Bad! Bad doggy movie. It lie down and play dead for almost one hour and twenty two minutes!. Me know, me know. "Come on, Monster. It be a kidz movie! Turn off your brain and just settle for dis crap entertainment. Your expectashuns should be lower." But monster ask "Why?". Sky High be a kidz…
January 14, 2013: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer!
Benign and inoffensive. Dat pretty much sum up dis movie. On de one hand, it not sink to craptastic lows of first FF movie; on de other hand, it never quite reach de lofty heights of mediocrity either. Reed Richards and Sue Storm be in love and want to get married. Meanwhile, silver alien on…
December 17, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Lightspeed!
Dis movie suck more den Grover's aunt Tildy at a Shriner's convention. Movie begin wit guy walking down a dark alley where he encounter shaky creep hiding under dirty blanket. To most sane people, dis be invitation to skedaddle. But not dis guy. He stand and watch as - in movie's most horrifying sequence -…
December 10, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews My Super Ex-Girlfriend!
Dis movie reminiscent of monster's ex-girlfriend, Mona Hildeberger. One time, she get so mad after me use dishwasher to dry socks dat she spike monster's L'Oreal shampoo wit Nair hair remover. For two months while wait for fur to grow back, me kept getting mistaken for member of Blue Man Group. Very unpleasant memories. Fortunately,…
November 26, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews X-Men: The Last Stand!
On de one hand, dis movie not as good as de original or sekwel. On de other hand, it not make monster want to vomit, kick in his t.v., or punch someone in de nards. Movie pick up where last one left off. Jean Grey be dead and X-Men be in mourning. Cue cornball cliche…
November 19, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Sky High!
Monster can't help but tink dat if Wonder Woman had been my high school principal, me could have accomplished so much more in life. Instead, here me is doing movie reviews to help support my cookie habit. But me suppose it could be worse. Monster could be reviewing Elektra again. Instead, dis week, me watch…
November 12, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Fantastic Four (2205)!
Okay, yes, dis be garbage movie but viewer have to keep in mind dat it made in 1994 by schlock producer Roger Corman for miniscule budget and film never meant to be released...Wait. What? Dis NOT de Roger Corman crapfest but de 2005 $100 million budget version? Are you sure? Hmmm. Monster just checked and…
October 8, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Elektra!
Dis movie as confused as monster at Grover's bris after me down four shooters, tree oatmeal cookies (de drink, not de cookie), and six oatmeal cookies (de cookies, not de drink). But me not de only one confused dat night. Turn out whole party giant misunderstanding. Girlfriend tired of Grover being taken advantage of by…
October 1, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews The Incredibles!
Me know, me know. You expecting monster to say dis movie be SUPER. Or mebbe INCREDIBLE! But me not so obvious. No, monster more unprediktable den Lindsay Lohan at one of Oscar de Grouch's Hobo Hoedowns. What me WILL say is dat monster pleasantly surprized by how much me enjoy dis movie considering it be…
September 24, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Catwoman!
How can movie about sexy bendy girl who wear leather outfit and carry a whip not be good? How possible? Well, why not we run down pros and cons of Catwoman. Cons: crappy akting, stoopid skript, lame direktion, annoying music, terruble speshul effekts. Pros: Not longer den 104 minutes. Hmmmm. Monster tink we have our…
The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Hulk (2003)!
At one point during movie, monster get so enraged he charge into food court and start smashing, stomping, screaming, and trowing Sbarro pizza toppings at frightened children when - Oh, sorry. Dis not scene from movie Hulk. Dis was Cookie Monster's REACTION to movie Hulk, one of de most tortuously long and plodding superhero movies…
August 27, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews X2: X-Men United!
Monster bummed after watching X2: X-Men United. Why? Becuz next to eat cookies, nothing me like better dan to complain. But X2: X-Men United not give monster much to complain about. It an even better movie dan original X-Men movie. For true! Movie kick off wit awesum aktion sekwence in which furry blue mutant (not…
August 20, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Daredevil!
What dat stink? Cheese? Crap? Oh, right. Me just watched Daredevil, so it be both.Movie begin wit young Matt Murdock whose father be a bum. We get cloying, painfully obvious shots of him cleaning up dad's beer bottles. When he visit dad at work at de dockyards, he told father doesn't work dere. He about…
August 13, 2012: The Supermovie of the Week Club Reconvenes! Cookie Monster reviews Spiderman!
What de Fudgee-o? Monster feel like he in Bizarro world where black be white, day be night, and superhero movies aktually be good! If X-Men was superhero movie made by people not embarrassed to be making a superhero movie, den Spiderman be superhero movie made by people who love superheroes - and comic books. It…
August 10, 2012: Days of Stargate Atlantis Past! Phantoms! Our Supermovie of the Week Club! Cookie Monster film reviews!
Had a phone conversation re: our comic book series, Dark Matter. It was actually a prelude to a much bigger conference call scheduled for next week, a creative discussion with a network rep. To be honest, the notion of doing Dark Matter as a feature has also been floated and, while I certainly wouldn't say…