really driving home the story. (IE, Something that needs his ATA gene.)

  37. Someone has mentioned on GW that the Replicators, weren’t actually using Aurora class ships, in that episode. As the ship had the pinser things.

    What lead to them having the different *head* of the ship? Was there a problem with the VFX or was the designer and writers just looking for more of a *signature feature* for the Replicators?

  38. (I’m assuming you’re all very slow readers)

    Haha. Your whole blog takes me around two minutes to read.

    Elizabeth writes: “What Isaac Asimov books would you suggest (I haven’t read very much sci-fi yet)?”
    Answer: I’d suggest starting with his Robot series. Try I, Robot.

    Thank you, I will.

    Ronnie writes: “My husband is a Major stationed in Iraq currently […] Anyway, he really likes Sam (who wouldn’t?) and wanted to know if on Atlantis you guys had said whether she got together with Jack.”
    Answer: We have yet to say. Wish your husband all the best for a safe holiday and new year.

    Are you going to say? Please?

  39. Hello Joe 🙂 Long time lurker, first time poster. Well, I found your Blogger site by accident, actually, about 4 months ago. I’ve been reading ever since. I love your food critiques.

    If you’ve ever said anything about what I’m about to ask, I don’t recall reading it, so I apologize.

    Have you ever had fried pickles?

  40. Pauline Says:
    Oh thank god it’s a cork screw!!

    At first I thought it was either a Zat Gun . . .

    Funny. I thought it might be the new and improved super deluxe zat’nikatel, too.

  41. joe, your s/j answer ‘we have yet to say’ is driving me nuts! it’s a short drive for me! heck, i don’t even have to leave the driveway! 😯 but whatever, who needs sanity to function anyways? 😛

    sally 😀

  42. “I love the dogs,”my mother admitted as we drove up Burrard Street, “but grandchildren are better.” I seriously doubted it but still felt the need to point out the two didn’t have to be mutually exclusive. Hell, to be honest, there are times when I think it WOULD be nice to have a kid around the house – you know, to keep the dogs company and run sundry errands. “It wouldn’t be for me,”she insisted “but for yourself.”

    Ah, the reasoning of a parent. Having grandchildren wouldn’t be for your mother but for you, which is true; however . . . having grandchildren first requires having children (see how I was able to follow the logic of this?) and I’m quite sure that’s the unspoken plea being made.

    As for your senile years, can’t help you there since I’m older than you and will probably be in need of some elder care before you do. *Sigh* It’s depressing to realize that somehow everyone managed to become younger than I am. No idea how that could have happened. (See how I can’t follow the logic of this? Denial is such a comfort sometimes.) Unless, of course, they all managed to run into Todd and he was feeling really generous.

  43. Hope this isn’t too personal a question. Was just curious about how you and Fondy met. (Of course, feel free to ignore this question!)

    And an SGA-related question… I watched a Q&A video with Joe F. on Sci-Fi’s (?) website last night. He made a comment about how he just pays his dues as a writer. Then is he affected by the writer’s strike? (And what character/kind of character did/does he play on Women’s Murder Club?)

    Thanks! Hope you’re having a good week.

  44. Weird question: Will we see any of the team (John, Rodney, Teyla, Ronon) cry this season?

  45. Your Mom sounds hilarious at the restaurant. “Let me take this careful creation and smash it.” I can see the looks of horror coming from the kitchen. Priceless moments.

    Sorry for the mostly sucky gifts from corporate. What more could you expect. They don’t sound too personal. The corkscrew set sounds awesome though. It’s sounds like somebody at Sci-Fi likes you.

    Enjoy the spoils of war (so to speak).

  46. Hey Joe, got a question.

    In several SG:A episodes, the writers seem to try to make the Asurans different from the replicators that plagued SG-1 and the Asgard, but then contradict that effort by constantly calling them ‘The Replicators’. So my question is: Why continue calling them ‘The Replicators’ when they are, apparently, a completely different kind of beastie?

    Thanks,

    Jarnin

  47. Hi Joe

    Just finished reading ‘The Blade Itself’, and started ‘The Lies of Locke Lamora’. Wanted to say thanks for pointing me in their direction.

    You have mentioned ‘Little Fuzzy’ which I read in the early 80’s and really enjoyed. Have you read ‘Fuzzy Sapiens’ or ‘Fuzzies and other People’?

    Eccles

  48. Does McKay figure out how to use chocolate against the kids in Trio.???

    Tell Martin G. I still adore the chocolate scene with the kids in “Childhood’s End.”

  49. Ha-ha! You said “I don’t need all 6 398 of you to scoop up the dog crap from my backyard, vacuum my house, or clean out my fridge – although it would certainly go a lot quicker.”

    Well, I’m really bad at cleaning out my own fridge, but I’d gladly come over to your place and finish off those lovely people-bags-masquerading-as-doggie-bags from the splendid array of restaurants you and Fondy enjoy. Just think of it: no more tell-tale styrofoam/plastic/paper/foil debris. [Reminds me of one time I went to the Royal Alex holding a swan made of foil containing my leftover Lobster Thermidor!]

    Just me, licking my lips. And that means the fridge would be sorta, kinda clean. I’m just trying to be helpful. Really. *giggles*

  50. The wordpress counter wouldn’t include anyone reading off the RSS feed I assume so really the number of people reading this could be the equivalent of a small city. You could instigate your very own uprising and take over the world. Just something to ponder while practising your evil laugh over breakfast (“Don’t laugh malevolently with your mouth full”. “But Muuuum.”)

    The cockscrew does look very fancy and shiny, and maybe the card is impregnated with grape seeds so that in 5-10 years you could have your very own vineyard. Just spend your time clutching the corkscrew in your hand while staring wistfully out of your kitchen window, watching, watching, always watching. There could be a movie! If you can get Meryl Streep to play the corkscrew while John Malkovich plays the card I can guarantee at least a couple of Oscar nominations.

  51. Hey Joe,
    I was wondering if you have ever watched the anime Wolf’s Rain?
    If not, i suggest you should check it out. It really is great!

  52. Number one reason why pets are better than kids….if your pet gets knocked up, you can sell the offspring.

    PS, I am a nurse, and I am pretty sure that a “sexy private nurse” does not exist in the real world….

  53. Personally I am of the opinion that all dogs need to grow up with a child, it teaches them valuable life lessons in sharing and pecking order,my dogs have never been without a child to play with and kids can also come in handy in your old age, you don’t need to worry about leaving your inheritance to the local cats and dogs home unless they fail in their duty of care….unless you’re an evil genius mastermind in which case you’ll already have the greatest scientific minds under armed guard and threat of witholding TV Viewing rights working on your personal cure for old age. I say go with the kid idea but FCOL if you’re going to do it have a couple. Its a lonely life as an only child.

  54. “narellefromaus Says:
    oh, and as for Aussie nosh up…The only cutlery required is a toothpick. ”

    Toothpick? What for? You got fingers, haven’t you? I’ve never picked up a prawn with a toothpick!

    But yeah. “Shrimp” maybe what North Americans eat – Aussies chuck prawns on the barbie. I do an awesome seafood marinade with ginger, garlic, chilli and lemongrass…Joe, have you ever tried marron (freshwater crayfish)…it’s choice! Sweeter than ocean lobster, goes well with a nice chenin blanc…

  55. Sexy nurses ? Trust me, you’ll prefer the strong ones who can get you to the toilet and back without dropping you.

    I think you’d be a great Dad. The patience, restraint, generosity, and imagination you show on this blog attest to that. And of course you are fun & creative.

    The one regret I have in life is putting off having children. I urge anyone doing the same , to explore the probability of birth defects with older parents.

  56. AV eddy wrote:

    Anne Teldy – this is the start of the Official Release Sheppard Campaign!! Let Sheppard go and no one has to get hurt (except Shep, if you’re a whumper). Free Shep! Free Shep!

    As I did not kidnap Col. Sheppard, merely placed him in protective custody, he is free to leave whenever he wishes.

    Anne Teldy (That interruption? Uhm. No. It wasn’t good news. Sorry, John. Baron Destructo still has Mallozzi and it isn’t safe for you to be out and about. Would you like some more oysters or some chocolate? Don’t forget to take this little blue viatamin….)

  57. joshmeyers Says:

    If RDA is around to film an SGA episode, can you make such that; he is a major, leading role, and really driving home the story. (IE, Something that needs his ATA gene.)

    It’s been already stablished in the show that John can naturally operates Ancient devices like the chair, and better than anybody else.
    Why Atlantis would need O’Neill’s ATA gene? If a plot requires the ATA gene from someone who hasn’t gotten it through the gene therapy, John is the one that should be there, not O’Neill.
    As of the “major, leading role”… Sorry, but Atlantis already has a leading actor who should carry the leading role in a plot such as this. There’s no need to bring someone from another show for that, even in a guest spot.

    We already know that Michael Shanks and probably Christopher Judge will likely guest star in some s5 episodes. If RDA was to guest star too… Three SG-1 characters having guest spots in the same season? Plus, likely, Sam reprising her role on a permanent basis. Sam as the base commander is OK, and another SG-1 character getting a guest spot per season is OK, if he/she could do something the people on Atlantis can’t do. But, with only 20 episodes per season, I think having yet ANOTHER actor from SG-1 making yet another guest appearance would be too much. If Atlantis gets a season 6, then there could be some RDA, and no MS and CJ at all, in s6. But all of them in the same season? No, thanks. If I wanted to watch SG-1 characters, I would watch SG-1. Something I never did. SG-1 has already 2 movies and possible at least one more in the future. Leave the SG-1 characters to the SG-1 movies, Why the need to force their characters into Atlantis, even as guest stars? Atlantis has its own characters who are perfectly capable of doing their job in their respective departments. No need to bring others for doing what they can already do.
    If things had been the other way around, I’m sure SG-1 fans wouldn’t have liked having people asking for 3 of the Atlantis characters making guest appearances all the time in the new SG-1 season, plus one of the Atlantis characters already on a permanent basis there … And I’m sure SG-1 fans wouldn’t like if John Sheppard played a major, leading role in one of the SG-1 movies… I’d think that, when someone watches an SG-1 movie, they expect SG-1 characters playing all the important parts and getting the most screen time. Why would things be different for Atlantis fans when watching Atlantis? When watching an Atlantis episode, the ones that should be playing all the important parts and getting more screentime are the SGA characters.

  58. Hi, Joe.

    What your mom thinks of all this blog stuff? She must think it is ok if she is allowing you to post pics of her for the whole world to see. : )

    So that odd looking piece is a corkscrew. I thought it was some new piece of ancient technology that Rodney had found. ; )

  59. Awww! I had a feeling that my question was either a) too spoilery, b) not sure yet, or c) a little of both. I guess I’ll just have to wait until you write your S5 poem that’s filled with all kinds of hints and goodies. Love the one you wrote for S4. You’re going to write one for S5 aren’t you Joe?

    You didn’t let your dogs know that they weren’t living up to ‘grandchildren status’ did you? I’m sure they’re doing the best they can, but if you feel the need for a temporary ‘grandchild’ replacement, I have a 16 year old son that I would be happy to loan you for your Mother’s stay. He’d probably blend right in. He loves dogs, loves good food, and his middle name is Joseph so………..

    BTW how tall are you Joe? My 16 year old is 6’7″ and still growing. *sigh* It really gives new meaning to “You’re grounded. Go to your room!”

  60. I also am without children to look out for me in my old age. But I am not worried, isn’t that what nieces and nephews (9 all together) are for? ; ) I even have four great nieces and nephews. I have always said that they are my retirement plan. They just don’t know it yet. ; )

  61. Joe,

    Whats it like being a showrunner as compared to head writter? I’ve always wanted to go into television or movies. How do you get in on the ground floor?

    Also, I just finished Spin and I have to say I was disappointed by the ending. Do you think there are sequels in there?

    Thanks,

    Jake

  62. Hi there Mr M.
    Thanks for answering my question…. Would have been a cool and sneaky way to spirit Repli-Rodney back to Atlantis…The old “wrong uniform / right uniform” switcheroo….As Maxwell Smart might say!
    Your mother’s cooking looks divine!! I’m shutting down for the hols today and I live in a ‘net free house (as decreed by Her Royal Highness and their Imperial Majesties),so I shall miss your blog for a few days. Have a great holiday and warmest wishes to all the Mallozzis!

    Take care!

    Shirt’n’Tie

  63. Hey Joe!

    Quick question – even though we saw the hive ship go boom, is there ANY chance at all of bringing Ford back for Season 5?

  64. Hi Joe, is your Mom a cleaner?

    I always have to buy a new tooth brush when my Mom comes for her yearly visit – she actually uses it to clean around the edge of the access port where you put the laundry detergent in the washing machine – without my mom I’d be suffering from the dreaded and nasty “Cold Water Tide dribble build up”!

  65. Dear Joe,

    I did not wanted the have chidren when I married because : I had no job then, no money, no time, no home, no interest, no patience, no tenderness etc. etc. etc. …
    Five children later, I have a job but I still have no money, no time, no home ( yes I have one but the only place I can feel to be HOME is in the shower or in the tv room IF I’m watching Stargate, Atlantis or rewatching Farscape ! ), no patience etc. etc. …and I am not so sure that any of my children will be willing to change my diapers when I will be incontinent !!

    BUT, you should see my mother’s smile when she looks at her great-grandson !!!! And my wife’s smile when this furling of sort gives her a hug !!

    However, it is a great mistery to understand why am I too young to be a grandfather and, in the same time, why is my wife old enough to be a grandma ??!!!

    Cao amico,

    P.S. I can give you some clue about the birds and the bees and how babies come…when you know the basics, there is a lot of fun to have, trust me ! HOUU LA LA!

  66. So you’re all tim tammed out. You need to pace yourself with those suckers, especially the double choc ones (I assume you get those over there…double coated in choccie and only 8 to a pac- stingy bastards they are).

    Ok..well I know Australia have some native bush tomatoes and similar fruits that have a citrusy flavour and are dried and used for spices and such.. be nice for meat. I’ll hunt some down and send to the studio for you and Fondy to play around with.. after Christmas!

  67. Joe,

    Have you read Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell?

    I started this book maybe 5 times but found it utterly boring. What did you think?

    -Jake

  68. Bonjour Joe,

    J’ai lu que le tournage de la saison 5 d’Atlantis commencera au mois de février 2008.

    Et comme on y sera vite en février je voudrais savoir si vous connaissez déjà les acteurs qui feront partie du casting “principal” ou est-ce que les négociations sont toujours en cours?

    En résumé, qui verra-t-on ? Torri ? Jewel ? Amanda ? Paul ? (Je ne demande pas pour les autres car je me doute bien que David, Rachel, Joe et Jason seront là).

    Merci et bonne journée.

  69. Joe, when a French writer asks you a question can you also include the English trnalation of the question and your answer. I feel your Enginsh users are missing out on half the fun. Also, those who speak and read only French are probably missing out as well. Sorry, will this be too much work?

  70. 1)Will anyone become consumed with anger, revenge, or jealousy to the point where it begins to interfere with their duties and their relationships?

    2)Will the difference between the Replicators who strive to liken themselves to humans and those who would exact universal domination be explored more this season?

  71. LOL I volunteer for dusting, puppy walking and laundry duty when the time comes! I am a pretty good cook, but I will leave that to someone else I think you would be to intimidating to cook for LOL! LOL!
    I like it here! I think you should stay is my vote, not that it matters this late in the polling but just to through my two cents in.
    I just finished the “Time Travelers Wife” and the “Princess Bride” and am waiting and ready with my opinions!

  72. Dear Joe,

    From the sound of things to come in the episodes BAMSR and spoils of war you guys are going to write off the asurans… I only hypothesize this due to their apparent absence in the rest of the season….can you please clarify. I also would like to know, if you are willing to enlighten me of course, a little more about the star ship the Pheonix that will appear in the season finale…will it be another BC 304 like the Apollo or something completely new. Je vous souhaite un joyeux noel a vous ainsi que toutes votre famille et je vous souhaite un merveilleux nouvel an avec beaucoup d’amour, de success et de joie.

    Amite

    Rachid

  73. Casting in with a vote, I’m preferring the blog via WordPress. Am particularly enjoying the green background and Christmas tree motif. Very holiday festive. : )

    So, the lovely shiny thing in the box was an all lever corkscrew gift from SciFi? And here I was wondering if it was some heretofore unknown prop from the Atlantis set.

    By the by, I’d asked you some time back about tea infused chocolates. You’d suggested the Luxury Tea Collection from Christopher Norman. My sweet husband has spoiled me by getting it as a Christmas gift. I tried the first piece the other night – one of the China Rose. I think I now understand how you feel when you go all detailed in your lovely food descriptions. Because it was – WOW – some of the most delightful chocolate I’d ever eaten. Just the right balance of dark and sweet. And the rose flavor was so subtle – more as an aftertaste – just the way it is when I’ve drank tea flavored with rose petals. So thanks for the suggestion. I’m looking forward to sampling the other flavors, especially the Lapsang. (That’s my favorite tea, as it turns out, and so I’m saving what I hope will be the best for last.)

  74. This site isn’t bad at all, just takes a little getting used to…

    Have you ever seen
    http://www.goodreads.com ?

    I think you’d like it and it’s highly addictive. You add what books you’re reading and rate them, and then compare them to your friends/families books.

    Although save yourself some embarassment and learn from my mistakes: do NOT put “How to Write a Dirty Story” on your reading list unless you have very open-minded friends.

  75. Pauline Says:
    “Oh thank god it’s a cork screw!!

    At first I thought it was either a Zat Gun or something a Gynaecologist would be proud to own.”

    WHAT kind of GYN have you been going to??? (LOL) Sheesh…if my GYN pulled out that shiny thing with the corkscrew doohickey on it, he would get a swift kick in the face as I vaulted out of the stirrups!!!

    I think it looks like something Michael the Wraith would invent and use!

    As a corkscrew it looks way too big, complicated and fancy for me. Give me some Arbor Mist with a screw on cap! Yeah…I have high-class taste in wine…can you tell? I really love the Merlot….only 6% alcohol…more like a wine cooler than regular wine…but yum! Put some Dove chocolate with it and I am a happy camper!

    Inexpensively,
    Kimberly

  76. I should really start reading ALL previous blog entries before I post a comment on a previous post! Sorry about the comment on the post before this one. Now that I’ve read what’s up with blogger, I completely agree that they’re being asshats and that this site is better. Glad I’ve never had those problems with bloggers yet!

    The story of your mom and the nori was great! Thanks for sharing such fun tidbits! And as for taking care of you in your old age, I’ll help out with the dog walking, dog grooming, and other dog-related activities! Yes, I am a dog person. 🙂

    Curiously, how is Carl holding up throughout the strike? Is he just busting with ideas, writing them down to share scripts with y’all later after the strike is over? Is it really hard for him to not be participating in SGA with y’all? Or is he okay with it, knowing that he’s helping for a good cause?

  77. I’ve figured out what it is about wordpress that was doing my head in. I’m mildly dyslexic and read white on black far better then black on white. Very glad that you’re going to be updating the other site bit by bit. I’m also looking forward to reading the book selections of the month over the holidays. They keep taunting me from the bookshelf….

  78. Hi Joe

    With your Italian heritage , I was wondering if you have nay different traditions around the holiday season. That is in respect to food, to special customs?

    Dori

  79. Joe — I’m making a prime rib roast for Christmas dinner and I’m trying to decide between two recipes. What sounds better — prime rib with Shittake pan gravy, or with orange balsamic glaze? Or do you have a better suggestion altogether?

  80. Oh, Lulu – she wanted that cushion so very, *very* much, didn’t she? And Max (I think, sorry, still getting the pugs’ names sorted in my mind) really, *really* didn’t want to give it up!!! LOL!

    Thanks for posting that, it cheered my cold-infested self right up – and amused my husband as well! Ta muchly, as a friend of mine says!

  81. In case Carl Binder is reading… bad writer, no cookie! Since you slackers won’t be on the picket lines on Friday, we’ve been forced to eat your cookies for you. We’ll catch up with you in the New Year once you’re back! With fresh ones of course. No month-old cupcakes, we promise.

  82. Hi! Uh, guys from the rescue team (Anne Teldy, do you REALLY think Col. Shep needs the blue vitamins??) I think it’s one of our “spork” nikatels 🙂 not really a corkscrew. Ha ha.

    To whomever asked about Joe F on Women’s Murder Club (sorry too lazy to look back through for a name) – he was in the last 3 minutes of the episode as an FBI guy – apparently he will be a love interest for Lindsey (Angie Harmon) who plays a SF homicide detective. I’m not sure when their new episodes air, but they’ve been running reruns on hmm CBS or ABC? Fridays at 9 and Saturdays at 10.

    Joe – hope you are having a great time with your mom. Did you get a Wii? I want that game with the pinatas. My daughter and I think it looks like fun.
    wams352 (aka dixon-stubblefield blog)

  83. Oh, sorry to leave a 2nd comment but for your mom – I just read a book by Alyssa Day – the title caught me – Atlantis Rising – so then I went back and read Atlantis Awakening (or maybe I’ve reversed those) – but they’re romance novels although in the contemporary paranormal genre, not one I really like per se, but with “Atlantis” in the title and our drought of episodes until January… I thought they were good reads.

    What are your mom’s favorite authors? Just curious. We are all learning about yours! Is your entire family into reading? Mine certainly is. My poor sister in law goes to Barnes and Noble with us and can only stand it for about 15 minutes – she doesn’t understand the family genetics – once one of us is absorbed in a book, we don’t surface without someone getting in our face 🙂 And all five (me & siblings) are like that…

  84. anneteldy Says:

    AV eddy wrote:

    Anne Teldy – this is the start of the Official Release Sheppard Campaign!! Let Sheppard go and no one has to get hurt (except Shep, if you’re a whumper). Free Shep! Free Shep!

    As I did not kidnap Col. Sheppard, merely placed him in protective custody, he is free to leave whenever he wishes.

    Anne Teldy (That interruption? Uhm. No. It wasn’t good news. Sorry, John. Baron Destructo still has Mallozzi and it isn’t safe for you to be out and about. Would you like some more oysters or some chocolate? Don’t forget to take this little blue viatamin….)

    Anne,
    Don’t make us have to sic Ronon and Teyla on you! After all with him out of the picture they are having to pick up his share of the whumpage. Rodney is hiding so he doesn’t have to take up the whumpage slack.

    John: Mallozzi is free! Don’t take the pills! Run!

  85. wams352 wrote:

    (Anne Teldy, do you REALLY think Col. Shep needs the blue vitamins??)

    I’m quite sure he doesn’t need them, but, seeing as I’d be his only outlet, I need him to take them.

    Anne Teldy (tirelessly protecting Sheppard 😈 )

  86. Leila wrote:

    Anne,
    Don’t make us have to sic Ronon and Teyla on you! After all with him out of the picture they are having to pick up his share of the whumpage. Rodney is hiding so he doesn’t have to take up the whumpage slack.

    John: Mallozzi is free! Don’t take the pills! Run!

    Hi. This is Anne Teldy. I’m currently on a protective custody assignment and can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave a message I’ll get back to you. BEEP.

    Anne Teldy (Sorry, John. Bad news. Baron Destructo’s minions may have located us. We’ve got to move. We’re going to check into the honeymoon suite. 😀 )

  87. Hi wams352, thanks for the description about Joe F’s character on Women’s Murder Club. I may have to tune in just to see him. 😀

  88. >>I have watched The Drunken Master. And I thought The Drunken Master II was great as well.

    Ooh, you know, i never watched that one. It’s going on my Wishlist pronto.

  89. Just noticed Joe that yet another person commented on the old blogger, not knowing that you are here.

    How on earth can we spread the word? Alot of these people aren’t contactable… and blind, seeing as someone commented just under your notice of relocation lol

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